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100% pro-choice but would never have an abortion


Abortion Debate

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  #1  
August 25th, 2006, 07:47 AM
mrobinson
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Why? If a gal claims they would NEVER have an abortion yet are 100% pro-choice, why are you 100% pro-choice? Why are you ok with it being someone else but not you? How can it never happen to you? Is it guilt holding you back?

If you ever got raped you wouldn't? If you were on welfare, you DH was struggling with something very serious or wasn't the DH you thought he was, you wouldnt'?

I could never say never.. I want a baby by my DH so right now I wouldn't.. But if was downtown Calgary at 10pm (which happens frequently) and I got raped you're ### right I wouldn't carry that baby.
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  #2  
August 25th, 2006, 07:52 AM
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While I wouldn't do it myself, I would never claim that my opinions (and, when it comes to life begining, all we have are unproven theories and opinions) should be forced on others. In addition, while I have the financial, medical, and family support I need, I know that our society doesn't come close to providing these thigns for everyone.
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  #3  
August 25th, 2006, 07:53 AM
mrobinson
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While I wouldn't do it myself, I would never claim that my opinions (and, when it comes to life begining, all we have are unproven theories and opinions) should be forced on others. In addition, while I have the financial, medical, and family support I need, I know that our society doesn't come close to providing these thigns for everyone.[/b]
So for you, the bottom line is, you would never have an abortion?
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  #4  
August 25th, 2006, 07:56 AM
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I have too many "would have could have didn't" and "what if" moments in my life to add one more. I would have the child (I also know that my body handles pregnancy fairly well and other things that someone who is raped/victim of incest but has never had a child doesn't know).
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  #5  
August 25th, 2006, 08:00 AM
Jen25's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Its hard to explain, but in my current situation, I dont see myself having one. Not even for rape. I would probably lean toward adoption in that situation, though. I mean I guess I shouldnt say "never", but that is just the way I feel. Its like religion to me, some things can be "right" for some people, but not for others. I personally see abortion as wrong, but Im not going to force my veiw on others, just as I dont push my spiritual veiws on others. I dont think the same way, or feel the same things as others do. For instance, some people dont think its life till its born, while I think that life begins at conception. No one can really prove 100% when life does begin, so who am I to force everyone to think the same way I do. I mean really its like some people love Big Brother, I think its the dumbest show ever invented That doesnt mean that I am right and they are wrong...Does that make any sense or am I just rambling
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  #6  
August 25th, 2006, 08:00 AM
mrobinson
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I have too many "would have could have didn't" and "what if" moments in my life to add one more.[/b]
So previous issues are holding you back from having an abortion.. I'm going to PM you because I still don't understand. A past holding a person to the future is just as damaging, IMHO.

Quote:
I would have the child (I also know that my body handles pregnancy fairly well and other things that someone who is raped/victim of incest but has never had a child doesn't know).[/b]
PMing..
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  #7  
August 25th, 2006, 08:08 AM
hayley76's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I would 100% have an abortion in the case of rape or incest!!! No ifs, and or buts about it.
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  #8  
August 25th, 2006, 08:09 AM
mrobinson
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Its hard to explain, but in my current situation, I dont see myself having one. Not even for rape. I would probably lean toward adoption in that situation, though. I mean I guess I shouldnt say "never", but that is just the way I feel. Its like religion to me, some things can be "right" for some people, but not for others. I personally see abortion as wrong, but Im not going to force my veiw on others, just as I dont push my spiritual veiws on others. I dont think the same way, or feel the same things as others do. For instance, some people dont think its life till its born, while I think that life begins at conception. No one can really prove 100% when life does begin, so who am I to force everyone to think the same way I do. I mean really its like some people love Big Brother, I think its the dumbest show ever invented That doesnt mean that I am right and they are wrong...Does that make any sense or am I just rambling [/b]
I understand what you mean that one everyone can feel the same.. that's why I need to ask more questions. I guess I feel either people are liberated with it or they're not.. But I can see how many people feel that it's ok for others just not for me. (I feel that way about most religions.)

Here's what I don't understand.. By your spiritual values you think it's wrong yet you don't know 100% when life begins.. Are you just being safe then by possibly never having one? So there is zero chance you make a spiritual mistake?

With a different filter of perspective, do you feel 100% liberated personally? Why then is your body confided to a spiritual belief that contradicts your liberation?
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  #9  
August 25th, 2006, 08:19 AM
Jen25's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Here's what I don't understand.. By your spiritual values you think it's wrong yet you don't know 100% when life begins.. Are you just being safe then by possibly never having one? So there is zero chance you make a spiritual mistake?

With a different filter of perspective, do you feel 100% liberated personally? Why then is your body confided to a spiritual belief that contradicts your liberation?[/b]
Its not so much that my spiritual beleifs say its wrong. Its just a gut feeling that I have. There is no way for me to process that its ok. I am the kind of person that follows my gut instincts. I feel very in tune with myself. To me, not having an abortion has nothing to do with guilt, and everything to do with that it just doesnt feel right to me. Im just going by how I feel, not by what any religion or spiritual beleife tells me. I do feel 100% liberated and not confined at all. Hope that clears things up, if not let me know and I will try to explain it better.

