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Daughter in Delivery room


Forum: Labor and Childbirth

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  #1  
December 30th, 2012, 03:21 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 52
I have an 11 year old daughter. (to be specific, if it is relevant, she is my stepdaughter but that title is rarely if ever spoken in our home, and she lives with us full time). She really wants to be in the delievery room when her little brother is born. She has attended every ultrasound and is very involved. She has been dubbed "alternate coach". The doctor has no issues with her being in the delivery room (sans any last minute emergencies) and the hospital accepted the letter the doctor wrote to wave the last month before she turns twelve. (hospital policy said 12 unless written consent from doctor). Hubby and I have shown her some very graphic videos from YouTube of delivery and she still wants it.

Has anyone ever had thier older children in the room with them during delivery? Do you know thier opinions after delivery? How did you feel about it?
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  #2  
January 2nd, 2013, 10:58 AM
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Location: Atlantic Canada
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It sounds like your daughter is ready to be part of her little brother's birth! It's good that you've been honest with her and shown her what to expect. Just make sure she has the option to leave the room if it gets to be too much for her.
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  #3  
February 8th, 2013, 03:28 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Urchin View Post
Just make sure she has the option to leave the room if it gets to be too much for her.
I agree. If you have prepared her by letting her watch videos related to child birth and if she understands what giving birth is, then I guess she can be in the delivery room. But as what urchin said, she must have the option to leave anytime she wants.
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  #4  
March 17th, 2013, 12:13 PM
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Posts: 106
If you are both comfortable, I think it's a wonderful idea. We "baby" children far too much in our society, and with the correct context and framework, even much younger children are capable of understanding and embracing the facts of life -- both joyous and sad -- without being traumatized. Many 11 year olds are capable of being mature and knowledgeable about many things, like birth.

I agree that she should be prepared to be "kicked out" if there is an emergency -- like you end up needing a C section -- and that she should be prepared to see you in a considerable amount of pain and distress. I don't think it's the blood or the baby coming out of the vagina that would bother a young girl, but rather seeing someone she loves and obviously is close to suffer. Maybe have some talks with her about how nature makes sure it is all worth it because what you feel as soon as the baby is out "erases" the pain. Anyway, it sounds like you have a close and loving relationship and will be able to address any questions she has so good luck with a smooth labour and delivery!
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  #5  
March 17th, 2013, 12:14 PM
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If you are both comfortable, I think it's a wonderful idea. We "baby" children far too much in our society, and with the correct context and framework, even much younger children are capable of understanding and embracing the facts of life -- both joyous and sad -- without being traumatized. Many 11 year olds are capable of being mature and knowledgeable about many things, like birth.

I agree that she should be prepared to be "kicked out" if there is an emergency -- like you end up needing a C section -- and that she should be prepared to see you in a considerable amount of pain and distress. I don't think it's the blood or the baby coming out of the vagina that would bother a young girl, but rather seeing someone she loves and obviously is close to suffer. Maybe have some talks with her about how nature makes sure it is all worth it because what you feel as soon as the baby is out "erases" the pain. Anyway, it sounds like you have a close and loving relationship and will be able to address any questions she has so good luck with a smooth labour and delivery!
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  #6  
April 3rd, 2013, 12:15 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 25
i was 16 when my mom gave birth to my baby brother. i really wanted to be with her inside the delivery room but the doctors and nurses said that if a women that never gave birth, and so young, can be traumatized and will never want to have kids in her life..
don't know if its true but i didn't go in..
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