[HavensMomma]

A friend of mine has a 4 year old little girl, never had a m/c and is not trying to get pregnant right now. We were talking about our cycles and she was saying how hers were long like 38days, and i told her she should see a DR just to talk to him about it because its not very normal. She said "Yeah, well i don't want a baby right now so I'll just wait." Ok, whatever thats your choice, then she adds "I just don't think im gonna have another baby anyways." I asked her why (because i know at some point she wants more) "Just because i know that something tragic is suppose to happen to me" it just makes me sad she would say something like that to me it's kind of insensitive when she knows i've already had 2 losses and she has no reason to think she's not going to have another healthy pregnancy. I'm just kind of hurt by that. Sure everyone worries somethings gonna happen when they do get pregnant but after you have a loss its just magnified so much. I feel like no one around me understands it still hurts to think about the babies i've lost even though its been 3 years since the first and 7 months since the second. Sorry its long i just needed to vent, i hope you don't think i'm out of line for being hurt by this.

[tracalyn]

I'm sorry she responded that way, people just don't think A LOT of the time.

[azura24]

hope you feel better

[Brittanie]

I had a friend who got pregnant shortly after I got pregnant with Erin. She was PANICKED about miscarrying, and most of the time it was unwarranted. She got so upset over the smallest little things, and came to me about it because I "understood the worry." It was really hard, since I was having such a hard time being positive about my OWN pregnancy, and I had a reason to be worried, and she didn't (it was her first pregnancy). I finally told her during one of the complaining sessions that she needed to shut up. I said "Honey, I promise you I'm a million times more worried than you are, because I HAVE a reason to worry. You're making this much harder for me than it needs to be. If you can't be positive about pregnancy around me, then I can't talk to you anymore."

It let up after that. I'm not sure if it was what I said, or she just got over herself, but you are definitely not the only one who feels that way. I'm sorry she said that to you.

[KDD]

I had a friend say to me yesterday that "only a mother would know how tragic that is" (in reference to a mutual friend's stillbirth). She didn't know that I had a m/c so I can't blame her, but I still wanted to slap her! Unfortunately until you've been there, you don't realize the hurt.

I'm sorry she upset you.