[Banned-ZoesMom]

I lost Bean at this stage of my pregnancy. 4w0d. I guess I was scared it would happen again and I needed reassurance that I was even pregnant. I guess even with a level of 47 that still tells me I am, and with my darkening lines, that helps too. Now I just have to make it through 6w2d, and I think I'll breathe an even bigger sigh of relief. That is when I lost Rice.

[mommy jenn]

im glad you feeling better. is eveything ok now? no more problems??? im sure you will be fine. stressing is normal and natural

[Banned-ZoesMom]

As soon as I find out my levels are doubling, I'll be okay, no more stressing..but I probably will still worry a bit. As soon as I see a heartbeat, we'll be golden.

[victorialv]

can I make a suggestion? After you get your first set of levels back, stop doing them. You will only stress yourself out, like I did. I was much happier not knowing, than VERY ANXIOUSLY/NERVOUSLY waiitng for those darn levels to come back.

[amandakay29]

I just want to say you are going to go through all sorts of emotions during this pregnancy. Every symptom, every loss of symptom will send you into a straight panic. I can attest for this. After having my positive pregnancy test. I wouldn't believe I was pregnant until I was a week late for my period. Then at week 6 or 7 my boobs weren't as tender as they were before...I freaked out. I cried all day thinking I had lost the baby. Then I hit week 8...a few days before I lost our little bean....we were getting ready to fly home to Missouri. We were sitting in the airport and I had been cramping with a backache all day. I had what I would consider a panic attack. I couldn't not quit crying...I just knew I was going to lose the baby...My poor husband was trying to get me to leave the airport so we could go home and call the doctor but I wouldn't listen. We flew home anyway...I wasn't bleeding so I knew the E.R. wouldn't do an ultrasound. And the I got sick...sick sick sick. I had horrible morning sickness but this was 3 times worse. We finally got home and I called the dr.'s office....they had me come in...I had lost 7 lbs in 5 days. She did the ultrasound...and there was our little one...heart just beating like crazy. I had a stomach bug. I still go through moments of "Man I feel too good, something's wrong with the little one" and then the next morning I'm throwing up or I have a headache or something.

I wish there was something I could say or do to help take the fears away. But I can tell you what you are feeling and going through is completely normal. I told the dr. the first time...I'm crazy...All I can do is cry with this pregnancy....the response..."You had a loss, you're not crazy, it's completely normal" Please take care of yourself and your little one. Good luck.

[Banned-ZoesMom]

Thanks for the encouraging words. I refuse to think anymore positive thoughts regarding this pregnancy because I know in my heart I will be holding this little peanut in 36 weeks. As for the levels, my doctor will probably order them every other day for the next week just to make sure they continue to double, and once they hit 1000, I'll have an ultrasound, but that won't be until I come back from the honeymoon.