Log In Sign Up

New and need to rant


Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Unplanned Pregnancy LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
March 30th, 2007, 02:48 AM
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Calgary, AB
Posts: 10
Hi, my name is Brittany, I am 21 in 19 days, and I am 10 weeks pregnant.

I am happy about this pregnancy but almost everyone around me who knows, thinks I should just get an abortion. I only have three people being supportive and two of them don't like in the same proviance as me. The father-to-be doesn't want it at all. He says he "loves" me but he won't support MY decision. He'll support me if I went and had an abortion, but I can't and won't do it again, it was too painful and heartbreaking. I just told my dad and he thinks I should abort it too because I'll be "stupid" if I don't. They all think its going to completely ruin my life and my boyfriend thinks that he won't be able to go back to school and everything.
I know he'll be able too, I know I'll be able to when the time comes for it. He won't talk to me or even look at me because I have choice to keep this baby. I don't really know what to do. I am stressed and just need people to talk to who have been through this and are going through this.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #2  
March 30th, 2007, 03:43 AM
Chellybella's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 5,920
I'm sorry you have no support but glad you have stuck with your decision. My BF wanted me to abort or give the baby up for adoption too and I stuck with my guns. I knew I wanted the baby even if he/she was unplanned. He is slowly coming around now that he knows I am serious. Don't let anyone talk you into doing something you don't want to do.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #3  
March 30th, 2007, 04:18 AM
first_time_mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: ireland
Posts: 5,136
i'm so sorry to hear that everyone is putting pressure on you, but i can guarantee that they will all come around! they just need to get used to the idea that you're gonna be a mommy. and when they do they can get excited about it!

I'm 20 so i know exactly what its like to be so young and everyone thinking that you cant do it. but i promise you can!

i hope you stick around the board, the ladies here can give you support you badly need. we've all been in the same postition.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!
__________________
<div align="center">
[/url]</div>

Robyn, wife to Steven, mom to Jake (7th Aug 2007)
Reply With Quote
  #4  
March 30th, 2007, 04:29 AM
*Fiona*
Guest
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Don't let anyone talk you into doing something you don't want to do.[/b]
Totally agree with this statement. No one can force you to do something. As you said, it's your decision, and people either support you or butt out!

Sorry to be so forward
Reply With Quote
  #5  
March 30th, 2007, 10:29 AM
Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Alberta Canada
Posts: 290
no one can tell you what to do, well no one should assume that they can. Im 18 i was 17 when i got pregnant and the father was pushing abortion on me so bad... he would tell me that i will get fat if i keep it, i wont be able to go to school, his parents want me to... pretty much anything he could think of. I was gonna do it too but the day before my appointment i chickened out and im so glad i did... now im due in 7 weeks and hes finally comming around... hes started to ask me questions about him but very very suttle questions lol

My advice is do what you think is right... school can wait, and everything can wait... if you dont want an abortion by all means dont do it!
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #6  
March 30th, 2007, 01:37 PM
skyj03's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Orange City, FL
Posts: 3,329
I am sorry for your situation..with my first pregnancy I was 18 when I got pregnant. My BF accepted my decsion to keep the baby but my parents wanted me to abort it but I didn't cuse I could never do that. Eventually my parents came around and they love there granddaughter..they weren't so thrilled about this pregnancy either but they know how I feel and they know they will love the baby anyway
So don't let people put you down..u made a good choice not to get rid of the baby..I bet the dad will come around and if he doesn't he will just be missing out on how wonderful it is to be a parent. I hope everything works out hun.
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #7  
March 30th, 2007, 03:52 PM
the_elmel's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Texas
Posts: 13,904
Send a message via AIM to the_elmel Send a message via Yahoo to the_elmel
I'm so sorry for your situation! I think a lot of us can relate to that. You'll find lots of support here. I'm sure your friends/family/boyfriend will begin coming around after time. The most important thing is to not let anyone make this decision for you. You make it. I hope things work out for you!
__________________
<div align="center">

</div>
Reply With Quote
  #8  
March 30th, 2007, 05:03 PM
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Calgary, AB
Posts: 10
Thank you, I am sure I will stick around

I am hoping he comes around, in the next few months. I hope he realizes he can still do what he wants to do. He won't even be around the baby after its born, unless I can convince him to come and move in to a place when I find it.
Each day I am happy I didn't do something I'd regret. I love watching my belly, very slowly grow, hahah.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #9  
March 31st, 2007, 09:18 AM
first_time_mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: ireland
Posts: 5,136
your boyfriend will come round. many of the ladies had the same problem with the fathers but they always got really excited about it once they got used to the idea. they're men after all and dont think the same as us!
__________________
<div align="center">
[/url]</div>

Robyn, wife to Steven, mom to Jake (7th Aug 2007)
Reply With Quote
  #10  
April 2nd, 2007, 07:47 PM
Tikka's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Manitoba Canada
Posts: 1,505
Welcome! It's always good to see another canuk!

