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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
January 14th, 2011, 02:08 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 503
I am an unmarried 37 year old with a graduate degree. Never been pregnant before in my life. My boyfriend and I have been together on and off for almost a year and a half. We discussed having children many times...talked about names, etc. and so therefore we decided to try to sorta have a baby. Wasn't trying hard. Just not always using protection, kwim?

Anyhoo, my cycle is a 23 day cycle. Every now and then it will come b/w the 24 and 27 day mark. My period was due right before a vacation we had planned back in November. I figured that maybe it would just arrive by the 28th day. Nope. Never came during vacation. The day after we got back, I took a pregnancy test and it was clearly positive.

By my calculations, I believe I must be about 5 weeks pregnant (conception sometime right before Xmas). Here's why I'm freaking out. I keep reading about women finding out how far along they are by around 4-6 weeks. My understanding is that the age of the embryo is determined through ultrasound, correct? My problem is that I am self-employed and have no health insurance and the low price clinics and free clinics only seem to do pregnancy tests and nothing more. I have no idea about how to go about finding a doctor to get tested. I am worried because I am 37 years old, I have mild situational anxiety, asthma, really bad allergies, etc and am thinking that I really need to find a doctor soon!

To add to my stress, my BF keeps alternating between being excited and freaking out and being stressed. He's lost several children before they were born and he keeps saying that he will not be able to handle it if he loses another one. The last time was with his ex-fiancee 6 years ago - She had 2 stillbirths in the third trimester within a year and a half period.

I am completely paralyzed with fear and questions. Help!
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  #2  
January 14th, 2011, 02:38 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 2,992
Since you don't work or have any insurance i would go and see if you can get medicad it's a type of insurance but your not paying anything out of your pocket though.
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  #3  
January 14th, 2011, 03:01 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 503
I already looked up the Medicaid and also the program for perinatal care that my state has. I make too much money for both since the maximum you can make in one month for those programs is minimal - about 1800/month and I usually make more than that in a month but I am usually at a negative after taxes, rent, utilities, and groceries
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  #4  
January 14th, 2011, 07:26 PM
DramaFreeMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: The Burgh, PA
Posts: 1,623
Hi there and

Congrats on your BFP! That is definitely a tough situation you are in financially and without insurance. My only advice would be to go to a low price/free clinic for your first appointment (as soon as possible) and talk to someone about applying for WIC. There is a good chance you will qualify for that and it will save you about 70 dollars a month in groceries (more when the baby comes). Then you can get some affordable insurance with the money you save.

I think insurance is one of the most important things you need right now for your health and your baby's health. There are A LOT of doctors visits you will have to go to...and that doesn't even count the extra visits you may need if you have any complications.
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  #5  
January 14th, 2011, 07:41 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 503
I am so overwhelmed and I don't even know how to go about finding a low price clinic. The ones that I know about don't have ob/gyn services. I also doubt that I'd be able to purchase insurance being already pregnant and I am sure it would cost me more than 70 bucks considering all of my pre-existing conditions - alopecia, eczema, asthma, anxiety, and who knows what else that I don't even know about!

The office of the physician assistant that I have gone to in the past for my asthma might be able to give me some names of places...I don't know...

This is just such bad timing b/c I just moved in December to a new apt that is costing me almost 300 more a month than my old apt
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  #6  
January 14th, 2011, 08:18 PM
DramaFreeMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: The Burgh, PA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MsMack View Post
I am so overwhelmed and I don't even know how to go about finding a low price clinic. The ones that I know about don't have ob/gyn services. I also doubt that I'd be able to purchase insurance being already pregnant and I am sure it would cost me more than 70 bucks considering all of my pre-existing conditions - alopecia, eczema, asthma, anxiety, and who knows what else that I don't even know about!

The office of the physician assistant that I have gone to in the past for my asthma might be able to give me some names of places...I don't know...

This is just such bad timing b/c I just moved in December to a new apt that is costing me almost 300 more a month than my old apt
Even if it cost more than $70 a month, it will probably be cheaper than paying out of pocket for all your doctors visits and medical expenses. Not to mention the delivery itself will be very very expensive without insurance (especially if you have a complication and need extra care).

Can your boyfriend help with the cost of insurance or care? Is there anything you can cut back on? You may even have to take a different or second job. Not the most ideal situation or easy by any means...but you have to take care of your health. That is number one on the priority list.

