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I chose life...


Abortion Debate

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  #1  
August 10th, 2006, 05:00 AM
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Is this considered a pro-life or a pro-choice saying?
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  #2  
August 10th, 2006, 06:53 AM
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I guess it could go both ways.
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  #3  
August 10th, 2006, 07:40 AM
mrobinson
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Is this considered a pro-life or a pro-choice saying?[/b]
I chose life? I say more pro-life but I could see the arguement about why it could be pro-choice.

The reason why I say pro-life is because it's a statement about life. Now if it said, I'm pro-choice on mommies shirt pushing a baby stroller that is a true statement about choice.
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  #4  
August 10th, 2006, 07:52 AM
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Yeah, I was wondering that...b/c I really like that saying, because for me it really WAS a choice, and a really hard one given my circumstances. And I was looking at one of those blinkies last night and I liked it, but I don't want to make it seem like I'm 100% pro-life...I dunno
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  #5  
August 10th, 2006, 07:58 AM
mrobinson
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Maybe a blinkie: I'm pro-choice baby, due in...

I dunno..
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  #6  
August 10th, 2006, 10:41 AM
chlodoll
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You can say - I had a choice - I chose life???

I think I choose life definitley can be pro-choice. You had the choice! And you choose life because that was best for you and your baby
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  #7  
August 10th, 2006, 10:49 AM
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I don't know, I think it would be more pro-choice. The point was that you CHOSE something. It happened to be life.
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  #8  
August 10th, 2006, 11:09 AM
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I always see the phrase used in a prolife manner - kind of like saying that prolife IS a choice, the right choice kinda thing....that, despite there being a "choice", the right choice is to choose life.

That's how I've always seen it used, but I can see how you can twist it more prochoice like...
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  #9  
August 11th, 2006, 10:05 PM
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My first thought is that it's a pro-life statement...as in: I chose life...as opposed to killing my child.
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  #10  
August 12th, 2006, 05:51 AM
tevinsangel
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Ditto on what CShellAK said. I've always seen this statement used by Pro-Lifers.
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  #11  
August 12th, 2006, 09:12 AM
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To me it says pro-life. Maybe if you bolded the chose or something it might be more pro-choice.
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  #13  
August 12th, 2006, 05:38 PM
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OK, well I have been thinking about it, and I really think it is more of a pro-choice saying (although it can go either way) I think that the belief that it is a strictly pro-life saying is based on the misconception that pro-choicers are pro abortion, when really this is not the case. I am pro choice, but i hate abortion, I hate that it has to exist, but I recognize that for some women it is a necessity to end a pregnancy, and I understand that and I am happy that there is a safe and legal way to do this. And someone who is pro choice celebrates life as well. Also, many people (especially pro-lifers) don't really understand the concept of choice-as far as a pregnancy goes. I hear so many people say on here "I loved my baby from the moment I saw the pink line on the pregnancy test! I could never kill my baby" and they don't understand that it is not like that for everyone. Speaking for myself, I did not fall in love as soon as I saw the pink line. I was scared out of my mind. I was upset and felt like my life was over. And I know that's a tough concept for a woman who has never had an unplanned pregnancy to grasp, especially if they are TTC and would give anything to have a child, and I understand that. Shoot, one of the first things I thought when I found out was how unfair this was because I have an aunt who has been TTC for over 6 years with no luck, and I knew she would give anything to be holding a positive test in her hand. And then when my friends, and my family found out they were shocked and told me to end the pregnancy. And my boyfriend at the time told me that he would have nothing to do with me if I went through with the pregnancy, that he would leave me and sign over his rights as soon as the child was born. So I agonized over the descision for weeks-I basically had to make a choice between continuing on with my life, which at the time honestly I was having a blast, young and free with no inhibitions and very little responsibility, or completely changing the course of it. Putting school on hold, losing my social life, losing my job, my boyfriend and being a single mom at 21. It was mind boggling to me. But ultimately, I obviously decided to keep the baby, and while I don't regret it for a moment and I love my daughter and I can't wait to meet her, I still recognize that it was a CHOICE to continue with the pregnancy and bring her into the world, and I celebrate that.
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  #14  
August 13th, 2006, 01:23 PM
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OT, but I wanted to share with you Blondie how I felt when I first got pregnant with DS.

I got married when I was 18, and I was a virgin until I got married. Our wedding day was on March 2, 2001. My husband and I wanted to wait 5 years before having a baby. We wanted to live like two spontaneous newlyweds. Taking little vacations here and there. Getting to know each other. And just honeymoonen' as long as we could. We wanted to have a house before the kids came. My dreams of that came to an end when I took a pregnancy test in July of that same year and it was positive. So our 5 years turned into only 4 months.

