Log In Sign Up

would you abort if you were raped?


Abortion Debate

This forum is for Abortion debate only. If you are highly sensitive about this topic, read at your own discretion.

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

View Poll Results: Would you abort if you were raped?
yes most definitely 91 25.49%
no absolutely not 166 46.50%
not sure 100 28.01%
Voters: 357. You may not vote on this poll

Like Tree1Likes

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Abortion Debate LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #81  
May 13th, 2009, 09:25 AM
Momof4Boyz's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Florida
Posts: 8,212
Send a message via MSN to Momof4Boyz
No way! It's not the baby's fault. I certainly would do whatever it took to put my rapist behind bars for as long as possible but I wouldn't punish a child that IS biologically half mine for something it had no choice over, it didn't ask to be made.
__________________


Facebook
Reply With Quote
  #82  
May 14th, 2009, 10:13 PM
Keepin' it real!
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,656
Let me first say I REALLY pray I never have to face this scenario! That said, I would NOT abort my baby. Even if some jerk did do something to me, I am capable enough of raising my own child OR giving said child up to a couple who is childless, rather than taking his/her innocent life. The child didn't ask to either be conceived or killed. I would want to give my baby a chance. After all, he or she would still be mine.
__________________
Lynn
Mom to many



1 Girl 2011 and 1 Boy 2013. Their family is COMPLETE!

Surrogacy # 3 for new family?: 2014??
Reply With Quote
  #83  
May 17th, 2009, 09:21 AM
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 28
I find it interesting that so many of the women that voted no say "it is not the baby's fault" - like the women that said yes or maybe are saying it is...anyways....

I hope I will never be in this situation but if I am am - I would certainly consider an abortion.
Reply With Quote
  #84  
October 19th, 2009, 09:50 PM
AmandaR
Guest
Posts: n/a
I would have the baby. If I had ill feelings toward the baby, I would put him or her up for adoption. It's NOT the baby's fault it was conceived from rape.
Reply With Quote
  #85  
October 28th, 2009, 07:15 PM
IAmMomMomIAm
Guest
Posts: n/a
Assuming that a pregnancy would not affect my physical health (i.e. no massive physical trauma that would make carrying a baby overly dangerous), I can say with some confidence that I wouldn't have an abortion. Obviously I would have to talk to my husband about whether he wants to raise another man's child. I would talk to my church leaders (though I already know my church supports [but doesn't encourage] abortion under the circumstances of rape, incest, or the health of the mother). It would require extensive prayer before I made a final decision either way. Given my religious beliefs.. I don't think I could do it though.

I don't mean the religious beliefs that "every life is sacred" or the basic things. LDS believe that we exist as spirits in Heaven, and then receive a physical body on Earth (for various reasons). I can't see myself taking away someone else's earthly experience unless it was dangerous for me to have a child. And then it's only marginally okay because I know that if I died not only would that spirit not get a body, but I wouldn't be able to provide bodies for other Spirits either.

It sounds really weird when explained in vague detail. But suffice to say: I don't think it's my place to decide if someone else lives or dies - fetus, child, adult, rapist, murderer.. it's not my place.

Last edited by IAmMomMomIAm; October 28th, 2009 at 07:19 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #86  
November 13th, 2009, 05:48 PM
MrsAndMommy
Guest
Posts: n/a
Not personally, no. I never became pregnant from situations that happened to me but for me, I just couldn't handle it. Mentally, it would cause more anguish for me.
Reply With Quote
  #87  
November 16th, 2009, 05:58 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Ontario
Posts: 10,864
I voted not sure. Right at this moment I say-Yes, most definitely. However, unless I am in that situation (god forbid), I will never know. Hearts change with each situation.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #88  
November 16th, 2009, 11:29 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 2,225
I voted not sure. I would hope that I would have the fortitude to carry the baby to term, and then to decide whether to keep it, or give it up for adoption, but given that I've never even come CLOSE to the emotional trauma of a rape, I can't say for sure how I would react.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #89  
November 19th, 2009, 03:13 PM
Mom4Life_11's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 8,466
yes most definitely
__________________




Reply With Quote
  #90  
November 21st, 2009, 10:30 AM
aussiemummy
Guest
Posts: n/a
I doubt I would. Seriously doubt it. But I can't really say either way. I'm pro life but who knows...in that situation I could change my mind.
Reply With Quote
  #91  
November 21st, 2009, 04:44 PM
lilflower
Guest
Posts: n/a
This is an interesting debate. Very heated. I am a rape baby. My mother was pro-choice and still decided to keep me because I am still HER child regardless of how I came to exist. I would like to think I would do the same thing she did in that situation because I am very grateful to be here today and my mother cannot imagine her life without me.
Reply With Quote
  #92  
November 22nd, 2009, 05:56 AM
aussiemummy
Guest
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilflower View Post
This is an interesting debate. Very heated. I am a rape baby. My mother was pro-choice and still decided to keep me because I am still HER child regardless of how I came to exist. I would like to think I would do the same thing she did in that situation because I am very grateful to be here today and my mother cannot imagine her life without me.
That really does put things in perspective. I'm glad you shared your story with us.
Reply With Quote
  #93  
November 22nd, 2009, 06:31 PM
lilflower
Guest
Posts: n/a
Thanks. I think you replied in my other post. In the main room on declawing.

