[..Jessica..]

Dwayne no longer wants me to come off the pill.

I'm considering some serious action here, and need to be talked out of it.

I feel THIS big right now.

Makes me feel like he DOESN'T want me to be the mother of his child.

[madmum_sarah]

omg sweety im so sorry.
has he given you a reason or is he just getting cold feet?

x

[Pitridge]

I'm sorry
Has he giving you a reason why?

[Brittanie]

I would tell him that you feel that way. And honestly, go off the pill and let protection be up to him. I've said it before, he's being selfish. Why should he get to make such a one-sided decision? Tell him that if he really doesn't want a child right now, then the protection can be up to him.



I'm sorry that he's making you feel this way honey.

[Eleysia]

OMG Jess big Im so sorry. I dont think thats what it is, i just think HE is the problem not you girl. I dont mean that in a bad way... i just mean that he prolly isnt ready to be the father of your child KWIM? Im sure it has nothing to do with you hunny. If you need anything... and i really mean anything please let me know. Im here for you girly

[mom2kaisnkam]

I am sorry. Have you asked why?

When I first had my miscarriage, my husband was determined I would get on BC right away. He told someone else that he felt helpless having watch me cry and he could not do anything to make me feel better. He did not want to see me go through it again. But after hearing what the Dr. has said and the info I have found online about miscarriages, he is feeling better and says it is all up to me.

Maybe your husband is just nervous.... I would calmly ask.

[MountainMomma]

I agree with some of the others, if I were you I would make him be responsible for birth control. I think he is being completely selfish, and I would sit him down and tell him exactly how you feel and how much he is hurting you.

[britneyt]

I'm so sorry - don't let him make you feel that way hun... men can be so selfish sometimes. He's probably unaware of how he is making you feel.
I would let the protection be up to him also. That is very selfish. When I wanted to go off of BC because I was so fed up with the side effects, but we weren't ready to start TTC, hubby fully supported me and he started becoming the one that had to be careful. I think that this should be a 2 way decision instead of so one sided.
Have you guys talked about this more in detail, yet?

[Wee3monkeys]

I'm sorry, hun!!!!!! !!!!!

I strongly second what Brittanie said! And I'm sure it doesn't have anything to do w/ you mothering his children, hun! So get rid of that thought, PERIOD!!! I don't understand the way men think, and I second that he's probably scared, but I too want to hear his reasoning.

Hang in there, you guys will get it sorted out! Just remember though, that just because you got married doesn't mean that you now have to give up what you want in life because he doesn't agree. Marriage is a partnership, and he needs to be understanding of your desires and needs too. I think that you have been so patient and understanding with him, now it's his turn. KWIM?

[~*Nessy*~]

I am sorrry to hear this.

When we found out about our baby was gone, Hubby said the same thing. He didnt want to do this anymore because what if we lost another one, and how hard it would be on me. And the kids already knew about the baby too. It was all him.

[..Jessica..]

Thanks ladies.

I haven't asked him why, but I'm pretty sure I know why.

He wants us in a better place for a baby. Financially, our own place, etc. And I can't be mad at him for that.

I remember back when I told him about my 2nd last pack of pills, telling him it would soon be on him for protection, he gave me this look ---> and said "ME??!?!" so I know he's terrified about that.

I don't want to lie to my husband and say 'yes, I'm off the pills' when I'm not. Possibly get pregnant and then feel like crap, because I've practically trapped him. I couldn't live with myself if I did that.

I want things for myself before I bring a baby into the world too. I want my debts gone, and some weight too.

So.....

I've decided to fill a prescription for my pills, and work on things for me.

[Bakin8th]

I hope you both can come to a place of mutual understanding with ttcing soon.

Good luck!

[Eleysia]

I think youre absolutly making the correct decision. It will happen in due time

[tracalyn]

I hope everything works out for you in the end hon!

[Melanie0507]

Jessica

It sounds like a tough decision, but I definitely think you guys need to talk about the decision together!

I hope you figure it out quickly!

[KDD]

I'm glad that you have made decision that you are comfortable with. I would still suggest that you guys have a conversation about this though.