I was devasted! I walked out of the bathroom and just started screaming at my husband "You did this to me, it's all your fault" (we used condoms EVERY time, but on two different occasions the condom busted.) My husband saw how upset I was, and was trying not to smile. But he was actually really excited that we were pregnant.

I called my sister and asked her if the line on the test is extemely light, does that mean it's still positive? Of course the answer was yes. I hung of the phone, and went into our kitchen and just curled up on the floor and cried. I was not ready to be a mom. I wasn't ready to give up my body and my life for someone else.

My husband and I went to K-mart that night. I was literally walking around punching my stomach. I was so angry! The thought of actually going and getting an abortion never crossed my mind, but I was hoping that I would have a miscarriage or something. My DH kept telling me to stop hitting my stomach. He wanted this child, and was so excited about it.

It took me about a month before I could actually say that I was happy that I was going to have a baby. Before that I would just cry, for no reason. I would be sitting in church just bawling my eyes out. People would come up to me and ask me what was wrong. How could I tell them that I was pregnant, but didn't want to be?

When I was 20 wks pregnant, by this time I was attached to the baby. I went to use the bathroom and stood up and there was blood...a lot of it. Immediately I started screaming "No, No, No", what if my wishes that I had in the beginning were coming true. What if I was going to lose this precious baby?

Ended up the doc said that it was probably internal hemrroids that ruptured and the baby was fine.

Now, I feel sick sometimes when I think back to how I felt about my pregnancy in the beginning. Now my son is 4 1/2, and I can't imagine him not being in my life. I can't believe that I didn't want him.

I will never tell him how I felt. I don't want him to know that I didn't want to have a baby yet.

I wrote this to let you know, that yes, I do know how it feels to have an unplanned pregnancy. I know how it feels to feel like your life is over, because from here on out it's all about a child. None of my friends were pregnant, and I know how it feels to be gaining weight and all of your friends be skinny. I know how it feels to have a newborn baby to care for when your friends go out to the movies or shopping.

I am so thankful that despite of my selfish attitude towards having a baby so soon, that my God allowed him to be a healthy baby.
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  #15  
August 13th, 2006, 02:37 PM
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Quote:
OT, but I wanted to share with you Blondie how I felt when I first got pregnant with DS.

I got married when I was 18, and I was a virgin until I got married. Our wedding day was on March 2, 2001. My husband and I wanted to wait 5 years before having a baby. We wanted to live like two spontaneous newlyweds. Taking little vacations here and there. Getting to know each other. And just honeymoonen' as long as we could. We wanted to have a house before the kids came. My dreams of that came to an end when I took a pregnancy test in July of that same year and it was positive. So our 5 years turned into only 4 months.

I was devasted! I walked out of the bathroom and just started screaming at my husband "You did this to me, it's all your fault" (we used condoms EVERY time, but on two different occasions the condom busted.) My husband saw how upset I was, and was trying not to smile. But he was actually really excited that we were pregnant.

I called my sister and asked her if the line on the test is extemely light, does that mean it's still positive? Of course the answer was yes. I hung of the phone, and went into our kitchen and just curled up on the floor and cried. I was not ready to be a mom. I wasn't ready to give up my body and my life for someone else.

My husband and I went to K-mart that night. I was literally walking around punching my stomach. I was so angry! The thought of actually going and getting an abortion never crossed my mind, but I was hoping that I would have a miscarriage or something. My DH kept telling me to stop hitting my stomach. He wanted this child, and was so excited about it.

It took me about a month before I could actually say that I was happy that I was going to have a baby. Before that I would just cry, for no reason. I would be sitting in church just bawling my eyes out. People would come up to me and ask me what was wrong. How could I tell them that I was pregnant, but didn't want to be?

When I was 20 wks pregnant, by this time I was attached to the baby. I went to use the bathroom and stood up and there was blood...a lot of it. Immediately I started screaming "No, No, No", what if my wishes that I had in the beginning were coming true. What if I was going to lose this precious baby?

Ended up the doc said that it was probably internal hemrroids that ruptured and the baby was fine.

Now, I feel sick sometimes when I think back to how I felt about my pregnancy in the beginning. Now my son is 4 1/2, and I can't imagine him not being in my life. I can't believe that I didn't want him.

I will never tell him how I felt. I don't want him to know that I didn't want to have a baby yet.

I wrote this to let you know, that yes, I do know how it feels to have an unplanned pregnancy. I know how it feels to feel like your life is over, because from here on out it's all about a child. None of my friends were pregnant, and I know how it feels to be gaining weight and all of your friends be skinny. I know how it feels to have a newborn baby to care for when your friends go out to the movies or shopping.