I know it's a situation that cannot be determined until it happens, which is an awful thing to think about, but I am 100% grateful that I'm here because she could have aborted and none of her family would have judged her for doing it. I can't say that I definitely wouldn't abort, but I would hope that I would be able to find the courage to at least give the baby up. It happens a lot more than people think. And rape can be by anyone. My father was a perfect stranger, and she ended up reporting it and he got put in jail and they wouldn't let him have any parental rights and my step-dad ended up adopting me.

But anyways now that I'm rambling...thanks for replying.
Reply With Quote
  #94  
November 23rd, 2009, 10:57 AM
proudjmmom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 6,471
I'm not sure what i would do. I am very pro-life, but under these circumstances, i think i would consider it. It would depend on so many things.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #95  
November 30th, 2009, 02:25 PM
mrsrowe2b
Guest
Posts: n/a
IMPO, it would have to depend on the physical and emotional trauma that was left with me after being raped.

I'd rather not have an abortion, but if seeing my baby everyday of his/her life brings back those horrible memories, how could I possibly face that? How could you not feel a need to save your child from having to see that disgust in your eyes for the man that did that to you?
Reply With Quote
  #96  
December 1st, 2009, 10:53 AM
mama_reese's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,577
I think I can completely honestly say I wouldn't have an abortion if I was raped. Ever. I am very pro-life, so I know I could never do it. I think (for me personally) the trauma of aborting my baby would be more traumatic than the rape itself. I know I couldn't do it. If I didnt think I could live everyday seeing the baby, I would carry it to term and go the adoption route. But I hope that I would think of the baby still being mine, no matter who the father was or what kind of evil things he did.
__________________




Reply With Quote
  #97  
December 11th, 2009, 05:18 PM
~InHisHands~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: US - Alabama
Posts: 12,675
No! That baby is a life & I would not murder him/her. Besides if I got pg it would be a miracle since I have suffered from infertility that I know of almost 4 long years. I do admit though at one time I would have said "not sure" but not anymore... def not!
__________________

A&A Art ~ My TTC Blog ~ My Pics

"Never confuse acceptance with approval. Without approving
all we do, Jesus accepts all who come to Him." ~
Rick Warren



CLICK HERE to read about my mission trip to Romania! CLICK HERE to see pics!
Reply With Quote
  #98  
December 13th, 2009, 08:26 AM
Calendula's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 1,513
Reaction 1: Having an abortion would feel like me helping my rapist dominate and destroy another life, like I feel he did to mine.

Reaction 2: Carrying this baby would feel like giving him physical control of my body for at least another 9 months, when I already feel like he still has mental control over me.

I can only imagine, being faced with a pregnancy, I would continue to relentlessly vacillate between those two extremes. I cannot honestly say which reaction would win out, only that either would have massive repercussions for a woman when it comes to further trauma and healing.

I could not judge a woman for making whichever decision helped her to regain a small feeling of control and autonomy. I don't think even someone who has 'been there' (been raped, helped a loved on recover, etc) can judge any other persons' responses to it.
__________________



Reply With Quote
  #99  
December 13th, 2009, 02:42 PM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
Guest
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilflower View Post
This is an interesting debate. Very heated. I am a rape baby. My mother was pro-choice and still decided to keep me because I am still HER child regardless of how I came to exist. I would like to think I would do the same thing she did in that situation because I am very grateful to be here today and my mother cannot imagine her life without me.
I think that's really cool your mom was able to keep you and have those feelings.


I'm in a position where I have a 28 month old girl, and an awful birth experience which I had to seek counseling for. (I even call it a rape.) I have a great husband that I've been with since I was 16. If I was raped and then a pregnancy resulted in that rape, I don't know what I'd do. I don't know if I can expect dh to love a new baby like the way he loves his own dd. The anxiety of birth, the anxiety of dh's reaction to that whole pregnancy/birth process and actually dealing with the trauma of the rape would so hard to say an answer.. even giving up the baby? *I* don't know if I could do that either.
Reply With Quote
  #100  
December 15th, 2009, 10:55 AM
.Froggy.'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: The sticks,South Carolina
Posts: 1,264
Having been raped when I was 10 and knowing the physical and emotional trauma from it I still voted no. It was in no way the child's fault, I don't want to live the rest of my life hurting and wondering "what if I didn't abort" because of what someone did to me. I would have the chance to change that hurt and I would, I would not abort. Now I most certainly cannot give you a clear answer as to if I would keep the child after birth or not but I know in my heart from going through it I wouldn't abort MY child because of rape.

I don't think you can base an actual decision on something like this unless you have actually gone through it and it really does anger me when people who say "this is what rape does" and have never been through it, as with any other decision it is personal and every one is different. What matters is what I KNOW I WOULD do if that situation presented itself to me again.
__________________

Thank youmisfitnm 4 my siggy. PRO-LIFE mommy!! 4 month ECB milestone!!

Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:10 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0