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weaning help...please! desperate!


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  #1  
February 28th, 2013, 11:26 PM
acupofjoe's Avatar Proud mama of three!
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Location: washington state.
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Ok so i want my almost 14 month old to wean. My other two kida i let selfwean and i am not doing that again...oldeat weaned at two and half and ds a little after three but he still asks for it anyways i need her weaned. I do not like it at all, i dont enjoy it and i feel like it makea my skin crawl when she is nursing. I do feel bad but i cant take it anymore...ive felt likethis the past month and half. I cant really describe the feeling when she is latched other than its a dreaded feeling and i very much cant stand it. i dont know how to wean her...i already am away at work a lot during the day and she wants it to fall asleep at night. I dont know if i hate it this bad because ive done it the past six yrs straight or what but this needa to end. The other night i couldnt take it anymore and let her scream in her room for almost an hour and the kid is so stubborn for it she would have screamed all night if id have left her there. Anyways any advice?? If i am around she has to nurse and as much as i love her and dont want to traumatize her i am regretting even nursing at all to begin with.



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Nessa proud married working mother of three kids in Washington state. Trying to raise our family of five as LDS. Taking life one day at a time.
Jordan - 6 yr; Stan - 4 yr; & Tyler - 2 yr.
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  #2  
March 1st, 2013, 04:53 AM
*Kiliki*'s Avatar i have absolute power
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hmmm wish I had some advice for you....I felt like that with Raianna though....she nursed every 30mins-an hour....until I just started giving her formula....it took her a long while to even accept the bottle (even with breast milk in it) but she eventually did....can you pump and put the breast milk in a sippy cup for her for a while and then start adding milk to it til eventually its all milk it might make it easier for her to take a cup that way?
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  #3  
March 1st, 2013, 05:13 AM
joonzgurl's Avatar Proud mama of 2 girls
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How many times per day is she nursing, and for what (nap times? bedtimes obviously, when else?)
How does she go to sleep when you are not around?
Does she take milk or milk alternatives in a cup?
Does she have a bedtime routine? What is it?

We are currently weaning as well, down to 1x per day, going to cut out the last feed (nap time) as soon as I am feeling better from the morning sickness. Because Avery will cry and cry too for nursing and it hurt my heart to just let her cry. So anyways once I know these answers I may have some advice for you.
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  #4  
March 1st, 2013, 08:02 AM
~mommy~'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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offer her milk or whatever in a bottle or cup whatever you are using instead when she wants to nurse.
if she fusses just busy yourself with something else, making it her only option.
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  #5  
March 2nd, 2013, 09:28 PM
acupofjoe's Avatar Proud mama of three!
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She does drink milk from a sippie but she gets no comfort from it and i think thats what she is "needing" when she wants to nurse. She drinks from it just fine but she will still scream for boob if thats what she is wanting, lol. I wish it was that easy!


How many times per day is she nursing, and for what (nap times? bedtimes obviously, when else?) that really depends on the day and what time i am working but usually id say anywhere from three to eight times a day/night total.
she also wants it at bedtime and naptime if i am the one home and putting her to sleep.

How does she go to sleep when you are not around? dh usually rocks her to sleep in her carseat or he lays by her in bed until she passes out and she is quick for him. no fighting it for nursing and she is out within ten minutes at the most but its like if she sees me she KNOWS that means mama has the boobs, lol.

Does she take milk or milk alternatives in a cup? yep she drinks just fine from a sippy.

Does she have a bedtime routine? What is it? yes we have same thing for all kids just depends on who is home on who does it: dinner by 5, bath shortly after (baby is every other day because she screams bloody murder in the tub and i just cant handle that to be honest so every other day is fine for her) on her off days she hangs in the bathroom with us and watches siblings during their bath. after bath we do lotions/pjs...i do her while doing others. we play for about half hour and then one story and straight to bed.

After our story I or DH tuck older two into bed and then we either rock her, lay by her or let her cry for a bit. If its dh she goes straight to bed, if its me she will fight me for hours for nursing.
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Jordan - 6 yr; Stan - 4 yr; & Tyler - 2 yr.
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  #6  
March 3rd, 2013, 04:05 AM
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With my DD i went cold turkey, it seemed harsh but it worked. I gave her a pumped bottle only at night for a week. During the day she had formula. My pediatritian said she will catch on but the important part is making a plan and sticking to it. It took a week to fully ween her and she was fussy for another week after that. Good luck and keep us updated.
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  #7  
March 5th, 2013, 05:41 AM
joonzgurl's Avatar Proud mama of 2 girls
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Location: Small Town, Alberta, Canada
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Thanks for all your answers!

I think that given her age, you need to wean her gently. She is old enough now to definitely know about nursing and she will definitely miss it. They just get so attached when they get older, ya know?

I think first thing I would do is work on cutting out the daytime feeds. Figure out her pattern and cut out one at a time. Don't cut out more than 1 every 3 days.

Also, TALK to her. Explain that "mommy doesn't feel good right now, you can have some milk at x time" and offer her something else. Try to distract.

I would cut out bedtime and naptime last. First thing is I would have DH putting her to bed every single night despite you being home. Is that possible? At first we would do her routine and I would nurse her on the couch, then dH would do stories and rock her to sleep. Soon enough I stopped nursing on the couch and she just went to sleep fine with daddy.

I honestly don't think that is a quick fix here. I think it is going to take time and I wouldn't plan to have her weaned any quicker than 1-2 months from now.

What has worked best for us has just been explaining to her (mommy feels yucky, you can have some at nap time, or you are a big girl now, you can have a snack instead) is what has helped us best. She seems to accept it better when we explain, even if she might not 100% get it.

Also, if she is really crying for it one day, why not go ahead and nurse her? There is always tomorrow to work on weaning. It might feel like a step back but as long as you are continually working towards you goal you will get there.

Also could you try to find a book on weaning? We have one on night weaning and it really helped a lot.

Congrats on making it over 12 months, what an accomplishment!
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  #8  
March 6th, 2013, 12:26 AM
acupofjoe's Avatar Proud mama of three!
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Thanks for all the tips! I will look into a book on weaning as well
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Nessa proud married working mother of three kids in Washington state. Trying to raise our family of five as LDS. Taking life one day at a time.
Jordan - 6 yr; Stan - 4 yr; & Tyler - 2 yr.
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  #9  
March 6th, 2013, 06:27 AM
~mommy~'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Hold her on your lap (snuggle) while she drinks. I still do that with my 21 mo when she wants to. I did it with my 3.5 yo as well and she never really wants to snuggle any more for that. We of course will still snuggle on the couch, but she doesn't need me for her drinks anymore. I assume dd3 will be the same and wean herself from needing me at drink time. I weaned 21 mo around 14 mo.
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