We pride ourselves on having the friendliest
and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment
for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers.
If you have any problems registering please drop an email to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!
I think I want to request a copy of my medical records from my midwives IF information about the delivery would be in there. Last night we were talking and my husband told me (in the midst of apologizing for his tirade the other night about how I would never go into labor on my own - you were ladies who said it was motivated by fear and trauma) that Claire's nuchal cord (which I knew about) was wrapped several times around her neck and shortened to the point that he was told her head literally could not reach my cervix and they believe that's why I never went into spontaneous labor, why my cervix wouldn't dilate, and why the pitocin and the epi combo almost killed her. They never said anything about that to me and I'm wondering if he's remembering wrong or something bc it seems odd I would just NOW be hearing about this. SO I wanted to see if my chart said anything about that. I'm not sure what I hope to gain from that exactly - I just feel like I NEED to know. I guess maybe I think the odds of a baby getting that badly entangled are so slim that if that really is why everything happened the way it did - than I would have a lot more hope for future pregnancies. But I'm not sure how to go about this......
Also I'm a little concerned that I may find out things I don't want to know by looking at a record of that day. Anyone think I'm better off leaving it be????
I also wanted to add that while I love my husband and trust him implicitly, I wouldn't put it past him to lie to me in an effort to help me find closure with all this. If Claire really was noosed that badly then labor never would have started on its own - no matter how long I waited - with a good outcome. And if I hadn't been induced and on monitors, they wouldn't necessarily have known she was in distress or have responded as quickly as they did. If I hadn't been so out of my mind in pain on pitocin, I would have had more reserves of strength to refuse interventions which might have resulted in a fatal delay to the cesarean. This is all his logic last night. So he said that while it would have been optimal if they could have seen the cord problem on an u/s or something and spared me the trauma of the induction, the way things progressed was the next best scenario to deliver a live baby. It seems plausible. But I just can't help but wonder - especially this long after the fact - if he's making it up to help me heal.....
My daughter is perfect, but her birth was not. If you or someone you love is struggling to cope with a traumatic childbirth experience, please visit http://www.solaceformothers.org/
I'd think there'd have to be something about the delivery in your charts. I think you should definately request them. Even if you happen to see something in there that you really don't want to know about, if you're going to plan on having another baby, you kinda need to know what it is so you can make an informed decision on how to go about the birth.
I think it's definately possible that that is what happened and you're just finding it out. For some reason.. even after you're holding your safe, healthy baby, doctors, husbands, and even your own mother seem to think it's better that they spare you any of the not so great details about the birth.. mine did that to me with both of my boys. I knew when Noah came out he had the cord wrapped around his neck, but I was told it was wrapped around his neck once and the doctor was able to untangle it before he was all of his body was even out, but what I found out 8 months later was that the cord was wrapped tight around his neck twice, that the doctor had tried to unwind it before fully delivering him but couldn't and that Noah was actually a deep blue color (no wonder he made no sound when he came out). Then with Nicky, after he was born, the nurses and DH had him over at the station where they weight him and such FOREVER and I was told that was because the scale was giving them trouble they couldn't get an accurate weight on him, but I found out 2 months later that they actually were having trouble getting all the fluid out of his lungs and that because of that he wasn't breathing the best and the only reason I found that out was because my DH explained it to the specialist we'd taken Nicky to (after he choked and caused me to call 911 ) when the doctor asked about Nicky's birth. I think.. especially our husband.. think they are protecting us if they don't tell us all the bad things that happened but eventually it all does come out.
If that is what happened with your daughter, while it definately wasn't a good thing to go through, it can kinda be good news because really what are the odds of that happening twice?? I would think that if that's what happened, your husband should have no gripes about a VBAC.. I can still understand hesitation at a homebirth after everything you guys went through, but a VBAC would seem completely doable.
__________________ Andrea, Mama to.. Noah (2006), Nickolas (2007), Alyzabeth (2008), and Savannah (2010)
Many Many Thanks to GraysMama (Chelsea) for my AMAZING Siggy!!!
I got my records when Bry was about 8w old and I was a little disappointed at the amount of information in them. I expected them to say exactly what was wrong with her, etc. at birth but they didn't. They just said "induced analgesic free vaginal delivery that mom and dad are pleased with"
i found them helpful, but not what I was hoping for :\ I would get them though. it might be different in your situation!
December 9, 2013
5:20PM 8lb3oz 20.5"
Hospital water birth
I think it depends on the hospital. I went to a different clinic with my second baby, and the doctor I saw surprised me by having read my records from the last pregnancy before my first appointment with her.
I've never seen my records, but I know that the records from my first birth are somewhat detailed. With my son, I was stuck at 9cm for 5 hours. Nobody acted like it was a big deal or cause for concern. "Failure to Progress" or "c-section" where never mentioned to me. They just kept checking me every once in a while to see if I was ready. But apparently it was noted in my charts that I stalled for so long. I was surprised when my new doctor told me that my charts indicated that I had a difficult delivery with my first. She told me that typically, with a stall like that so far along, that they begin to worry that the baby won't fit (either too big or poorly positioned). So even though it was not treated as an issue, it was noted in my charts.
Chels, it could be that they don't know what was wrong with Brylie. They weren't able to find anything definitive for why my daughter had such a rough start from my pregnancy records, labor records, lab tests on the placenta, lab tests run on my blood, and tests run on my daughter's blood. I was told at my 6-week appointment that there was a "round table" type of meeting once a quarter where the OBs, NICU doctors, and pathologist discuss odd cases and that my daughter's would probably be brought up at that. I never heard anything from it.
Mama to a lower elementary school boy, preschool girl, and my miracle baby girl.
Two 10w losses (11/2010 + 8/2011)