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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
December 22nd, 2007, 12:01 PM
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i just turned 23 and my husband and i (we have been together since we were 16 and extremely in love still) have a gorgeous (unplanned) 10 month old baby girl. she is truly amazing and happy considering she had been very sick most of her life. her sicknesses have completely drained us financially and emotionally. we decided 100% no more kids. I had to give up breast feeding her when she was 5 months old in July and the day i quit i started Nueva Ring.

I never had a period while i was Bfing and i didn't get much of one after the first three weeks (July) of Neuva. i was not concerned about being preggo b/c me and Dh were fighting constantly (24/7 screaming baby really gets to you). SO i continued on the next month (Aug.). I told a friend about not having periods and she suggested i try a regimen of vitamin C and Don Quai to get things back into cycle. (much later i found out this was an abortion method from the 70's *yikes!*)

A week before my period i tried it and didn't work much better then doing nothing. So i tried it again a week before in sept. and didn't get a period at all. Dh told me to take a preg test, we took 2 and couldn't tell we thought we saw a verrrrrryyyy faint line but the other one had nothing. so i continued with the neuva ring. and end of Oct the same thing NO period, i freaked. i didn't feel pregnant and knew i was on BC i thought there was no possible way i could be preg. i was I set an appt with my midwife anyways just to talk to her about the BC.

At that point the earliest appt. was the first week in Dec, she suggested i discontinue Neuva anyways. Dh and I having made amends over the past couple months did not abstain from anything lol but we used pull out. When I got to the doc i was floored when she said "Congratulations!" she did the exam and did not feel any uterus growth said 4 weeks if anything as of now. She set me up with an U/S and this week and i am 13 FREAKING WEEKS PREGNANT!! *various curses censored*

I got pregnant on BC and used it one more month while preg. and vitamin C and don quai.... WTH?? what have i done???? I just know i have majorly screwed this kid up. I STILL have no preg symptoms. with my first two babies is was SICK all the time, everything hurt, this one i have constant pain- like someone is indian burning the organs in my pelvis- in my lower abdomen and ovary areas and that's it.

Suddenly I am catapulted into a second trimester and can't do ANYTHING about it. his family would rather have us miserable then to have us adopt out a kid (we considered it with our first but due to complication he died in utero at 20 weeks). DH is the only one working... he makes too much for us to have coordinated child care, i will never be able to go back to work and i was a semester away from completing my degree too! We barley have money to cover the bills we have now and eat too... This is going to make my daughter's life horrible how could I do this to her??? There is NO upside, I am just SO ANGRY...
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  #2  
December 22nd, 2007, 09:51 PM
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You know and I know that I could tell you that this won't make your daughter miserable. It will give her someone to be raised with. I could also tell you that it is MORE than likely that your baby is perfectly fine. But I know that's not what you need right now.

I want to offer my hugs and best wishes.. I know this must be extremely difficult. Actually.. I don't know. I can't possibly fathom, as I've never even been in a situation as such. I just know it wouldn't be easy.

As for not feeling pregnant.. that's just the way it is sometimes. Every single pregnancy can be different when it comes to symptoms and emotions.

I do hope you the best. Keep us updated, and feel free to vent any time. We promise not to offer unwanted advice in the face of a good vent = )
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  #3  
December 22nd, 2007, 09:59 PM
alb1382's Avatar Veteran
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Jax is right...each pregnancy is totally different. My son's was completely different from my daughters and you may just be having a different time with this one.

You're in my thoughts and prayers...
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  #4  
December 23rd, 2007, 08:39 PM
Nikki.'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
I do hope you the best. Keep us updated, and feel free to vent any time. We promise not to offer unwanted advice in the face of a good vent = )[/b]
I truly wish everything works out for you
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  #5  
December 24th, 2007, 08:10 PM
Gaby&Emmy'sMama's Avatar aka NZ-Emma
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Location: Christchurch, NZ
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Hi there

I'm new to this board too... I just found out I'm expecting #2 (me & boyfriend both have 1 child from previous relationships)...

I can't imagine how hard this has all been on you & your family. It's one thing to find out you're newly pregnant, but another (i'd imagine) to find out you're past the 1st trimester!!!

I'm keeping you in my thoughts!
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  #6  
December 30th, 2007, 05:31 PM
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I'm sure your baby is going to be just fine. I'm 36 weeks pregnant and got drunk more than once before I knew I was pregnant. I had like 10 lower back xrays done..which is a big no-no. But I didnt know? And I ALSO accidently drank BLEACH! My friends dad cleaned out her water dispenser thing with bleach and forgot to rinse it out and I downed a big huge drink before I could taste the bleach...I was sick for like 3 days. And I was like 6 months pregnant lol. But I had an ultrasound at 29 weeks and the lady said she looked just fine. So try not to worry about that.
As for everything else, it will all work out. I promise. I know it all seems bad now, but when you're holding your newborn baby, you'll understand what I mean. God would never give anyone more than they could handle. If you need to talk, PM me... Best wishes and keep your head up.
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  #7  
December 31st, 2007, 03:51 PM
Kalia20's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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A former co worker of mine who is very tall and skinny, drank and partied almost everyday and every weekend. She went to the ER one day cause she just did not feel right. Turns out she was 7 months pregnant!! She obviously wasnt showing at all. Was her second, and how she missed the baby moving, I dont know. Anyways, she was worried cause she drank hard alcohol, did crack, E and weed constantly. She stopped as soon as she found out of course. Her daughter is 6 now, shes so smart and turned out perfect.

I have two friends whos moms were hard alcoholics/drug users. My friends are just fine.
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  #8  
December 31st, 2007, 07:38 PM
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I honestly did not FEEL preggo til my third trimester. THe only sign was my tummy. I am VERY petiet... but also i got SMASHED at 4 weeks preggo, but didnt know, and my midwife noted it and said i was okay. Did you tell her? maybe she will know if that would have any complications.
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