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Abortion Debate

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  #1  
June 29th, 2007, 09:03 PM
Dayna1
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Do you feel empathy for the woman after she has had an abortion? I know alot of pro lifers who don't care about the woman at all...yet I'm pro life and I feel so sad for her too.

Just merely curious.
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  #2  
June 29th, 2007, 09:12 PM
Bre+Will=Reid
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Of course. I know from semi-personal experience the anguish that a woman can go through after abortion. I have heard people close to me say "I think about that un-born child every single day, and think about what life would have been like if I hadn't had that abortion". It's terribly sad. A friend of mine even confessed to me after a miscarriage that she thought it might be God's way to getting back at her for having an abortion several years ago. That broke my heart.

The women close to me who have had abortions include my own mother, my very Christian step-mom (who was not religious at the time), and 3 of my best friends. Except for one instance, I will never, ever judge them for what they have done. I know that it's hard enough for them to deal with it, and it's something that they must always live with.

Yet another reason why I am pro-life I guess...

The only time that I do not feel empathy is for the women who uses abortion as a birth control method, having abortion after abortion after abortion...with zero regrets or a sense of remorse. If a woman has remorse and attempts to change her ways by practicing safer sex, then she is all good in my book. Who am I to judge? I can feel what I feel and believe what I believe, but I am not here to judge.
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  #3  
June 29th, 2007, 09:17 PM
*Aspen*
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Quote:
Of course. I know from semi-personal experience the anguish that a woman can go through after abortion. I have heard people close to me say "I think about that un-born child every single day, and think about what life would have been like if I hadn't had that abortion". It's terribly sad. A friend of mine even confessed to me after a miscarriage that she thought it might be God's way to getting back at her for having an abortion several years ago. That broke my heart.

The women close to me who have had abortions include my own mother, my very Christian step-mom (who was not religious at the time), and 3 of my best friends. Except for one instance, I will never, ever judge them for what they have done. I know that it's hard enough for them to deal with it, and it's something that they must always live with.

Yet another reason why I am pro-life I guess...

The only time that I do not feel empathy is for the women who uses abortion as a birth control method, having abortion after abortion after abortion...with zero regrets or a sense of remorse. If a woman has remorse and attempts to change her ways by practicing safer sex, then she is all good in my book. Who am I to judge? I can feel what I feel and believe what I believe, but I am not here to judge.[/b]
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  #4  
June 29th, 2007, 09:18 PM
LaceyMommy2B
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i do, usually.. there have been a select few cases that i havent felt bad for the mother..

a girl that i had been best friends with for years decided that route and i told her i wouldnt support her decision, but i would support her.. after she had it, she confided in me (we hadnt talked about why she chose to abort) that she was so glad that she didnt have to get all fat but was excited cause her boobs were still big even 2wks after the abortion. i was disgusted and couldnt feel sorry for her. maybe im wrong for that, but ugh.

the other, DH's friend came over the other night and was laughing while telling us that his wife went and got ANOTHER abortion cause she was preg with twins AGAIN (they have already aborted at least one other set). he kept joking about it and saying that she said she had to "get them babies OUT!" birth control is free thru tricare, but considering this is not only not her 1st abortion since they have been married, but also not her first abortion of twins, i have to wonder if they are making use of it. i cant feel bad for anyone who takes it so lightly and makes jokes about it. i guess i couldnt really feel bad for the dad.. i dont know her side that well.. he could be threatening her to get them, but i def dont feel sorry for him. i do wonder tho, if he has any education on what abortion is.. i dont know, but he made me sick.
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  #5  
June 29th, 2007, 09:20 PM
*Aspen*
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i do, usually.. there have been a select few cases that i havent felt bad for the mother..

a girl that i had been best friends with for years decided that route and i told her i wouldnt support her decision, but i would support her.. after she had it, she confided in me (we hadnt talked about why she chose to abort) that she was so glad that she didnt have to get all fat but was excited cause her boobs were still big even 2wks after the abortion. i was disgusted and couldnt feel sorry for her. maybe im wrong for that, but ugh.

the other, DH's friend came over the other night and was laughing while telling us that his wife went and got ANOTHER abortion cause she was preg with twins AGAIN (they have already aborted at least one other set). he kept joking about it and saying that she said she had to "get them babies OUT!" birth control is free thru tricare, but considering this is not only not her 1st abortion since they have been married, but also not her first abortion of twins, i have to wonder if they are making use of it. i cant feel bad for anyone who takes it so lightly and makes jokes about it. i guess i couldnt really feel bad for the dad.. i dont know her side that well.. he could be threatening her to get them, but i def dont feel sorry for him. i do wonder tho, if he has any education on what abortion is.. i dont know, but he made me sick.[/b]
some ppl are so shallow and some ppl don't have a clue
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  #6  
June 29th, 2007, 09:21 PM
Bre+Will=Reid
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Quote:
Quote:
Of course. I know from semi-personal experience the anguish that a woman can go through after abortion. I have heard people close to me say "I think about that un-born child every single day, and think about what life would have been like if I hadn't had that abortion". It's terribly sad. A friend of mine even confessed to me after a miscarriage that she thought it might be God's way to getting back at her for having an abortion several years ago. That broke my heart.

