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I'm 35 and having my 3rd c-section... my ob offered to perform a tubal ligation at the time of the baby's birth. I thought I would be all for it as I am happy with three kids... yet each time he has asked me (he just mentions at each appt as I think he forgets from previously) I have hesitated.
Mostly because he said that I had to think whether this was definitely the last child I wanted, regardless of my dh, regardless of my kids' health (ie. if I would get pregnant if one of them were sick and a baby could potentially help save them). It really got me thinking... even about SIDS. I don't think I would ever want to 'replace' my baby but I've found the decision so hard because you never know what the future holds or how I would feel about having another baby if something happened.
Anyway at my 31 week appt he asked me and I still hesitated and so he said he's not going to do it!! I guess that is probably wise.. to have someone hesitating so close to full term probably means it's best for him not to do it!!
Dh agrees although he was mostly thinking of a higher risk of infection by carrying out a further procedure.
Lenore, I completely understand. Despite the fact that I have had quite a few health issues recently that were brought on by my pregnancy, and we are almost entirely certain that we are content with three, I still am hesitating. DH keeps talking about getting a vasectomy and I'm not quite ready to sign off on that even though I am pretty sure that I don't want to put my body through the stress of pregnancy again. I think you are right (and your OB is right) to pay attention to your hesitation and your DH is right too. Why add the risk of infection? You could always do it later if and when you are more certain. Do you have a CS date yet???
You know Marie, I would really have to look into IUDs as I've never known anyone who's had one!! That might seem odd, but I just don't think it's used as much over here. I mean I guess it must be used though, maybe just not in my circle of friends..
Heather, you sound like you know exactly what I'm talking about! It's like I'm pretty definite 3 children are just right for me, but taking away the OPTION altogether...well that's just huge ! My c-section date is 3 weeks away - Tue 13th April when I'm exactly 39 weeks. (excitement for meeting the baby, not the c-section!!)
Thanks to Meganpixel for my beautiful siggie!
Last edited by mum74; March 23rd, 2010 at 03:28 PM.
I honestly had not thought about it much before getting pg, but it had crossed my mind a time or 2. But since learning DH is infertile, I was relieved to not have to make that choice. That's been one part of his MFI that has been so easy to handle. I hope that makes sense. Even now that some of the ladies in the DDC are already stressing over birth control after our LOs arrive, it is nice to know that I don't have that worry.
I'm glad Lenore, your doc is not going ahead. With your hesitation, I'd wait to. And I can't wait to meet your LO too!!! April 13th isn't that far off either!!!
APril 13th will be here before we know it!! I can't wait to meet your little one either!!
Glad your doctor decided not to do the tl, especially since you are hesitating now. Keeps you from also making a decision in the heat of the moment that you might regret later.
DH and I have talked about what we are going to do when we are sure we are done, most likely he gets to have a vasectomy.
April 13th is SO CLOSE!! Can't wait to meet your new addition! I too am glad your doc isn't going to do the tubal because of your hesitation....very observant he is. And you thought he had just been forgetting