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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
May 26th, 2012, 06:51 AM
rjae84's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 308
I have a lovely 3 yr old boy that I raise soley. His father has never met him or been involved. I've been with a man off and on for the past yr. I found out I was pregnant. Currently 6 weeks. He left. I work full time but I don't have enough to raise my son and get everything he beds and wants. I don't qualify for any programs. I'm scared. Thebabys father is from Africa and I'm scared hell leave and not contribute financially. He's made plans to move out and was physically abusive to me before he left. I have had an ultrasound and just don't have any bond to this bby. He wasn't planned. I want an abortion but I'm scared. I want to find a dad for my son but I don't think anyone will want me if I have two kids. And I'm afraid of how ill be to this baby BC I don't want it... please offer advice. I have no family. No friends. No support. Is abortion best?
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  #2  
May 26th, 2012, 11:00 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Richlands NC
Posts: 3,348
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That is a question only you can answer. It has to be something you are ok with and something you can live with. I have never been in your situation but i was raising 2 kids basically on my own. Their dad didnt contribute much when he did contribute anything at all. Having 2 kids didn't prevent me from finding love. I did find someone, or rather he found me, and we have made a life together.At times it was more than difficult but the kids and I made it through.

I also wanted to address the bonding issue. With my 5th child I had some serious doubts about wanting to keep him, even though we tried to concieve and were thrilled to be pregnant. There came a point when I didn't want anything to do with it all. maybe that sounds horrible and I don't mean it to, i couldnt help how i felt and you cant help how you feel either. I considered giving the baby up and had a back up plan in place if that were to be the course of action I took after he was born. However, I am relieved and happy to say that the second he was born I fell in love with hm and all the heartache and worry was gone in an instant.

I know nothing I have said is probably going to help you, as I have already stated our situations were a bit different but I thought you needed to know that things CAN turn out all right even when you think they are so far from it they won't. I needed you to know you aren't alone and that someone is 'listening'
Good Luck with whatever you decided to do. I hope the answers come quickly and you won't have this on your shoulders for long.
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  #3  
May 26th, 2012, 05:32 PM
Newbie
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 5
hey I think I'm pregnant for a guy I'm been dealing with off and on for a bit over a year. He doesn't know and I'm not really sure but all the signs led to pregnancy 25dpoand 5 days late two negative test a set of 11 year old twins and I don't have a job. If i tell him he may try and get me to keep it and move in and all that stuff, Idon't know if I'm ready
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