ETA: My spritual beleifs boil down to this: I follow the instincts that God gave me. I dont follow rules or whatever, I just try my best to do what I feel is right.
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  #10  
August 25th, 2006, 08:24 AM
mrobinson
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Its not so much that my spiritual beleifs say its wrong. Its just a gut feeling that I have. There is no way for me to process that its ok. I am the kind of person that follows my gut instincts. I feel very in tune with myself. To me, not having an abortion has nothing to do with guilt, and everything to do with that it just doesnt feel right to me. Im just going by how I feel, not by what any religion or spiritual beleife tells me. I do feel 100% liberated and not confined at all. Hope that clears things up, if not let me know and I will try to explain it better.[/b]
I want to process it... For now, I'll be running the senerio how a gut feeling isn't contradictary to liberation.. I have gut feelings about things too so I will seriously be putting thought into it and how that applies.

I personally have a strong feeling that guilt and regret are parts to consider to this... this website really hit home for me and I hope it helps explain it better than I could.
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  #11  
August 25th, 2006, 09:28 AM
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I can honestly say that I would NOT have abortion if I was raped. It has never happened to me, thank God, but I just don't see how aborting an innocent child would make the situation any better. I might give it up for adoption, or I might keep it, but I just couldn't kill my children's half-sibling. (By the way, my DH said he'd have a VERY hard time with something like this--like it would be a big picnic for me!--but I think he would get over it in time.)
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  #12  
August 25th, 2006, 09:31 AM
mrobinson
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I can honestly say that I would NOT have abortion if I was raped. It has never happened to me, thank God, but I just don't see how aborting an innocent child would make the situation any better. I might give it up for adoption, or I might keep it, but I just couldn't kill my children's half-sibling. (By the way, my DH said he'd have a VERY hard time with something like this--like it would be a big picnic for me!--but I think he would get over it in time.)[/b]
However, you have never claimed to be 100% pro-choice either...
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  #14  
August 25th, 2006, 09:35 AM
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Quote:
I can honestly say that I would NOT have abortion if I was raped. It has never happened to me, thank God, but I just don't see how aborting an innocent child would make the situation any better. I might give it up for adoption, or I might keep it, but I just couldn't kill my children's half-sibling. (By the way, my DH said he'd have a VERY hard time with something like this--like it would be a big picnic for me!--but I think he would get over it in time.)[/b]
However, you have never claimed to be 100% pro-choice either...
[/b]
So true now, but I once was. I used to be 100% pro-choice for "everybody else" but 100% pro-life for me. Now I guess I am 100% pro-life for real, so if that makes my opinion not count, I'm sorry I butted in. Carry on amongst yourselves...
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  #15  
August 25th, 2006, 09:40 AM
mrobinson
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I don't mind pro-lifers coming on here because it just furthers exactly why I can't understand this prespective.. We are not even close to being on the same page yet people who claim to be 100% pro-choice, yet would never have an abortion, aren't exactly either.

(but you are distrubing my mediation on this.. Probably for the best though as I should get back to work.)
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  #16  
August 25th, 2006, 10:11 AM
~Jess~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Isn't being pro-choice about choice? About being 100% in support of a woman's right to choose what's right for herself? Just because a woman chooses not to have an abortion herself doesn't mean she doesn't support someone else choosing to have an abortion. It's about CHOICE, which means that it shouldn't matter WHICH choice the woman makes. That said, I do think it's a bit reactionary to state "100% pro-choice but I would NEVER have one." I think "100% pro choice and although I don't see myself having an abortion, I'm thankful I have the option available" would be much more appropriate.
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  #18  
August 25th, 2006, 10:20 AM
mrobinson
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I think "100% pro choice and although I don't see myself having an abortion, I'm thankful I have the option available" would be much more appropriate.[/b]
I think that makes perfect sense.

I think the idea of choice for many women who claim to be liberated is still limited based on their own preceived notion of guilt and regret. That's why there is some flexablity but if someone truly feels they could never have an abortion, I know their idea of liberation is far different from mine..

A person who is pro-life isn't liberated the same because they have a personal belief that their relationship with God is beyond her choices here on Earth.. Hey I can at least respect that. A person who claims to be 100% pro-choice but would never have an abortion, is held back because of something.. they aren't fully free. Guilt, regret and past issues are obvious part of it. Most don't own it and work past it. At least a pro-lifer owns feeling a trust with God.. A pro-choicer, without owning her feelings of where she can't commit, isn't totally free. There has to be a reason.



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******WARNING WARNING*******

Pro-lifer here lol jk

I used to be 100% pro-choice...I have never thought that I would get one. I have always knew in my heart I couldn't, even in the case of rape...Even though I was indifferent to hearing others getting one...or two...or three....etc. I really could have cared less. Honestly, when I was 100% pro-choice, I think the reason that had me thinking that I could not go thru with one, is that I just didn't want to have to go thru the procedure itself...I probably would've been too scared to be awake for the procedure...At least with giving birth, I would've had 9 months to postpone it and worry about it...I'm terrified of doctors....

Now that I am 100% pro-life....I can now see that it is a life from the start...so my feelings have changed as to WHY I wouldn't....but it has always been that I wouldn't, even in the cases of rape. JMO.[/b]
You have a commited soul to God. That is your reasoning...
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  #20  
August 25th, 2006, 10:25 AM
mrobinson
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Yes, but I was just also pointing that it didn't use to be my reasoning before I became pro-life....My reasoning beforehand was just purely based on me being a chicken and hypochondriac. [/b]
I never did say that a person who is pro-life don't have issues either.. I do take issue with people who claim to be 100% pro-choice but don't fully understand why...
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