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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
November 15th, 2007, 09:14 PM
Mommy2Addy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Indiana, USA
Posts: 3,145
Sorry, I just don't know what to do right now. I found out last Sunday that I was pregnant. I'm single, not seeing anyone. And I just found out that the father of the baby is a complete *******.

I just told him about the baby tonight. He was pretty pissed. He pretty much begged me to get rid of it and couldn't understand why I couldn't do that. He even tried to make a deal with me. He told me that if I didn't have the baby now and I stayed in school, graduated, and got a job, then in a couple years if I hadn't found someone new he'd get with me again so I could have a baby.

I could have ****** him. I was so pissed. How could someone say something like that?! Then he tells me that he's not the person I think he is...that he's a convicted felon!! ***?! He slept with a 15 yr old girl. I just don't even know what to think right now. Maybe in light of that it's good that he doesn't want anything to do with my baby. I don't think I want him to.

So now I'm completely beside myself. I don't know what to do. I haven't told my parents yet. And he demanded that I tell them tomorrow (which I'm not going to do). But they're already going to be pissed at me for getting pregnant in the first place...now I have to add the fact that the father isn't the kind of person I thought he was and is a complete loser and wants nothing to do with me or my baby. I don't know what they're going to do or say. And I'm really scared about that.

I'm thinking about telling my mom on Monday. She's coming down to go Christmas shopping with me, so it'll just be the two of us. I'm thinking it will be easier to tell her alone than with my dad. I think she'll take it better than my dad will. I just hope that they'll be supportive.

I told the father that if my parents are supportive, then I won't ask him for anything...no support. But if they're not going to be supportive I don't know what I'll do. I mean, I'm in school and I don't have a job. I know this isn't the best time to be having a baby. But ######it I'm gonna do the right thing for me this time. I'm not going to let anyone else force me to do something that I don't want to do...like I did before. I've lost too much to go through it again. I just hope my parents understand that.

Sorry this has gotten to be a long rant. I just really need some help and support right now. I have like one best friend that's supporting me right now. I just got off the phone with her, telling her everything this guy said to me. She said if my parents don't support me I can come live with her. Here's hoping that it doesn't come to that...
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  #2  
November 16th, 2007, 12:02 PM
Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 364
Sorry to hear all the problems youa re going thru right now. A parents love is stronger than anytihng else so please tell your parents. Even if they are a little mad Im sure they will come aroudn and be ther for you. I cant answer what you should do about your baby and not here to preach but you should do whatever you feel in your heart is right and best for you. As far aas the father goes i would make him pay child support lol. Whether he is involved in the child's life or not he helped make the child and if nothing else needs to support the child. Good Luck and hope everything turns out well for you
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  #3  
November 21st, 2007, 08:36 PM
Grateful~Gentle~Mama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,332
First off, congratulations on your pregancy. I hope this one sticks for you, God bless you.

I have gone though this entire pregancy (which WAS planed but the father decided AFTER I got pregant that he didn't really want this at all) ayways, I've gone through the entire thing alone. I have ot spoken to Tim since I was about 6 weeks along. Spoke to his mom twice, but she hasn't shown any intrest or support at ALL. Not even to ask how me and baby are doing. Won't tell me where Tim is except that he is in Milwaki now (I live in Michigan) and I don't have any friends either, except my friends here on JM.

My parents are very supportive but they never fail to remind me of how much they are sacrificing and doing for me and the baby and that guilt weighs very heavily on me, makes me miserable. I do work but do not make nearly enough money to support myself and my child. I plan on getting a much better job or else working way more often after my son is born.

Anyways, I just wanted to say, it will be tough but you CAN do it and God sent you this baby for a reason. So they guy turned out to be a loser, at least you got a beautiful blessig out of it all. And yes, you are probably better off without him. Don't try to force him into aything, that way whatever kind of support you DO get will be a bonus, since you wont be couting on it.

HUGS
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  #4  
November 24th, 2007, 01:09 PM
hotjai21's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Texas
Posts: 13,895
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Im sorry that you are finding all of this out now. JM is a very supportive site, so i bet that with the help and support of the girls in here- you can def get through this. And what a jerk for saying that- that he will what look you up in a couple of years so you can have his kid??? Like you only want this baby because its his or something?? Screw him!! There are a lot of people out there that can do this on their own- and with some will power you can too! I would have him pay child support though- and if hes a convicted felon- then you can easily have full custody- so that the only contact he has with your child is a check once a month, if thats what you want that is. Sorry this reply is so late- but good luck, hopefully your mom took things well. And believe me- your her baby and with some time even if shes totally ticked now, she will come around.
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