Log In Sign Up

Paternity question?


Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Like Tree2Likes
  • 1 Post By terryterry
  • 1 Post By LuvRBx5

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Unplanned Pregnancy LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
August 8th, 2012, 08:02 AM
Newbie
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: New York city
Posts: 7
Im pretty embarrassed to even have to question who the father of my baby is but I recently found out I'm pregnant (not sure how many weeks yet, I go for a sonogram later this week). I have a boyfriend who I regularly sleep with but I messed up and slept with my ex on july 18 and on July 30 I took a test and got a positive pregnancy test. I'm fairly certain my boyfriend is the father but I'm scared there is a chance he isn't, what do you think? Thanks in advance for any help!!!*
Reply With Quote
  #2  
August 8th, 2012, 08:54 AM
terryterry's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Northern California
Posts: 652
First off, no judgement here. I was pretty sure I knew too, but I had to have the doctor confirm the dates for me to be sure.

I think for now I would make sure to mention it to your doctor, because they can do an early ultrasound to check on the development of the pregnancy. They can give you an estimated conception date, and if it's near the time that you slept with your ex then you'll probably have to wait until after the birth to be sure (unless you have other testing that might sort things out).
Reply With Quote
  #3  
August 8th, 2012, 11:56 AM
Newbie
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: New York city
Posts: 7
Thanks! I hate not knowing its killing me
Reply With Quote
  #4  
August 8th, 2012, 09:20 PM
terryterry's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Northern California
Posts: 652
Good luck, I hope the father is who you want it to be. Keep us posted
mommy_to_nico likes this.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
August 9th, 2012, 06:42 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: long island, ny
Posts: 1,247
this hits close to home...i had this happen to me 9 yrs ago and i felt the same way. i hope everything works out.
__________________




Reply With Quote
  #6  
August 9th, 2012, 12:33 PM
Leogirl's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,163
If you know your dates pretty good you can estamate what day you could have conceaved yourself. Your Dr will be able to fill you in with a more accurate answer after an ultrasound. There is a new blood test out that can be used to establish paternity as soon as 10 weeks (if I remember correctly) but I don't think it's widely available yet. So odds are you will have to wait until the baby is born to establish paternity for sure.
__________________



Reply With Quote
  #7  
August 9th, 2012, 07:14 PM
LuvRBx5's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,427
If it's within 2 weeks of each other, the only way to know for sure might be paternity test since u/s can be off up to 2 weeks either way..

No judgement here.
Hokie Nicole likes this.
__________________
Thanks to *Sharon* for the siggy <3
Reply With Quote
  #8  
August 10th, 2012, 09:39 AM
Newbie
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: New York city
Posts: 7
So today I got an ultrasound. I was so nervous to find out how far along I was but the baby is only 6 weeks so it could be either my ex or my boyfriends...I'm so upset I don't really know what to do now.

and I wanted to thank you for your comments! It's nice not to feel so alone!
Reply With Quote
  #9  
August 10th, 2012, 10:09 AM
terryterry's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Northern California
Posts: 652
I'm so sorry that you didn't get more definitive results
These questions might be too personal, so it's perfectly fine if you don't want to answer...
Will you be able to tell the baby's father when it is born (my PC way of asking if the ethnicities/physical characteristics of the potential fathers are different)?
Have you told either of the them that you're pregnant yet?
If it turns out the that baby's father is _______? Would he step up and be a good dad? Would you want to be with him?
Reply With Quote
  #10  
August 10th, 2012, 11:28 AM
Newbie
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: New York city
Posts: 7
My boyfriend is so excited to be a dad, even though we have only been dating like 2 months! He doesn't know I am uncertain about him being the dad...But my ex, who is also my best friend, knows about the baby and does not want a child and would not be there for the kid. This sucks so much, I want it to be my boyfriends so badly but it's my fault I'm in this situation in the first place. I'm not sure what I'm going to do but I feel like maybe I won't keep it. I have a lot to consider.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
August 10th, 2012, 12:13 PM
Newbie
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: New York city
Posts: 7
So I've been playing with online conception date calculators and they are telling me I conceived around July 12. I'm hoping this is right, I'm going to go talk with my doctor Monday to see if she can help me at all!
Reply With Quote
  #12  
August 15th, 2012, 01:39 PM
colette20's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Minneapolis, MN
Posts: 1,610
HI honey

I am in the same situation. And it is so hard to not know. We have a good idea of who dad is, based on dating, but because every woman is different and you can never truly know when you ovulated, the only thing to do is a paternity test. There is a blood test than can be done by the ddc company but it is $1600... So the only way you'll truly know is a dna test after the baby comes....

Like I said our situations mirror each other... my ex doesnt want to stick around, doesnt want to know anything about the pregnancy, and the other man wants this kid to his more than anything, and has said he doesnt care who the dad is, he wants to be around for him.

I won't lie, its been hard dealing with the paternity issue... but every baby is a blessing and thats what to stay focused on, growing that healthy baby

Feel free to message me if you'd ever like to talk.

Best of luck honey
__________________
*Nikki*






Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:26 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0