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Worry Wednesdays


Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
October 17th, 2006, 09:38 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Winnipeg
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K so I know it's not technically wednesday here yet, but it is for some of you ladies in a different time zone than me, so I'll start this thread now.

K well, right now I'm worried about the big question "will we have more kids"...Right now we both agree that we don't want anymore...ever! Not because we don't like children, not because we don't think we could love another child as much as Fiona...mostly just for selfish reasons, like just wanting our adult lives back...I don't really want to go through another pregnancy...I'm mean, we barely dated before getting preggers in the first place. We'd like to be able to have some time to date again but with a baby it's near impossible. And to boot, if we were to have another one, it wouldn't be for another 5 years, and by that time, Fiona will be 5 and in school and WHY would we want to do the baby thing again? The midnight, 3am and 5am feedings, the dirty diapers, the crying...And we know that since we lucked out hard core with Fiona being such a great baby, our chances of having another good one like her are pretty unlikely! So I worry that a second baby will be a really high maintenance one! lol
To contradict all this, I really would like Fiona to have a sibling and I know I could love another child like I love her. I know IF it happened, I'd be ok. But to go out and PLAN it, I don't think so! lol Another thing is that I'm opening up a daycare in my home so I can stay at home with Fiona, and if I have a second child, it would take away from the amount of children I'm allowed in my daycare and that means I wouldn't be making a decent income to support two kids! (The laws where I am states that I can only have 4 children in my daycare including my own children under 12! so I'd only be allowed 2 other kids if I was to have another one!!! UGH!)
So really, my true worry is...What if I get pregnant again! I'm so scared to have another unplanned pregnancy! I was ok with one, but another! argh! I'd be so worried and I don't know if I'd be able to truly enjoy the second pregnancy. Mitch and I agreed that if in 5 years we manage to avoid getting preggers, he'll get snipped...but a lot can happen in 5 yrs!!! 5 years couldn't come soon enough! lol
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  #2  
October 17th, 2006, 11:22 PM
LondonAndAthensMommy's Avatar Chillin' in Mommywood ;)
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Kelowna, BC
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I didn't want kids this young, but its happening... so i think i want another baby when this one turns 3 then i will be done.... but yah i hate the lifestyle i have to live while being pregnant lol i can't even imagine with a baby yet
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  #3  
October 18th, 2006, 02:28 AM
Pharry's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Johannesburg, South Africa
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I want a baby so much, though I worry that people will start talking that i have not given myself enough time to grieve for my angel, so I am just taking a bit of time off thinking of having a baby. i wish that I could have a baby soon.
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  #4  
October 18th, 2006, 06:01 AM
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Join Date: May 2006
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Quote:
I want a baby so much, though I worry that people will start talking that i have not given myself enough time to grieve for my angel, so I am just taking a bit of time off thinking of having a baby. i wish that I could have a baby soon.[/b]
I'm sorry sweetie...And you alone know when the time is right to try again, don't worry about what other people say!

Brig I know what you mean...I am soooo terrified of having another unplanned pregnancy. I am just scared that I will get pregnant and be alone again...and I don't want that. Also, I know that whoever I have another baby with has to be the person I spend the rest of my life with. I'm so terrified of having another baby, then breaking up with the father and having two babies by two different fathers because who is going to want me then? I mean...I know that girls in that position do find love, shoot one of my friends has 4 kids by 3 different fathers and she is getting married in a couple months! But I'm unlucky in love as it is...the last thing I need is another strike against me. And I want it to be when I'm done with school and have a really good income, at least enough so that I can be a SAHM for the first year. As much as I would love a sibling for Mattea...I'm gonna wait a while. I think 5 years is a good amount of time. I definately want more kids, I've always wanted 3, but I want to make sure that next time I do things the "right" way...
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  #5  
October 18th, 2006, 07:45 AM
*Cassie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Fredericton, New Brunswick, Canada
Posts: 18,780
Right now, I'm also worried about the 'what if' I get pregnant again? I always thought I wanted two or three kids, but now I don't think I want another. At least not for quite awhile. And like you said Brig, after so many years why would we want to do the baby thing again with a small child? I'm worried I would have another really hard labor/delivery again. Of course, since I had a c/s I could choose to just schedule one, but my recovery hasn't been really easy so I don't know which option I would opt for. I'm scared that if we end up pregnant again, it will be too much for him and Dale will leave me.

Why must we think of all the what if's? I could go on much longer but I won't...haha.
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  #6  
October 18th, 2006, 09:44 AM
irishxrose
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Hon, I totally know what you mean, although I'm the one that really wants more kids (baby fever SUCKS!), and Jason only wants one more (he wants a girl). But we're waiting like you for a few years, and Jason is debating whether or not he even wants another one. It's a hard decision to make. I worry that I'll have another horrible labor and delivery; I worry that I'll have PPD again; I'm just a worry wart I guess.



You do what you feel is right hun. Alot can change in 5 years.
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