The women close to me who have had abortions include my own mother, my very Christian step-mom (who was not religious at the time), and 3 of my best friends. Except for one instance, I will never, ever judge them for what they have done. I know that it's hard enough for them to deal with it, and it's something that they must always live with.

Yet another reason why I am pro-life I guess...

The only time that I do not feel empathy is for the women who uses abortion as a birth control method, having abortion after abortion after abortion...with zero regrets or a sense of remorse. If a woman has remorse and attempts to change her ways by practicing safer sex, then she is all good in my book. Who am I to judge? I can feel what I feel and believe what I believe, but I am not here to judge.[/b]

[/b]
She said that it was harder to give her dog up for adoption at the SPCA than to have an abortion of a baby that she semi-planned, but changed her mind. One of my best friends. She doesn't know that I feel that way. I guess I phrased it wrong. Whereas I may not judge her, my opinion of her has changed. I do not respect her the same way that I did before.
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  #7  
June 29th, 2007, 09:22 PM
*Aspen*
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Quote:
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Of course. I know from semi-personal experience the anguish that a woman can go through after abortion. I have heard people close to me say "I think about that un-born child every single day, and think about what life would have been like if I hadn't had that abortion". It's terribly sad. A friend of mine even confessed to me after a miscarriage that she thought it might be God's way to getting back at her for having an abortion several years ago. That broke my heart.

The women close to me who have had abortions include my own mother, my very Christian step-mom (who was not religious at the time), and 3 of my best friends. Except for one instance, I will never, ever judge them for what they have done. I know that it's hard enough for them to deal with it, and it's something that they must always live with.

Yet another reason why I am pro-life I guess...

The only time that I do not feel empathy is for the women who uses abortion as a birth control method, having abortion after abortion after abortion...with zero regrets or a sense of remorse. If a woman has remorse and attempts to change her ways by practicing safer sex, then she is all good in my book. Who am I to judge? I can feel what I feel and believe what I believe, but I am not here to judge.[/b]

[/b]
She said that it was harder to give her dog up for adoption at the SPCA than to have an abortion of a baby that she semi-planned, but changed her mind. One of my best friends. She doesn't know that I feel that way. I guess I phrased it wrong. Whereas I may not judge her, my opinion of her has changed. I do not respect her the same way that I did before.
[/b]
Some ppl will never cease to amaze me I would have to agree with you on many points.
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  #9  
June 29th, 2007, 10:00 PM
mommyKathyX3
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Depends really. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. Depends on the circumstances.
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  #10  
June 30th, 2007, 10:20 AM
wifey2kevin's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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its very hard for me to say. i'm sure i'm "closed minded" or something , but its hard for me to grasp that someone who PURPOSELY removed a pregnancy feels a loss.....no....let me rephrase that. if they feel that it is a loss, wouldn't that be a sign that maybe its wrong? i know a loss is a loss, and i'm sure she feels bad....but i just find it difficult to feel sorry when it was a choice unlike a miscarriage.

ok.....let the bashings begin!!!!
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  #11  
June 30th, 2007, 12:31 PM
eash's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
its very hard for me to say. i'm sure i'm "closed minded" or something , but its hard for me to grasp that someone who PURPOSELY removed a pregnancy feels a loss.....no....let me rephrase that. if they feel that it is a loss, wouldn't that be a sign that maybe its wrong? i know a loss is a loss, and i'm sure she feels bad....but i just find it difficult to feel sorry when it was a choice unlike a miscarriage.

ok.....let the bashings begin!!!![/b]
Taken from YOUR blinkie - "I am not perfect, I am forgiven."
Maybe providing compassion and understanding for all women who are in pain is what is needed rather than judgement.
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  #13  
June 30th, 2007, 01:00 PM
wifey2kevin's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Quote:
its very hard for me to say. i'm sure i'm "closed minded" or something , but its hard for me to grasp that someone who PURPOSELY removed a pregnancy feels a loss.....no....let me rephrase that. if they feel that it is a loss, wouldn't that be a sign that maybe its wrong? i know a loss is a loss, and i'm sure she feels bad....but i just find it difficult to feel sorry when it was a choice unlike a miscarriage.

