Forum: Trying to Conceive after Loss
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July 14th, 2008, 05:26 PM
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Super Mommy
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Varnville, SC
Posts: 894
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Well my sister in law and her baby are coming home tomorrow. I am not sure how I will react to finally seeing them. So my friends, please keep me in your prayers.
The story....
My SIL is 18 and not married. She wanted a baby and went out to find some poor boy to get her knocked up. She was the kind of expectant mother who did what she wanted, when she wanted. Well it caught up with her about 2.5 weeks ago. She developed toxemia. She was hospitalized immediately. Her blood pressure kept rising although the baby was never under any stress. Well they did a c-section on the 1 month anniversary of my miscarriage. However the baby was born 7 weeks early.He weighed only 5lbs. But he is doing amazing. He is coming home tomorrow at 11 days old.
She asked my husband and I to be the baby's God parents. We did say yes because we feel like the baby is going to need us when she gets bored with him. I had a real hard time dealing with her when I miscarried. She constantly complained about her pain, her discomfort and her baby kicking her too much. Everytime I heard those things I wished my baby was still here. I got angry with her and had to really pray for God to help me deal with her. Also my MIL made the comment to me that is was for the best that I miscarried my baby, since she was sure I was going to end up helping to raise her daughter's baby.
SIL called today to say he wants to see his Aunt and Uncle and cousins tomorrow when he gets home. I have gotten better since we have been able to start TTC. So I think I will be okay as long as she does not complain about one little thing. KWIM. I am pretty sure I will handle being around the baby okay, I am just afraid I may kill his mom.
sorry this is so long, but thanks for letting me vent.
__________________
Nette MacNeir
Proud Wife to Kevin~November 29, 2003(met October 24, 1998)
Proud Mommy of Kaisee Amber~March 3, 1998
Proud Mommy of Kameron Wesley~February 28, 2001
Proud Mommy of Kaiden Austin ~ August 3, 2009 (born 9 wks 3 day premature)
Proud Mommy to Our Angel in Heaven~June 3, 2008
Proud Mommy to Our Angel in Heaven ~March 2009 ~ Kaiden's Twin
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July 14th, 2008, 05:46 PM
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Generally Crispy
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Arizona
Posts: 5,738
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I think those are completely understandable things given the situation. I hope the visit goes well and that SIL is tolerable.
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July 14th, 2008, 06:30 PM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: McGehee, Arkansas
Posts: 2,684
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First off, you don't have to apologize for anything. That's what everyone is here for. We are all here for each other for support and encouragement and to listen when there is no one else to confide in. I think i would be feeling the same way if I were in your situation and I hope that everything goes well with your visit. We are all here anytime you need to vent and you will be in my thoughts and prayers. Let us know how the visit goes.
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July 14th, 2008, 09:31 PM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 11,084
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I definitely agree that you don't have to apologize, we're all here for support, advice...LOVE, etc!
I hope things go easy for you with your SIL and her son. I'm glad you and your hubby are there for her!
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July 14th, 2008, 10:19 PM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Washington
Posts: 6,164
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I hope things go smoothly when you go to visit, and your SIL doent say anything stupid!
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July 14th, 2008, 10:19 PM
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Platinum Supermommy
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Washington
Posts: 6,164
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I hope things go smoothly when you go to visit, and your SIL doent say anything stupid!
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July 14th, 2008, 11:39 PM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 3,071
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first of all, i can't believe an adult woman would tell you that it's a good thing you had a m/c so you could take care of someone else's baby- someone who isn't ready or mature enough to even have one. you are a better person than i am, i probably would have nothing to do w/ my mil if she had said that to me. good luck, you sound like a mature person and are capable of handling stupidity in others 
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{Linda}
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July 15th, 2008, 02:13 AM
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formally sarah_the_sane_1
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: scotland uk
Posts: 15,407
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il be thinking of you hun.
it is defo not a good situation to be in but from what you say, that baby is very much going to need you.
love and hugs to you
xx
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Friends are the family you choose yourself and I love my JM sisters! 
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July 15th, 2008, 03:04 AM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: May 2008
Location: Red Lion, PA
Posts: 2,110
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I hope the visit goes well today and SIL doesn't do anything stupid.  I'll be thinking of you today, if you need to vent after she leaves....we'll be here for that too.
Good luck today!
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July 15th, 2008, 07:55 AM
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Super Mommy
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Varnville, SC
Posts: 894
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Thank you all so much. My DH wants me to wait until he gets home before we see them. He shuts her and his mom up pretty quick when they start up.
__________________
Nette MacNeir
Proud Wife to Kevin~November 29, 2003(met October 24, 1998)
Proud Mommy of Kaisee Amber~March 3, 1998
Proud Mommy of Kameron Wesley~February 28, 2001
Proud Mommy of Kaiden Austin ~ August 3, 2009 (born 9 wks 3 day premature)
Proud Mommy to Our Angel in Heaven~June 3, 2008
Proud Mommy to Our Angel in Heaven ~March 2009 ~ Kaiden's Twin
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July 15th, 2008, 09:34 PM
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Mega Super Mommy
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: B.C. Canada
Posts: 3,734
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Ughh I am so sorry you even in that situation. Wow you MIL needs a good reality check sadly.
I hope everything goes well and those women remember to mind thier tounge's and maner's around you 
__________________
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
~IRENE~ MOM TO 8 KIDDOES! DS 18, DD 16, DD 14, DD 8, DS 6, DD 4, DS 3 and DS 1
Ttcing #9 After TWO 2nd trimester loss's and FIVE 1st trimester loss's. Missing our 8 ANGEL'S
IUI W/CLOMID/TRIGGER FEB 12/13 09!
Kyle (absent) Chelsea, Miki, Hanna, Johna, Sari, Jessiah and Isaiah.
     
THE LORD GIVES AND TAKES AWAY MY HEART WILL CHOOSE TO SAY BLESSED BE HIS WONDERFUL NAME!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Our 8 Greatly missed Angels
12W, 6W, 6W, 9W 1 twin, 5W
17W twins (sex unkown) and "Elijah"
17W "Angel"
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