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Raped and Pregnant


Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
May 14th, 2007, 07:17 PM
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I am pregnant because of rape, so I am finding it difficult to care about this pregnancy. Is there anyone that can relate to this?
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  #2  
May 14th, 2007, 07:32 PM
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I'm sorry I can't relate to this and I don't really have any advice for you. Do you mind if I ask how that happend? I thought they always gave rape victims that emergency contraceptive pill--the one that prevents pregnancy? I'm sorry, I can imagine you are probably going through a lot right now. HUGS!! I wish I had some better advice for you.
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  #3  
May 14th, 2007, 10:06 PM
Tikka's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Oh my gosh, I am so sorry that you had to endure what was a very horrible experience. I wish I had some sage advice for you, maybe one of the other ladies here can relate to your situation

Stay strong
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  #4  
May 14th, 2007, 10:37 PM
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Quote:
I'm sorry I can't relate to this and I don't really have any advice for you. Do you mind if I ask how that happend? I thought they always gave rape victims that emergency contraceptive pill--the one that prevents pregnancy? I'm sorry, I can imagine you are probably going through a lot right now. HUGS!! I wish I had some better advice for you.[/b]
They give it but you don't have to take it... and if you don't go to the hospital... well... yeah...

I won't pretend to know what you're going through, or your circumstances... I was raped once and almost date-raped another time... but I didn't get pregnant. I would think it's a mixed blessing... I wish all the best for you, and that things work out alright...
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  #5  
May 15th, 2007, 12:10 AM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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((((((((((((brokenheartblessing))))))))))

I can't relate, I've never been raped - but just wanted to let you know I care. It's probably normal to feel disconnected about the pregnancy, but try to remember that your precious baby is an innocent victim of this horrible act of violence too. She didn't ask to be brought into existance through violence or to be fathered by a rapist, but here she is - and you are all she's got. One day not too long from now, you will be able to look into her eyes (maybe they will be just like your eyes), and see that she is forever hurt by this man too. Nothing excuses what he did to you, NOTHING. But your baby needs you, no matter how she got here. Hang in there!
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  #6  
May 15th, 2007, 02:28 AM
yammie
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It is your choice 100% on what you do
it is completely understandable that you would feel so far from this baby
but remember this baby is half of you too

but again it's your choice
if you have chosen to let the baby live but feel as though you cannot be apart of it's life adoption is a great choice. Another family can love her and she will never have to know how she was made.

Or you can raise her she is half you and would be so lucky to have you. Either way abortion or letting the baby live is up to you. The circumstances in which she was made are terrible but she can still have a wonderful life.
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  #7  
May 15th, 2007, 03:00 AM
sarabella
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I've been raped but no pregnancy came out of it. As it is, many years later, I'm just now dealing with the emotions of the rape.


All I can tell you is do what your heart tells you too. You'll know inside what the right thing to do is. If you feel it's, abortion, no one will judge you, especially with what you've gone through. If that's not an option for you, as it wasn't for me with this unplanned pregnancy, there is also adoption if you feel that you won't be able to love your child or look at her/him without remembering where she came from. Or you could keep him/her and raise them as your own.

I would suggest going to a rape counselor and discussing it. They are very good at what they do and you aren't alone.... this has happened to other women before. They will be able to help you.
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  #8  
May 15th, 2007, 05:30 AM
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I was raped by my ex BF. We had been apart for several mos. I never told anyone, that is how I didn't get the morning after pill (I continued to menstruate the first 2 mos So I didn't even realise I was pregnant). I was just starting to get over it when I found out. Only my Dad knows how it happened. I have every intention of keeping this baby. It's just hard to see the big picture through the haze. I am hoping that once the baby comes this will get better. I am going in for an ultrasound on thursday. I'll probably get to see the sex of the baby.
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  #9  
May 15th, 2007, 05:33 AM
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i am so sorry to hear what you're going thru, i cant even begin to imagine how hard it must be.

but your baby is still a baby, no matter what. If you think you'd end up resenting her then perhaps it might be better to consider abortion or adoption.
With adoption the baby gets the life it deserves as an innocent victim of a horrific act and you get to get on with your life.

you say you cant bond with the baby, can i ask how far along you are? because most of us didnt bond with our unplanned babies straight away. maybe take some time and see a rape councillor?

i really wish i had some better advice for you.



Quote:
I have every intention of keeping this baby. It's just hard to see the big picture through the haze. I am hoping that once the baby comes this will get better. I am going in for an ultrasound on thursday. I'll probably get to see the sex of the baby. [/b]
i really hope the ultrasound helps you bond. you've been thru such an ordeal, you deserve a bit of happiness. knowing the sex of the baby has really helped me bond. i call her Rebecca and now she seems like more of a person instead of this little thing growing inside me.

i hope you stick around, the ladies here are amazing.
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Robyn, wife to Steven, mom to Jake (7th Aug 2007)
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  #10  
May 15th, 2007, 05:42 AM
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you say you cant bond with the baby, can i ask how far along you are? because most of us didnt bond with our unplanned babies straight away.[/b]
I am 19 wks along. I am due Oct 8. This is my first pregnancy (I am 25) I hadjust always hoped my children would have 2 loving parents. I only had one, and I wasn't unloved, but there was always something missing.
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  #11  
May 15th, 2007, 06:42 AM
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you're 25, you wont always be alone. you'll meet a man who wont treat you as badly as that evil man. and will accept your baby as part of you.

have you joined the Oct DDC? those ladies are great and its fun to talk to women who are due the same time as you. they know how you're feeling.
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Robyn, wife to Steven, mom to Jake (7th Aug 2007)
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  #12  
May 15th, 2007, 07:56 PM
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you're 25, you wont always be alone. you'll meet a man who wont treat you as badly as that evil man. and will accept your baby as part of you.[/b]
It is true, you will meet a wonderful man who loves you and your child and will treat him/her as though they were their own. My SO is like that with my daughter, it is very sweet.
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  #13  
May 15th, 2007, 08:55 PM
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Thank you gals for your support. I guess I will take it one step at a time. Can't change anything that allready happened right? Isn't there a bible verse about God not giving us more than we can handle? this will get better (Hopefully)
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  #14  
May 15th, 2007, 09:47 PM
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This happened for a reason and i am sure you will be just fine.
Good luck with everything!

Hope you stick around.
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  #15  
May 16th, 2007, 04:40 AM
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it'll be a challenge, but i know you'll do great.
hope you stick around, the ladies on JM are so fantastic.

how has your pregnancy been going in general? you feeling ok?
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Robyn, wife to Steven, mom to Jake (7th Aug 2007)
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  #16  
May 16th, 2007, 04:42 AM
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Yeah everthing is going good. My back feel just awful though. That is normal though right?
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  #17  
May 16th, 2007, 05:07 AM
first_time_mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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definitely normal, although for about a week i thought i was just having normal back pain but it turned out to be a kidney infection.

is it more on either side of your back? can you still move with it?
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Robyn, wife to Steven, mom to Jake (7th Aug 2007)
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  #18  
May 16th, 2007, 05:36 AM
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It is in the centre. It is mostly in one paticular vertebra. It is quite annoying!
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  #19  
May 16th, 2007, 06:12 AM
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just sounds like back pain! it'll probably go once the baby moves postition. try kneeling on all fours to get him/her to shift!
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Robyn, wife to Steven, mom to Jake (7th Aug 2007)
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  #20  
May 16th, 2007, 01:24 PM
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i had a lot of back pain like you're having during my first seven weeks.
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