Forum: Trying to Conceive after Loss
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Mom of 2 beautiful girls!
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Michigan
Posts: 8,906
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 I feel like I dont fit in anywhere anymore. I love all you girls here and try to help where ever I can but I know its hard to hear about someone who is pg so I try to limit my responces. I also feel like I dont really fit in at PAL just because it seems like the girls over have bonded and I just dont feel that bond yet. I also am starting to feel very disconnected from my DDC that I hardely go over there anymore. Its like because I dont spend a lot of time over there that I get over looked. KWIM It was hard for me in the beginning to really join them because I was afraid that I would have to leave there like the past DDC's but still. I've tryed to join some of their activities and get no where. And the one host always says pm this person for this. Thought that was part of their job?? Sorry I know I'm venting but I just want to fit in somewhere anywhere.
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Thank you Helen for my beautiful siggy!
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Rochester, NY
Posts: 15,518
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AWW sweetie...
You fit in here! Just because you are pregnant doesn't make you not TTCAL at heart. Just post here and put PG mentioned in the title, or post it in the subforum with a note here for us to check there.
PAL is full of TTCAL'ers but I think the problem is most girls there are now pretty busy and don't post as much.
I hear ya about DDC's. I am not even going to join one when I get PG...well... if some of the girls here are with me I might  But I am not going alone 
Post where you feel at home. I do check PAL at least 6 times a day
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Bobbie mom to : Jeremy (21) Amanda (17) Matthew (3) and Daniel (20 months) step-mom to: Stephany(21) and Krista (18)
step-grandma to: Wesley (23 months)
On 1/31 at exactly 16 weeks pregnant Noah came too soon. He was our 7th loss  If you would like to see pictures of my sweet (but tiny) boy they can be viewed at www.caringbridge.org/visit/noahdarrohn they aren't the easiest pitures to look at but I am willing to share them with anyone who would like to see them <3
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 3,594
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Oh Angie! I hope you don't ever feel like you don't fit in over here...
Hearing about your pregnancies gives us ladies hope that there is a rainbow after the storm...I'm sorry your DDC is being so "shun" like...I've noticed that alot of DDCs are that way...alot of new people to JM join directly into their DDC and they don't really get to know JM first...and as for PAL..I'm kind of surprised that they aren't more accepting...they seem like a lot of nice women...I'm sure if you made a post about how you felt they'd be willing to open up to you...
Sorry you are feeling so down...just remember your TTCAL girls love you!!
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Sunny California
Posts: 9,815
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I'm sorry....but I have to agree with Bobbie, you fit here  It's nice to hear about all the girls that are getting pg, it's hope for those of us that are still trying.
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Mom of 2 beautiful girls!
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Michigan
Posts: 8,906
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Thank you girls. I cant wait till you all get your BFP's. Maybe its the hormones but I'm a wreck today. I feel like I'm going to cry at the drop of a hat. I dont know what it is about today but its going to be a long day.
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Thank you Helen for my beautiful siggy!
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Nebraska
Posts: 3,312
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Awww, Angie, I'm sorry you're feeling down and left out! I feel that way quite frequently myself, even here. Everyone is sooo nice, but it's definitely hard coming in and being the new person trying to make friends.
Can I just say though.....  I'd be thrilled to be part of whatever board you were on, because I think you're so sweet and friendly. 
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Mom of 2 beautiful girls!
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Michigan
Posts: 8,906
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Aww thank you. You are so sweet to say that.
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Thank you Helen for my beautiful siggy!
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Bremerton, Wa
Posts: 4,400
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Angie Big You do fit in here!!! Please dont hesitate to post here. like Bobbie said just put pg mentioned in the subject, you know we all read it anyways We absolutly love you!! I know when i first came here, you and Bobbie were some of the first women to make me feel at home. Now it is only fair we do the same for you!
Im sure part of it is those hormones, but please please dont ever feel like you dont fit in here. I know PAL is funny sometimes. The ladies over there dont post nearly as much as over here, and i know it seems like the 3rd trimester mommies kinda band together, but they do try to respond to everyone. It is just a much slower board. Please dont leave TTCAL ever!
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 1,254
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I just wanted to tell you I totally know how you are feeling! I know that no one means it to be intentional but its like there is so much excitement for some people and than some of us just don't seem to fit as well. I kind of just lurk everywhere unless I have a freak out moment and need advice I hope that you know that you are not alone though and if you need anything feel free to pm me. I don't have a lot of friends so I am always looking for someone to talk to!
