i just got a text from mark. his best mate took a massive heart attack today and is hooked up to loads of machines and morphine!
mark doesnt make mates easily because he trusts no one but this one is like family to him. i am close to him too. hes the only 1 i agreed to meet because i knew how much he meant to mark and now this! he is supposed to be coming up here in a couple of weeks

im trying to get mark to go down to him because if the worst happened he would never forgive himself but he wont go. he says he cant go and miss my birthday but if it doesnt get better he will have to go on monday.
if this happens i wont see him for almost 3 weeks which is going to be heartbreaking for me and the kids but i couldnt live with myself if anything did happen!
im sat here in tears, partly because of how i feel and partly because this will break mark when he is already depressed!
the guy is so sweet. he was fantastic with sadie and me and was so funny. he knew how scared i was of his opinion of me so deliberatly sat teasing me saying he didnt like anythin about me. sod!
anyway, if mark doesnt go he is going to need all my attention this weekend and if he does then im going to be very busy with the kids.
please girls, pray he has a speedy recovery, he is only in his 40s

xxx