I wish i could give some better advice to give. I really hope it works out for you.
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  #7  
January 14th, 2011, 08:55 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Texas
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My boyfriend only has temporary work. Sometimes he gets work a couple of times a week and sometimes he can go 2 or 3 weeks without any assignments. He lives with his parents so he won't be able to help much if at all.

As I stated before, I don't have a job. I am self-employed. I work 3 jobs from home already.

I've done some more research and it looks like the public hospital has to take everyone which I assume means that they don't have as high of an income eligibility limit as the state programs. However, they don't do sonograms unless there is a medical reason to and I'd probably end up giving birth in the hallway according to what I've read online and the bathrooms are only bathrooms with no showers. I don't know how they can determine how far along w/o a sonogram. I thought that was the way they determined the age of the embryo.

This is all so confusing.
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  #8  
January 15th, 2011, 11:32 PM
DramaFreeMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: The Burgh, PA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MsMack View Post
My boyfriend only has temporary work. Sometimes he gets work a couple of times a week and sometimes he can go 2 or 3 weeks without any assignments. He lives with his parents so he won't be able to help much if at all.

As I stated before, I don't have a job. I am self-employed. I work 3 jobs from home already.

I've done some more research and it looks like the public hospital has to take everyone which I assume means that they don't have as high of an income eligibility limit as the state programs. However, they don't do sonograms unless there is a medical reason to and I'd probably end up giving birth in the hallway according to what I've read online and the bathrooms are only bathrooms with no showers. I don't know how they can determine how far along w/o a sonogram. I thought that was the way they determined the age of the embryo.

This is all so confusing.
When i went in for my first prenatal appointment, the two doctors told me the estimated age of the embryo just by feeling and when i finally had my first sonogram at 12 weeks, they turned out to be right on point with what the sonogram said.

You don't need a sonogram to determine how far along you are. The doctors have other methods. Plus, you just can't go without prenatal care. You may just have to settle with waiting unless you have the extra money t pay for a sonogram. Sucks, i know but most hospitals only give sonograms when they think it is medically necessary.
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  #9  
January 16th, 2011, 09:28 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 503
By feeling? By feeling what??? (As I said, I'm very clueless...)
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  #10  
January 16th, 2011, 12:59 PM
DramaFreeMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: The Burgh, PA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MsMack View Post
By feeling? By feeling what??? (As I said, I'm very clueless...)
I wasn't 100 percent sure about my date of conception or last day of my menstrual period either. They told me they would do an u/s if i felt farther along then my original estimate (the one i got from planned parenthood when i took a urine pregnancy test).

I'm not sure exactly what they were feeling though lol. One doctor pressed down on my stomach and the other one felt up into my cervix with her finger. They said i felt about 8 or 9 weeks. I came back 4 weeks later for my 12 week u/s and he was measuring at 12 week 6 days, so they were exactly right along with the sonogram.
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Last edited by DramaFreeMama; January 16th, 2011 at 01:18 PM.
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  #11  
January 16th, 2011, 06:00 PM
Mom to minions's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Michigan
Posts: 657
I had one guess with my first my pressing on my abdomen and feeling my uterus?

Where do you live at? Have you tried someplace like a Pregnancy resource center? Or someplace like that and ask them where there are clinics that work on a sliding scale. Given you make 1800 a month and have no one else but you living with you, you may have to pay a bit, IDK if they take rent into account on those. BUT I once went to a clinic that added what you needed to your tab. BUT as long as you paid $20 a month, they would see you regardless of how much you owed because you still paid a little.
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  #12  
January 16th, 2011, 10:06 PM
AtomicMama's Avatar CopperBoom!
Join Date: May 2008
Location: MI
Posts: 14,754
I know in some states, if not all states, you are eligible for Medicaid regardless of income if you are pregnant and uninsured. Also, most states have other health care resources for pregnant women to ensure that everyone who needs help gets covered. They will deduct your rent, utilities, etc. from your income, so you should be able to qualify. If nothing else, it doesn't hurt to go to your county's Health Department and ask about it.
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  #13  
January 16th, 2011, 10:46 PM
Leogirl's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,163
I would set up an appt to talk to someone about medicade anyway. I had a friend that used it and was self-employeed. They have you bring in proof of what you make(I know she didn't tell them about everything she made), proof of what you pay in rent,utilities,phone,cable,car/renters/house insurance as the like and they deduct it out. Even if you don't qualifiy they can refer you to a program that will.
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  #14  
January 17th, 2011, 04:27 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 503
Life to the Max - Thanks. I already checked out the TX resource page last week. TX Medicaid has the same income eligibility guidelines that the state program for pregnant women has.