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Thanks AlexKatieAiden Mommy for my amazing Siggy!
 
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 10,854
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Aw Angela I am sorry you are feeling this way. I can see what you mean, just know that you are always welcome here.
We've just got to get some of our post a holics here pregnant and then we'll be over in PAL keeping you company and making that board more active.
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 7,091
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Oklahoma City
Posts: 5,660
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Angela- you belong here! 
I feel exactly the same way you do. I think every board tends to have small "cliques" and as much as people don't want or intend for it to happen, it does. I feel like I am drifting and don't really have a home anymore like I did with my son's DDC. I lurk a lot but sometimes I just don't feel up to being cheery when I'm having struggles myself. But I can tell you I enjoy reading your posts and others who are pregnant as it really is the light at the end of the tunnel for the rest of us. Plus, these boards aren't just for pregnancy- we also share other vents and frustrations of every day life!
Please know you have a home here and always will!
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formally sarah_the_sane_1
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: scotland uk
Posts: 15,407
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angela
you belong here with us hunny! yes sometimes it can be hard for some of us to see about pregnancy but my god its fantastic when we know all is going well with you, it gives us hope and happiness!
please dont worry about the other boards or take it personally, some boards are just that way!
chin up hun and smile!
xxxxx
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Friends are the family you choose yourself and I love my JM sisters!
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: St. John's Newfoundland
Posts: 5,748
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Awe Angie!! I know how you feel. I feel distant from my DDC. But i love the PAL. Cause Dee and Sabina are there. We want you there sweetie!!
I will never over look you. and theres a bond in PAL cause we know most of them there...Just come and barge in...Bigs HUGS!!!!
We are always here for you. I try not to post to much here, cause i was a girl that lost a child as well. But i will post in the topics.
No Worries, thats what you have to say!!!!
We are all your girls!!! You have a place with us!!!
HUGS!~!
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Super Mommy
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 526
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I know exactly how you feel. When I got my BFP, I didn't know if I should join a DDC or if I should stay here. Then we moved and I was offline for like 3-4 weeks. That made it even harder, b/c people had m/c while I was gone. I felt like an outcast b/c I couldn't be here for them. Please don't feel excluded. You belong here and at PAL. They definitely don't post as much over there. But like Bobbie said...some of us are just TTCAL at heart. We will always belong here.
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Mom of 2 beautiful girls!
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Michigan
Posts: 8,906
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Thank you everyone. This is the only board I've ever felt at home at. I you all.
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Thank you Helen for my beautiful siggy!
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: California
Posts: 7,567
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I am so sorry you feel uncomfortable in PAL, we all love you and welcome you with open arms!! we are a quieter board, but no post gets ignored. we would love you to be more active over there.
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Illinois ( originally From New Jersey:)
Posts: 13,040
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Quote:
I am so sorry you feel uncomfortable in PAL, we all love you and welcome you with open arms!! we are a quieter board, but no post gets ignored. we would love you to be more active over there.
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I have to agree with Heather....I am sorry you feel that way about PAL.....most of the girls are from TTCAL.... 
you really have not posted much there at all, give it a chance....it is just as comfy and friendly as TTCAL.....
no cliques,no drama....just baby talk ! LOL
um as far as the amount of posts, there are only so many girls in there right now.....but we do try to keep it moving as best as we can.
I hope you and the other ladies never feel like you dont fit in there...I feel terrible about that...and am really shocke to see that some ladies feel that way also.....I thought it was a great group we had going there, with TONS of support for each other during our fears & freak outs. 
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,058
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Aww Ange l know exactly how you feel,when l was in a DDC l felt the same
as you, but since l have been here l feel so much better thats because these
ladies are the best  so don't feel out here because we love hearing about
your sweet baby and know that you are doing fine, so just stay put here
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Midland,tx
Posts: 6,456
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ty bobbie for putting that.
angiela u belong here and i hope u know that. we love haveing all u girls here u all give us love and hope.
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Allways Remembering our Angels
Angelina Marie 08-02-99, William Dewayne 02-08-01, Thomas Ray 07-30-02 and BabyBean 02-22-08 and BabyBean 03/02/2012
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Dont fit in anywhere anymore
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