I am so thankful that despite of my selfish attitude towards having a baby so soon, that my God allowed him to be a healthy baby.[/b]
Wow thanks so much for sharing that! That was very brave and honest of you....and I think it is sooo important that women talk about this because honestly, I think this might be a big reason many women have abortions! I know that thought crossed my mind "well, if I was really ready to be a mother I would love this baby already, so maybe I should end the pregnancy b/c if I don't love this baby now I probobly never will", but after talking to other women, not everyone feels that way. Even some women who have had planned pregnancies don't feel that way! And there is sooo much pressure on women to be the perfect mom I think that we feel like there is something wrong with us if we don't have that instant connection and motherly instinct take over, but it's not always simple like that. Having a baby is such a HUGE change in someones life, it can take months, even years to get used to the idea and actually be happy about it! In the beginning there were times I wished for a miscarraige too There are honestly still times when I'm like "this still doesn't feel real. I don't feel attached to this baby" And it's hard because I sometimes get mad, like last weekend when I realized I had **gasp** stretch marks already and I have gained sooo much weight, and I flipped out and was actually really angry because I feel like my body will never be the same again (which it wont!) and that life as I know it is over (which it is). But then there are times like today, when I was shopping and I ran across a cute little sock monkey and I thought "oh Mattea will love that!" and I realize that I do love my daughter, it's just one of those things that takes time to get used too. And I had an incident similar to yours that really made me turn around. I got really sick about a month and a half ago and I had to go to the emergency room. And I was so scared because I hadn't felt her move at all that day. The doctor told me that I might have meningitis and that the baby might not make it if I did....and then I asked if I could have someone check the heartbeat to make sure she was ok. So the nurse came in and was checking for the beat for like, half and hour, and nothing. She couldn't even find a trace of it. So she got another machine, and kept trying and trying, but I basically felt like my whole life was over and I had lost my baby. And then she found it, beating away strong at 170 BPM, the little brat was curled up on my left side hiding from her ...and let me tell you, I have NEVER heard a more beautiful sound in my life, and any doubt I ever had that I was capable of loving my daughter were erased in that moment
But anyways, yeah this thread has gone dreadfully O/T but thank you for sharing this, and hopefully someone who is having those same feelings will see this and feel better that they are not the only one!
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  #16  
August 14th, 2006, 10:39 AM
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I chose life... Is Pro-Chose. I chose life to me means I Choose the life I know. Ie. Free and single, Childless, or the family I have. As for being attached even though we were TTC it took me almost 7 months AFTER or more he was borin to care about him. If it wasn't for his dad I would have put him up for adoption. I felt like a horrible parent for a long time for that. However I now could never imagion being without him. I relize I'm just a person that dislikes infants (even holding them). I love him to death but honestly knowing what what I know now (I couldn't have) I would have adopting a toddler. I realise now I'm an exelent parent. I've never told anyone that because I know people would think negitivly of me. My husband loves knowing I have this weakness. I think it's because he's so good with infants and it reminds him I need him around.
My BIL just had a son and his wife gave me him to hold while he was sleeping so she could get somthing. He woke and started crying. my husband took him and I was sick to my stomic. He was smiling everytime they gave me the baby because he knows it makes me sick to my stomic.

If anyone feels I'm a bad person or parent please remember you have weaknesses too. My weakness just isn't as acseptable
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  #18  
August 14th, 2006, 10:59 AM
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Quote:
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE
Quote:
My first thought is that it's a pro-life statement...as in: I chose life...as opposed to killing my child.[/b]
ITA.
[/b][/quote]

But how does that make it a pro-life statement? Pro-choicers celebrate the choice to continue with a pregnancy too...
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  #19  
August 14th, 2006, 11:08 AM
mrobinson
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Quote:
Quote:
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE
<div class='quotemain'>My first thought is that it's a pro-life statement...as in: I chose life...as opposed to killing my child.[/b]
ITA.
[/b][/quote]

But how does that make it a pro-life statement? Pro-choicers celebrate the choice to continue with a pregnancy too...
[/b][/quote]
Because your pregnancy blinkie which will turn into a "my baby is this many old" demonstrated your commitment to life without being obnoxious.
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  #20  
August 14th, 2006, 11:18 AM
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE
<div class='quotemain'>My first thought is that it's a pro-life statement...as in: I chose life...as opposed to killing my child.[/b]
ITA.
[/b]
But how does that make it a pro-life statement? Pro-choicers celebrate the choice to continue with a pregnancy too...
[/b][/quote]
Because your pregnancy blinkie which will turn into a "my baby is this many old" demonstrated your commitment to life without being obnoxious.
[/b][/quote]

Well I wasn't even asking in reference to the blinkie so much, I could honestly care less about the blinkie (although I don't really see how it would be obnoxious ) I just meant in general
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