Leogirl - You say that your friend wasn't honest. I find it unethical to lie and I could risk my license if I were to lie to any governmental agency. My graduate degree cost me over 100K. Last thing I want to do is risk my license.
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  #15  
January 19th, 2011, 08:52 PM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Savannah GA
Posts: 13,417
Here you go: (This is for TX)... Good Luck Sweetie, I do not have health insurance either and have had to pay all medical expenses out of pocket. We have a credit card called care credit that is only for medical bills and we pay monthly on it.


Maternity Health Insurance - Pregnant without insurance
If you find yourself without maternity health insurance, and do not meet the eligibility requirements of Medicaid then contact your Local Department of Health. Many local health departments have low cost pre-natal programs and will offer complete maternity services at a reduced fee depending on your income.

You can also seek the help of Catholic Charities or Lutheran Social Services. They offer support for if you are pregnant with no insurance, including prenatal services at reduced cost.

Pregnant and Uninsured : Pregnancy, health insurance

CHIP (if you live in Texas)
Women who can't qualify for Medicare might be able to qualify for CHIP. They just started a program for maternity. It doesn't give a whole lot of financial wiggle room (especially if you are a 2 income family), but it's a sliding scale based on how big your family is. It might work for you, click here to find out the income guidelines. I think a family of 4 (they count your pregnancy- so if you just have 1 child, but you are pregnant, they count you as a family of 4) you can make up to $42,000 a year. If you can qualify, you pay like $50 every 6 months and they cover all your expenses. The only drawback is if you have a preferred doctor, they may not take CHIP, but heck, if you can qualify and aren't insured, I would make that sacrifice, or at least pay your doctor out of pocket. The most expensive part of pregnancy is the hospital/delivery anyways.
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  #16  
January 22nd, 2011, 06:51 PM
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What are you reporting your income to be? If you're self-employed, you can really alter your income "on paper" and no one will really be the wiser (assuming you report your income at all). If you go and file for medicaid/wic, understate your income...you should be able to search the income requirements online before you go and put down your total income. BUT, if you file taxes, you'll want to make sure you use the same income levels.
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  #17  
January 23rd, 2011, 12:11 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 503
Quote:
Originally Posted by hoping4XX View Post
What are you reporting your income to be? If you're self-employed, you can really alter your income "on paper" and no one will really be the wiser (assuming you report your income at all). If you go and file for medicaid/wic, understate your income...you should be able to search the income requirements online before you go and put down your total income. BUT, if you file taxes, you'll want to make sure you use the same income levels.
As an attorney, I report ALL of my income. My income is a few hundred dollars over the requirements for CHIP and Medicaid. I cannot understate my income b/c they require you to show them your tax return. Lying to the IRS is a federal criminal offense. I pay taxes on every penny I earn.

To the poster who posted the TX information - thanks! I have read all of that information but I think some of that info is incorrect. For WIC, they count your baby but I don't think they count your unborn baby as part of the family for Medicaid and CHIP purposes since their guidelines would not make any sense if they did. The guidelines start at a family of 1. If they counted the unborn baby, the starting point would necessarily be a family of 2, kwim?
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  #18  
January 24th, 2011, 10:22 AM
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 317
Ms Mack, I'm a federal employee and fully aware of the tax laws which is why I responded to you as I did. We all cut corners; we just call them deductions.

Since it doesn't seem that you are eligible for any state programs, the only other option is to find an OB/MW who will allow you to pay as you go; at least the probability will be be high that next year you'll meet the requirements to be able to deduct a portion of you medical expenses on your tax return
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  #19  
January 27th, 2011, 03:49 AM
Regular
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 59
If your main concern is dates can you explain your situation to the doctor that is prescribing your anxiety meds if you have one? Thats what happened to me, sort of. I have insurance but since I was neither pregnant or not pregnant (possible mscarriage) no new OB wants to touch me bc they see me as a liability. So that being said, I went to my internist who prescribes my anxiety meds and explained that I needed blood tests and he agreed to ordering them. HCG levels can give you a ballpark (usually) as to how far you may be. I am going to guess that out of pocket fees for blood tests should be cheaper than an ultrasound.....until you can figure out the rest.
Wishing you the best!
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  #20  
January 27th, 2011, 06:32 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 503
My anxiety meds are prescribed by a psychiatrist and not a PCP. I have an ultrasound to confirm the pg next week at one of those pro-life clinics. I just have to endure a bunch of Jesus talk for a little bit.
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