ok.....let the bashings begin!!!![/b]
Taken from YOUR blinkie - "I am not perfect, I am forgiven."
Maybe providing compassion and understanding for all women who are in pain is what is needed rather than judgement.
[/b]
i'm NOT perfect and THANK GOD i'm forgiven!! that being said, since i'm not perfect, i don't always do the right thing. i have problems doing the right thing and forgiving(i'm human!!!!) when i'm "supposed" to. and for the record....i do provide compassion.....i have so much compassion for those precious innocent babies that are no longer with us.
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Kristin, proud Air Force wife to Kevin(since 01.20.06)
Mommy to Kaylynn Grace(11.20.06), Jackson William(3.18.08),
Carsyn Olivia(9.5.09), and Noah Cauthen(10.27.11)


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  #15  
June 30th, 2007, 01:15 PM
wifey2kevin's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(mommy2kaylee-bug @ Jun 30 2007, 12:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
<div class='quotemain'>its very hard for me to say. i'm sure i'm "closed minded" or something , but its hard for me to grasp that someone who PURPOSELY removed a pregnancy feels a loss.....no....let me rephrase that. if they feel that it is a loss, wouldn't that be a sign that maybe its wrong? i know a loss is a loss, and i'm sure she feels bad....but i just find it difficult to feel sorry when it was a choice unlike a miscarriage. ok.....let the bashings begin!!!![/b]
Taken from YOUR blinkie - "I am not perfect, I am forgiven."Maybe providing compassion and understanding for all women who are in pain is what is needed rather than judgement.[/b]
i'm NOT perfect and THANK GOD i'm forgiven!! that being said, since i'm not perfect, i don't always do the right thing. i have problems doing the right thing and forgiving(i'm human!!!!) when i'm "supposed" to. and for the record....i do provide compassion.....i have so much compassion for those precious innocent babies that are no longer with us.[/b][/quote]Why is the word 'supposed' in quotations? Are you implying that you really aren't supposed to or something? The women deserve just as much compassion. After all, they have to live with it for the rest of their lives.

Do you honestly not feel compassion for a woman who was raped?

A woman who was abused?

A young girl without her family?

A single mother without her family?
[/b][/quote]

ok.....i'll rephrase again. i feel bad for women who have abortions and then later have a change of heart and realize that it was wrong. does that make sense?
and of course i feel bad for women who are raped, abused, etc. the difference is that they didn't choose to be raped, abused, without a family, etc. if someone has an abortion....they CHOOSE to do it. thats where i see a difference. did that explain what i meant a little better? i'm really not cold hearted as i'm sure some of you may think.
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Mommy to Kaylynn Grace(11.20.06), Jackson William(3.18.08),
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  #16  
June 30th, 2007, 01:15 PM
eash's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 1,969
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
its very hard for me to say. i'm sure i'm "closed minded" or something , but its hard for me to grasp that someone who PURPOSELY removed a pregnancy feels a loss.....no....let me rephrase that. if they feel that it is a loss, wouldn't that be a sign that maybe its wrong? i know a loss is a loss, and i'm sure she feels bad....but i just find it difficult to feel sorry when it was a choice unlike a miscarriage.

ok.....let the bashings begin!!!![/b]
Taken from YOUR blinkie - "I am not perfect, I am forgiven."
Maybe providing compassion and understanding for all women who are in pain is what is needed rather than judgement.
[/b]
i'm NOT perfect and THANK GOD i'm forgiven!! that being said, since i'm not perfect, i don't always do the right thing. i have problems doing the right thing and forgiving(i'm human!!!!) when i'm "supposed" to. and for the record....i do provide compassion.....i have so much compassion for those precious innocent babies that are no longer with us.
[/b]
I think compassion comes from having the maturity and selflessness to recognize that everyone has a story and has made painful choices based on their own story. You are not "supposed" to do anything - forgiving because the bible tells you to do it ( rather than recognizing the pain and having compassion for women who have had abortions ) is wasted energy.
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  #18  
June 30th, 2007, 01:27 PM
wifey2kevin's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(mommy2kaylee-bug @ Jun 30 2007, 12:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
<div class='quotemain'>its very hard for me to say. i'm sure i'm "closed minded" or something , but its hard for me to grasp that someone who PURPOSELY removed a pregnancy feels a loss.....no....let me rephrase that. if they feel that it is a loss, wouldn't that be a sign that maybe its wrong? i know a loss is a loss, and i'm sure she feels bad....but i just find it difficult to feel sorry when it was a choice unlike a miscarriage.

