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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  • 1 Post By stressed70412

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  #1  
May 14th, 2012, 10:26 AM
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 46
My husband and I have been married for 5yrs in June. Throughout our marriage I have been the one that was not into the kid idea, while he has made it known through several conversations that he wants a baby. After being on the ring for months ends up I'm preggo. I tell him, ask him what he wants to do, he says lets have it. In that moment I agreed and came to terms with me becoming a mother.

The next day he finds out that he is being forced to get out of the military. He comes home and tells me that we shouldn't have this baby. After a weekend of arguing, trying to figure out where he's coming from and all that, today he tells me that if I have this kid he wants a divorce. I'm so confused; if this was coming from someone who never wanted kids I'd get it more. I'm having this kid regardless but dang this situation is crazy how do you go from nagging me about when are we gonna get pregnant to telling me to have an abortion or else. I just had to vent.
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  #2  
May 14th, 2012, 02:00 PM
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 4
Im sorry that you are going through this. Has anything else happened in your marriage prior to him having to leave the military? He may just be scared and panicking unsure of how he is going to support his family, though I thinks its very harsh to threaten you with divorce. I wish you the best of luck, and I sending a mental hug and good thoughts your way.
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  #3  
May 15th, 2012, 09:59 AM
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 9
I am sorry that you are having to face these challenges right now, KinkyCurly. I know that you are confused about what your husband is saying and needed to get this off your chest. I can see that you have bonded with this precious life you are carrying and looking forward to being a mom!

I do know how much it helps to share how you're feeling and hope you'll continue to reach out to others. Do you have anyone you can talk to in person? I know that from my time working with Focus on the Family that there are counselors who will talk to you over the phone for free. They're very kind and understanding and really want to help. You can call 1-855-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 a.m. and 8 p.m. (MT). Just a thought...

I will be praying!
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  #4  
May 15th, 2012, 10:38 AM
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 8
Hi Kinkycurly, I agree with the first post, when she said, he might just be scared of how he will be able to support his family. My husband is also on the military, if you don't want to reroll your family or friends what's going on, you can always go the brigade Chaplin. Its confidential and he can talk to both of you if you want.
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  #5  
May 15th, 2012, 01:04 PM
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 46
Quote:
Originally Posted by deniumchick View Post
I am sorry that you are having to face these challenges right now, KinkyCurly. I know that you are confused about what your husband is saying and needed to get this off your chest. I can see that you have bonded with this precious life you are carrying and looking forward to being a mom!

I do know how much it helps to share how you're feeling and hope you'll continue to reach out to others. Do you have anyone you can talk to in person? I know that from my time working with Focus on the Family that there are counselors who will talk to you over the phone for free. They're very kind and understanding and really want to help. You can call 1-855-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 a.m. and 8 p.m. (MT). Just a thought...

I will be praying!
Quote:
Originally Posted by mommy of almost 4 View Post
Hi Kinkycurly, I agree with the first post, when she said, he might just be scared of how he will be able to support his family. My husband is also on the military, if you don't want to reroll your family or friends what's going on, you can always go the brigade Chaplin. Its confidential and he can talk to both of you if you want.
Thanks for the prayers. I have been talking with my mom and my bestie about it. I just dunno how to handle him. The fact that he gave me an ultimatum about it is ridiculous especially when he says that if he stayed in the military he would want to have it. Mind you he is not the 'breadwinner' or anything our salary's are basically the same and we could survive on mine while he finds another job and we have basically 8mths or so to save up. He's out to sea for a week now so hopefully he gets some perspective on the situation because he's so not acting like the man I married. But regardless if he wants to go forward with the divorce because of this its on him. Our marriage has had its ups and downs but never have talked about divorce so this is shocking to me. I'm hoping he comes back with a change of heart but I am preparing if he doesn't. I feel like a week is enough time to examine a situation lol.
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