When I was 18 I had an unplanned pregnancy. My BF and his brother were adament that the pregnancy be terminated, and even though deep down that was not what I wanted, I went along and had an abortion.

The aftermath was really bad and I plumented into a severe depression that lasted for several years. To be honest, I don't think that I ever really got over it 100%.

Just wanted to share my story with you and to implore you to stick to your guns whatever it is that you decide.

Best of luck and welcome again!
__________________

Reply With Quote
  #11  
April 2nd, 2007, 09:14 PM
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Calgary, AB
Posts: 10
I am 100% sticking to my decision. As the days go on, I get more excited and just hope my BF starts to accept the idea and hopefully will move out with me, haha.

The only thing that is putting me down is being between jobs, and looking at places to rent in the near future, that allow kids and is under $900 a month, hah. I probably have to live downtown, which ugh, I don't want to do, hahah.

I know everything will work out though I am trying to stay as positive as I can.


Update:
My BF is trying to avoid me and insists that I am going to ###### his life up. He isn't going to warm up to the idea at all. All he does is work, play video games and drinks.
I really am torn on what to do
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #12  
April 3rd, 2007, 05:27 AM
sarabella
Guest
Posts: n/a
Then you do what is best for you and the baby and you do it on your own. If he doesn't want to be part of that child's life, it's HIS mistake and HIM messing up his life, not YOU.

Somehow us women seem to find an inner strength we didn't know we possessed when we are pregnant.

You'll do the right thing, I have faith in you and so will your baby.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
April 3rd, 2007, 07:23 AM
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Calgary, AB
Posts: 10
I wish I could just pack up and leave him, but I need to get a job and save the money to even afford my own place. That aside, I don't understand how he can say he "cares" about me, but is avoiding me and won't talk to me and just drink away his "problems". Telling me that it will distroy HIS life. I wish I had a choice of being in this enviroment or not.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #14  
April 3rd, 2007, 07:46 AM
sarabella
Guest
Posts: n/a
Where is your family in all of this?
Reply With Quote
  #15  
April 3rd, 2007, 08:36 PM
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Calgary, AB
Posts: 10
Well my dad is telling me to get an abortion...So I haven't talked to him in awhile because I'm not allowed to stay at his place no matter what, due to his GF and me not getting along too well.
My mom isn't in the picture anymore and my aunt is the only other person in my family who knows, and she is being supportive, but I don't get time to talk to her.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #16  
April 4th, 2007, 05:35 AM
sarabella
Guest
Posts: n/a
Could you go stay with your aunt until you get your feet on the ground?
Reply With Quote
  #17  
April 4th, 2007, 06:38 AM
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Calgary, AB
Posts: 10
I highly doubt it. Not without having to pay her more than I have to pay for rent right now.

Worst comes to worst I will have to go and rent a room from some random person till I get money together, but I am hoping that it doesn't happen.

My BF keeps doing mind games too. The avoiding me, then at the same time he wants to be with me and all that...I am still going to give him more time, but I am going to act like I am on my own and do everything without him till he steps up and actually tells me what he wants with the relationship and child.

I can't wait till I get a job again, hah. Kitchen work is not going to be fun with a pregnancy, ha.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #18  
April 4th, 2007, 09:18 AM
lvfunandfit's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,020
You are a very strong girl!! You stick to your guns and do what is best for you and your baby. Your dad will come around for sure! And I'm sure your bf will also.
__________________
~LeighAnne~

Check out Danika's website!


<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/w4pQs8L/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">

</a>
Reply With Quote
  #19  
April 4th, 2007, 06:56 PM
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Calgary, AB
Posts: 10
Even though it's been two days since my BF told me that he's avoiding me. He has done a few SMALL things to show that he does care and still wants things to work. I guess me and him both need to watch what we say sometimes, haha.

Guys should become pregnant and see how they like what we have to go through
__________________
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:08 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0