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i'm 17, hes 42- didnt know


Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #21  
March 30th, 2005, 07:57 AM
1proudmom2kalli
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I hope that helps! If it doesn't, let me know and I'll see what else I can find! I hope it works out for you dear!

But I still think that you should just talk to your mom and be straight with her, because she's your mom, and you only have one of those! Also, don't forget, she's going to find out EVENTUALLY.

BEST OF LUCK!
  #22  
March 30th, 2005, 07:58 AM
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I read up on the pages you gave me Krydiddy and looks like it really is MY choice with what i do about it. There is no problem with putting him on the b-c later on.
  #23  
March 30th, 2005, 08:14 AM
1proudmom2kalli
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Quote:
Originally posted by newmommie611@Mar 30 2005, 11:58 AM
I read up on the pages you gave me Krydiddy and looks like it really is MY choice with what i do about it. There is no problem with putting him on the b-c later on.
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Well, I'm glad they helped! Just let me know if I can help and I will certainly try!
  #24  
March 30th, 2005, 11:45 PM
Margaret
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Hi,

I didn't read all the responses you received so my apologies if this is repetitive.

First, there are no general laws on this situation. The law you are asking about is called "statutory rape" and the age of consent varies from state to state. Here is some information on the "age of consent" laws (scroll down for state listings).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_of_consent

Almost always, criminal charges are initiated by a minor's parents but it is very hard to prove and even harder to prosecute. If you are in a state where the age of consent is 17 or younger, then there has been no crime commited.

I'm sorry you are having to go through this. I imagine it is confusing and stressful. As easy as it is to say, try to not stress too much about this. Even if you didn't know his age, he did and his sister did. Look at your options and make the best choice for yourself and baby.

All the best,
Margaret
  #25  
March 31st, 2005, 06:57 AM
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I'd figure i'd add my two cents in. LOL.

You had no idea he was 42, he should have told you day 1, exp since he knew you were a minor. Also, honestly not knowing his age, I think she'll want to kick his butt more, for lying [as i'm sure she as respect for this guy, right?].

I don't think the hospital will report him for being 42, and you 17. Most of the time, age of consent laws come out in sexual abuse cases. I've never seen, anything, oh these two peopl are together one is over 18 and one isn't, he has to go to jail. Because obviously, your mom is consenting to you being with him [am I correct?], and so are you. But again that varries by state.

I can't believe his [daughter, right or sister, I forget], didn't tell you hey um...blah blah blah. I know I would.
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  #26  
March 31st, 2005, 12:10 PM
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Here in Arizona i'm sure the age is 18. At my doctors office i wrote down his age was 24 (BEFORE i found out) while she was examing me she asked if it was consent. i told her yes. i was completely willing to have sex with him. then she said "okay thats fine i just wanted to make sure" ----I DONT KNOW IF that would still be the same knowing hes 42

when my mom found out i was dating a 24y/o she was OK with it, when she found out i was pregnant she was mad but okay.
  #27  
March 31st, 2005, 12:15 PM
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In texas the legal consenting age is 17... but its all up to your parents i believe if it is to happen. The only thing that could happen to him is if your parents pressed charges against him. Your best bet is to sit down and talk to your parents make them realize that you dont want anything to happen to him. And then its all up to them.
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  #28  
March 31st, 2005, 12:49 PM
1proudmom2kalli
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Quote:
Originally posted by newmommie611@Mar 31 2005, 04:10 PM
Here in Arizona i'm sure the age is 18. At my doctors office i wrote down his age was 24 (BEFORE i found out) while she was examing me she asked if it was consent. i told her yes. i was completely willing to have sex with him. then she said "okay thats fine i just wanted to make sure" ----I DONT KNOW IF that would still be the same knowing hes 42

when my mom found out i was dating a 24y/o she was OK with it, when she found out i was pregnant she was mad but okay.
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Well, I think that if your doc asked you that she/he was probably just concerned about you and your well-being. Most good doctors are. Of course, if it was rape she would obviously like to know if she's concerned about your well-being, which it sounds to me like she is. I like my doctor, but I feel like sometimes he could be a little less concerned about my personal life and a little more concerned about mine & my baby's health instead of worrying about why we don't use condoms 100% of the time, but that's just my opinion.

Anyways, I don't think it would matter if he was 24 or 42 if you consented and told her that you consented. She probably just wanted to make sure that you weren't a rape victim or something like that.

Moms tend to freak out because they love you. Does he look like he's 24? I mean I have seen 42 year old MEN and they do not look like 24 year old GUYS! Odd... lol. But, really there's not much that your mom can do about your pregnancy now. I mean, you're pregnant, bottom line.

And if you need support that you are not getting from your mother, you can always come here and talk to us! ALWAYS!
  #29  
March 31st, 2005, 12:55 PM
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lol i know! yup he looks GREAT for his age. once i found out he was 42 i looked about him and said wow you look great. and he told me that everyone tells him he looks so young. he said he feels young.
  #30  
March 31st, 2005, 01:02 PM
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Popping in from Oct. DDC here.

My best friend had a baby when she was 15 by a 24 year old.Her mother didn't press charges on the father, but the state picked them up. He's now in prison for 10 years. I'm in Florida. I don't want to scare you or anything, just wanted to let you know what happened, that's all.

Hugs and prayers to you! You could always get a free consultation with a lawyer and find out for sure. There consulultations are confidential.
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  #31  
March 31st, 2005, 04:54 PM
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I'm sorry, but I honestly don't see how you can trust this man to be a father to your unborn child seeing he lied to you about his age. I wouldn't be as trusting as you are of him. If you don't have anything in writing saying that he is the father of your child then you have no future recourse in getting child support should he chose to move on & leave you, a teen with a baby. A 42 year old man having sex with a 17 year old girl is not a normal man, he must have issues with not being able to find a woman closer to his own age to relate to. If I were your mother, I would be very leery about this man & wouldn't trust him at all.

I hope things work out for you, but again I feel the need to tell you to be cautious with your relationship with this man who lied to you & chose to have sex with a minor knowing full well it was wrong.
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  #32  
March 31st, 2005, 07:03 PM
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