ok.....let the bashings begin!!!![/b]
Taken from YOUR blinkie - "I am not perfect, I am forgiven."
Maybe providing compassion and understanding for all women who are in pain is what is needed rather than judgement.
[/b]
i'm NOT perfect and THANK GOD i'm forgiven!! that being said, since i'm not perfect, i don't always do the right thing. i have problems doing the right thing and forgiving(i'm human!!!!) when i'm "supposed" to. and for the record....i do provide compassion.....i have so much compassion for those precious innocent babies that are no longer with us.
[/b][/quote]

I think compassion comes from having the maturity and selflessness to recognize that everyone has a story and has made painful choices based on their own story. You are not "supposed" to do anything - forgiving because the bible tells you to do it ( rather than recognizing the pain and having compassion for women who have had abortions ) is wasted energy.
[/b][/quote]
i'm a little confused.....forgiving is wasted energy????
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Kristin, proud Air Force wife to Kevin(since 01.20.06)
Mommy to Kaylynn Grace(11.20.06), Jackson William(3.18.08),
Carsyn Olivia(9.5.09), and Noah Cauthen(10.27.11)


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  #19  
June 30th, 2007, 01:34 PM
eash's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Posts: 1,969
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(eashley @ Jun 30 2007, 01:31 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
<div class='quotemain'>
Quote:
its very hard for me to say. i'm sure i'm "closed minded" or something , but its hard for me to grasp that someone who PURPOSELY removed a pregnancy feels a loss.....no....let me rephrase that. if they feel that it is a loss, wouldn't that be a sign that maybe its wrong? i know a loss is a loss, and i'm sure she feels bad....but i just find it difficult to feel sorry when it was a choice unlike a miscarriage.

ok.....let the bashings begin!!!![/b]
Taken from YOUR blinkie - "I am not perfect, I am forgiven."
Maybe providing compassion and understanding for all women who are in pain is what is needed rather than judgement.
[/b]
i'm NOT perfect and THANK GOD i'm forgiven!! that being said, since i'm not perfect, i don't always do the right thing. i have problems doing the right thing and forgiving(i'm human!!!!) when i'm "supposed" to. and for the record....i do provide compassion.....i have so much compassion for those precious innocent babies that are no longer with us.
[/b]
I think compassion comes from having the maturity and selflessness to recognize that everyone has a story and has made painful choices based on their own story. You are not "supposed" to do anything - forgiving because the bible tells you to do it ( rather than recognizing the pain and having compassion for women who have had abortions ) is wasted energy.
[/b][/quote]
i'm a little confused.....forgiving is wasted energy????
[/b][/quote]

Forgiving because the bible, preacher, Jesus, whoever, tells you to is wasted energy. Having compassion and understanding for women who have had abortions is, in my opinion, where energy should be spent.
( I don't feel that women who have had abortions need forgiving - that would imply that the act was wrong.)
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  #20  
June 30th, 2007, 03:13 PM
wifey2kevin's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(mommy2kaylee-bug @ Jun 30 2007, 03:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
<div class='quotemain'>
Quote:
<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(mommy2kaylee-bug @ Jun 30 2007, 12:20 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
<div class='quotemain'>its very hard for me to say. i'm sure i'm "closed minded" or something , but its hard for me to grasp that someone who PURPOSELY removed a pregnancy feels a loss.....no....let me rephrase that. if they feel that it is a loss, wouldn't that be a sign that maybe its wrong? i know a loss is a loss, and i'm sure she feels bad....but i just find it difficult to feel sorry when it was a choice unlike a miscarriage.

ok.....let the bashings begin!!!![/b]
Taken from YOUR blinkie - "I am not perfect, I am forgiven."
Maybe providing compassion and understanding for all women who are in pain is what is needed rather than judgement.
[/b]
i'm NOT perfect and THANK GOD i'm forgiven!! that being said, since i'm not perfect, i don't always do the right thing. i have problems doing the right thing and forgiving(i'm human!!!!) when i'm "supposed" to. and for the record....i do provide compassion.....i have so much compassion for those precious innocent babies that are no longer with us.
[/b][/quote]

I think compassion comes from having the maturity and selflessness to recognize that everyone has a story and has made painful choices based on their own story. You are not "supposed" to do anything - forgiving because the bible tells you to do it ( rather than recognizing the pain and having compassion for women who have had abortions ) is wasted energy.
[/b][/quote]
i'm a little confused.....forgiving is wasted energy????
[/b][/quote]

Forgiving because the bible, preacher, Jesus, whoever, tells you to is wasted energy. Having compassion and understanding for women who have had abortions is, in my opinion, where energy should be spent.
( I don't feel that women who have had abortions need forgiving - that would imply that the act was wrong.)
[/b][/quote]

ok...i understand what you mean now.....but this is where we disagree. i believe that abortion is wrong so they do need forgiveness.
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Mommy to Kaylynn Grace(11.20.06), Jackson William(3.18.08),
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