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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
April 18th, 2007, 02:29 AM
waitin4ansleigh's Avatar Super Mommy
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So I can't sleep because this is on my mind...

My baby's sperm donor wanted to sign over rights.. he told me that his mom was gonna go after me for grandparent custody... he got a lawyer and this lawyer told me that if he signed away his rights (even tho the 5 lawyers I talked to say he couldn't sign over rights this early, that a judge would never allow it) that his mom couldn't do anything... because her rights came from him... So I signed the papers even though I knew it was a bad idea... 2 weeks past, Jeff hadn't paid the lawyer... So Friday I called and requested that my name be removed from those papers... that I wanted nothing to do with it any longer... well Monday I called and the lawyer was out of the office... I mentioned it again... well today I call to make sure that its been done and the assistant tells me that the papers have been filed and that the lawyer is not my lawyer she's Jeff's so she can't talk to me... WHAT THE HELL!!! I don't know what has been filed... I mean I don't think she can file the papers I said I didn't want her to file anymore... Furthermore this lawyer claims that neither Jeff nor I have to go to court for this... when all the lawyers I talked to said that we would both have to go even if it was uncontested... This assistant seemed to know the whole case and problem without even looking it up... and there are 3 other lawyers that work in this law firm... Not to mention I believe that Jeff's girlfriend knows someone up there... Like they are related or something...

I feel like I'm getting screwed here... I don't know what to do... I don't have the money to go get a lawyer and it costs $100 just to talk to a lawyer about this problem because of its complexity... I can sit back and wait... Or I can just file for the child support anyway... I just don't understand why 4 days ago she was talking to me telling me that i needed to press him about paying and then now she's can't talk to me anymore...

I've just been overly frustrated abotu this whole issue... I knew i was getting screwed over and there was nothign I could do about it... I've foudn myslef wishing more and more that kharma will really REALLY bite him in the tail end if you catch my drift... Just so ya'll know... he wants to sign over his rights because he's getting married to a girl he's known since new years who is unemployeed and has a 5 y/o son that he would rather raise than his own child... And the whole situation is seriously making me sick...

Thanks for letting me vent...
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  #2  
April 18th, 2007, 02:34 AM
the_elmel's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Oh wow. This whole situation sounds like such a mess! I don't really know what to tell you since I'm not a lawyer. You might be able to find a state lawyer that is willing to take on your case for free. You might also be able to have a free phone consultation. I know some law firms offer that, regardless of whether you talk for an hour or more. I hope everything works out. Do you have family nearby to turn to?
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  #3  
April 18th, 2007, 02:44 AM
waitin4ansleigh's Avatar Super Mommy
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my family is pretty much worthless.. I live with my parents now cause I have to.. but trust me as soon as things get better (and I'm not on maternity leave) I am so gone! and this whole thing is a mess and then some... the sperm donor is such a well I can't sum it up in one word but they all might work: selfish, inconsiderate, greedy, lying, stupid jerk... so he's willing to put me thru more hell... considering hes the one that planned our pregnancy without telling me first you would think he would want his kid..
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  #4  
April 18th, 2007, 06:24 AM
sarabella
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I'm pretty sure the state has some sort of legal assistance for mother's who can't afford.

When my sister went after her exbf for child support, she didn't pay for her lawyer, it was appointed to her.

Might want to just check into that and find out.
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  #5  
April 18th, 2007, 06:24 AM
first_time_mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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i cant believe that he's being like that.

is it possible to get some free legal aid? i really know nothing about how these things work in the states.

i really hope things get better soon, he's such a dick!
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Robyn, wife to Steven, mom to Jake (7th Aug 2007)
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  #6  
April 18th, 2007, 11:12 AM
littleln's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Erm, if you already signed the papers allowing him to give up paternity then thats it. If he waived his rights and you let him (which it sounds like you inadvertantly did) then you cannot get a dime from him. Sounds like this whole "my mother is going to come after the baby, but if you let me sign over my rights" thing was a scam to get out of paying child support. I could have misunderstood, but if everything you said is true, you can't get any child support.
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  #7  
April 18th, 2007, 11:21 AM
sarabella
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As far as I would think, if he, as the father, has no rights, his mother certainly doesn't.
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  #8  
April 18th, 2007, 12:35 PM
first_time_mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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do you want child support beth? or do you just want him outta your life?
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Robyn, wife to Steven, mom to Jake (7th Aug 2007)
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  #9  
April 18th, 2007, 04:04 PM
waitin4ansleigh's Avatar Super Mommy
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Quote:
Erm, if you already signed the papers allowing him to give up paternity then thats it. If he waived his rights and you let him (which it sounds like you inadvertantly did) then you cannot get a dime from him. Sounds like this whole "my mother is going to come after the baby, but if you let me sign over my rights" thing was a scam to get out of paying child support. I could have misunderstood, but if everything you said is true, you can't get any child support.[/b]
Yes but I told them I wanted my name off those papers... Because I realized what was going on... and the lawyer filed them anyway... but like I said I was told he wouldn't be able to sign over rights for the first year of the childs life so we will just have to hope the judge says no...

and if he won't get out of our lives I want child support... everything with him is a scam... i don't think hes really gonna sign over his rights for the simple fact that he's all over the idea that I'll let him see carson which I'm not gonna... I don't know... its all a scam with him and I don't knwo heads or tails of it...
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  #10  
April 18th, 2007, 11:11 PM
AngelFire22's Avatar Super Mommy
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I'm sorry everything is going so crappy for you! Hopefully things work out an you'll be able to get something from him. So what happens now?
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  #11  
April 19th, 2007, 05:16 AM
waitin4ansleigh's Avatar Super Mommy
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Quote:
I'm sorry everything is going so crappy for you! Hopefully things work out an you'll be able to get something from him. So what happens now?[/b]
I don't know... I guess I just have to wait and see if it goes thru or if there's a court date or whatever.... If I have'nt heard anything by the time I get Carson' BC and SSC then I'm filing for child support just to get an answer... But they should have to mail me papers I believe... I'm not sure... It could have to go to court and he never tells me but I don't know... I have no way to find out what has been filed and what hasn't...
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  #12  
April 19th, 2007, 05:23 AM
first_time_mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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can you not go down to the local court and view any documents that have been filed against you? seems like a pretty basic data protection right.
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Robyn, wife to Steven, mom to Jake (7th Aug 2007)
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  #13  
April 19th, 2007, 09:34 AM
Husher's Avatar B & E complete me.
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Just popping in from the October DDC and I wanted to give you some help. I am a paralegal and I work in a law firm so I know a little about how all this works. If you signed those papers they may very well be allowed by the judge but you may still have some options. Did you speak to an attorney at all (other than his) before signing? Did his attorney ask you if you had spoken to an attorney? Did he ask you if you understood what you were signing?

If your income is below a certain level you will be eligible for free legal aid in Georgia. Check out this website to find legal aid near you and give one of the attorneys a call to see if you are eligible.

http://www.legalaid-ga.org/GA/StateChannel.../53/bAllState/0

Also, you can go down to the local courthouse and view any filings you want. You already know the attorney's name and you know both the parties names (you and the father) so all you have to do is go and ask someone where those documents would be filed and someone there will point you in the right direction. PM me if you have any more questions. I'll try to help all I can.

Good luck to you!
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