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Pregnant and scared....


Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
February 21st, 2008, 09:31 AM
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 38
Hi all, my name's Patricia and I'm 20 years old and about 8 months pregnant...... I'm almost done here, since I'm due at the end of March. (my due date is March 25th.) I just never expected to be pregnant and responsible for someone else's life at this point in my life. I mean, dont get me wrong, I love my unborn son... so much....


I'm just so nervous and so scared about being a mommy.... espically since I'm going to be a single mom. The father of my child decided to be with me for the first 6 or 7 months, then told me that I would have to choose between him or my son.... and I chose my son. Men come and go but babies are forever and I couldn't call myself a loving mother if I'd chosen him. I know its going to be hard, being a single mom and providing for this little life and myself, but while I'm scared and hope that I don't make any mistakes, I just don't feel like there's anyone I know who really understands what's its like. Or how I feel.


I lost alot of friends when I found out I was pregnant. I don't have a whole lot of people I can turn to to ask questions like this or just to vent. Is it normal to be scared? I mean, how do am I going to know what I'm doing?Any advice you all have would be wonderful.

Thanks....
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  #2  
February 21st, 2008, 02:18 PM
itsmemaggi's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Hi, Patricia!

Let me start off by telling you how much I admire your courage and determination. You are a woman to emulate. Your child will be born next month to a mother who really, truly loves him. You couldn't ask for a better start.

With that said, of course it's natural to be scared! I don't have too many people in terms of support, my husband seems to run away from the topic of my pregnancy at this point, and my relationship with my family is strained, plus I don't have too many friends... But I think no matter how many people you try to surround yourself with, pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting are, generally, scary topics, especially for first-time parents like ourselves, who kind of had this thrust upon them. I find this board to be such a wealth of information, though: these are women who have been there many times, who have a variety of experiences, and could definitely identify with you in some way or another. Plus, I keep hearing about this "motherly instinct" thing. Gotta believe in that, too.

Keep us posted on the impending arrival of your little boy!!!

xoxo
Maggi
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  #3  
February 21st, 2008, 03:52 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Plainfield, CT
Posts: 243
Hi Patricia!

((huggz)) I know exactly how you feel, honey! When I found out I was pregnant with my DS I was in a very unstable and abusive relationship. I knew at that point I had to get out for my saftey and that of my baby. Of course, he found out about it and tried to force me into adoption! In fact, the first day he found out he beat the crap out of me, but only in my face because of the baby. How nice of him! (sarcasm). Well, after that I knew I had to leave, being single or not didn't matter anymore. He tried to convince me that everything would be okay if I just gave up my son, but I knew that it wouldn't and never had been in the first place! I began to get really depressed and panicked, and it even started showing when I LOST 5 pounds between month 7 and month 8. My OB/GYN said something was going wrong with me and I could talk to him. The entire thing spilled out of me and I cried so hard and for a long time. The doctor told me I had to do what I thought was best for me and the baby and not worry about what my b/f thought. Later I took the step and just never went back there after work one day. I showed up at my mom's house with only what I could pack up in my car and nothing else. Things were tough at first, but now I am happily married to my high school sweetheart after meeting again years later, and he loves my son just like his own! We are now TTC another baby.

Things will work out for you! Keep your chin up, okay?
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  #4  
February 22nd, 2008, 11:04 AM
2Corinthians10:4's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 12,959
Hi Patricia!! Im Meagan, 18, and expecting my daughter Addisen Grace on March 25 as well! That was a very hard decision you had to make and I look up to you and respect you so much for the choice you made. Your son is really lucky to have you as a mom. The girls here are really great and are amazing at giving advice....if you need anything just pm me!
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  #5  
February 25th, 2008, 09:15 AM
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 38
Thanks so much you guys.... All of this is so new to me and it's nice to know that there are other people out there who are going through or went through some of the same things I am.... and yeah, I do feel like I can idenfiy with some of the moms on here, cause most of you all have been through this before. It's nice to come here and just vent about my feelings, or even to give advice (what little I can give...) to other moms.....


Although I am reassured that I can indeed do this, I am still a bit scared. I'm so nervous that I'm going to mess up, or do something wrong...... I do wish that my son's father would be here..... I mean, how can you create something so wonderful, and then deny it? That's the hardest thing for me to understand..... I love my son so much, I couldn't ever picture me denying him, because he is a part of me... every little move he makes, (while at times can be painful....) I love. I just wish that his dad could love him, and maybe he does in his own way, but I just dont get how he can deny this wonderful, sweet, little life inside of me, that he helped me create....

Thanks so much ladies, I feel so loved, and its nice to know that I'm not alone....

(oh, yeah, my baby shower is coming up soon.... as much fun as it's going to be, it's certinally going to be interseting..... I'll have to update you all...)
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