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I think I am pregnant from a one night stand...


Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  • 3 Post By HorseGal
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  #1  
September 23rd, 2013, 11:53 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 1
So, I have not yet taken a pregnancy test but I have already had this gut feeling for the past week that I am pregnant. I just turned 24 and recently broke up with my long time boyfriend a month and a half ago. I was pregnant at 18 but had an abortion, I often think of what would have been had I gone through with the pregnancy.
Anyways, I am feeling the same feelings and body changes as I felt in that first month again. I have been on birth control but in the past two months had a couple days where I missed it and would end up taking two at a time. A little over a month ago, I had a one night stand, on that day and the day before I had forgotten to take my birth control. A couple days after me and my ex did have sex as well. I thought I got my period right after but it was much lighter than usual and didn't last long. I should be starting my period today or in the next couple of days but I don't think I will. I am too afraid of confirming my thoughts that I am pregnant.
My body this last week has felt a change that I can contribute to anything else, my breasts are significantly larger than they normally would be before my period, they are very tender, I have terrible cramps, a slightly bigger belly, I feel nauseous, dizzy, weak, tired and unbelievably emotional. All I keep thinking about is what to do if the test is positive, it's all I can think about. I work full time and go to school full time and I can barely focus. I am so incredibly scared as to what to do if I am pregnant. How would I tell my ex that I can't be for sure that it is his, that it might be some random guy who I haven't spoken a word to since? If I am pregnant I don't think I could have an abortion again, but then how do I go an entire 9 months without knowing who the father is? What happens if I am pregnant? Do I tell the guy I had a one night stand with that he MIGHT be the father? Do I tell my ex theres a CHANCE that he might NOT be the father? I feel like I've made such a terrible decision and what if I have the child of a person I don't even know?
I know all of this is kind of crazy talk since I haven't yet taken the test, I just don't know how to deal with this. I don't know if there is anybody I can talk to.
Has anyone else gotten pregnant from a one night stand? Could you please tell me what you did? Or if you weren't positive on who the father was, how do you handle that?
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  #2  
September 24th, 2013, 03:15 AM
HorseGal's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Kansas
Posts: 4,719
You can "what if" this situation to death, but you need to test. That is step 1 no matter how you look at it. And also, if you are only using BC pills as birth control for a one night stand then you need to see your dr either way and get checked for STD's and even to confirm a pregnancy.

If you are pregnant then you go from there. Are you going to have to be open and honest with the two men involved. Yes, you should. And it is my understanding that you can determine paternity prior to the birth of the child.

I know this feels like alot but you need to take this situation in bite size pieces. First bite being taking a pregnancy test. Sometimes these things take flight in our minds and make us see or feel things that aren't real. Same is true for someone even trying to concieve.

The last piece of advice I can offer is to please think long term in this situation. Pregnant or not, you need to stop putting yourself in these situations. It's dangerous and never leads to good things. If you are pregnant, think long term about having a child in your life. No child is unwanted, even if you don't think your ready, there are many many loving families out there who are.

Good luck and I hope this situation turns out for the best for you.
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  #3  
October 3rd, 2013, 09:55 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Florida
Posts: 4,083
Im glad I found this post...

Thats how I met my daughters father - who became my fiance and now my enemy (but thats neither here nor there). I had broken up with my boyfriend of a year the month prior, got crazy and slept with a random guy from a club and out came my daughter. I did know that my daughter was definitely not my ex's but I didnt know if my daughter was the guy I hooked up with. He meant nothing to me at the time so I told him that I got a positive test, you can have a DNA test while your pregnant and we had one he was 99.999% the father so I knew it wasnt anyone else.

You need to ease your mind and step one find out if your pregnant. There is no harm in knowing. I would approach the guy you hooked up with about it before approaching my ex. Get him to do a DNA test and find out - if its not his you know and you can approach your ex.

I know my post was all over the place but I have been there! Im thinking about you!
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  #4  
October 3rd, 2013, 10:04 AM
ducksaresnazzy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: new york
Posts: 2,349
i don't know anything about dealing with paternity issues (my boyfriend is the only person i've ever slept with) but i do know about unplanned pregnancies. i'm currently 8 months into one. if you ever want to talk about that, you can message me.
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