[bcowley]

Trying to write this is the first time I've allowed myself to cry. I'm sorry if this long I just need to vent. I lost my baby today. I've been bleeding for about two weeks now. I went to my doctor's office a couple of times I even went to the er a week ago today. Basically everytime I went they told me the same thing apparently I had what they called a small hematoma. They always checked the baby thru ultrasound and he was doing fine, strong hb and all. They said these things usually heal themselves just to take it easy that I would probably continue to see some blood but that my baby was fine. I had my appointment today for a screening where they check bloodwork and baby thru us and there was nothing there. Nothing no sac, nothing. Wow, I totally was not expecting that. I'm just so shocked, hurt, angry, frustrated.

What makes all this even worse is the struggle I've had to go thru just to get pregnant. We struggle with infertility. This is just so heartbreaking. This has to by far be the worst day of my life. I'm sorry for my pity party I just needed to vent.

[..Jessica..]

Oh hun, I'm so sorry!!!!

I wish this never happened to anyone!!!!

[Brittanie]

I just want to say I'm sorry again. Feel free to make your way to the Pregnancy Loss forum if you need to (here). It's always hard to hear this happen to more women. I'm sorry that your baby isn't with you any more.


And if you want to add your little angel to the Loss List in PL, just add your information (your/SOs names, loss date, due date, angel's name/nickname) to the sticky there and I'll get you added.

[Augie]

I'm so sorry to have to welcome you here, yet glad you found your way to us. JM has been very supportive and helpful to me with my losses.

I know there is nothing in particular I can say to take away the pain you are feeling. I can say that it will get easier with time. We are all here for you. Feel free to PM any time. I live on here!

[kellyanne]

Welcome to our group and don't feel bad at all about venting....that's what this place is for. Though all of us have different loss experiences, we all have experienced the "shock, hurt, anger, and frustration". I'm so sorry for your loss.

[amy2008]

Hi - I am soooo sorry for your loss. It is shocking and painful to lose a baby, but when you go in for an ultrasound and find out suddenly, for me, that was just worse. I am sorry you are going through this, but we are all here for you to vent, question and cry. The great thing about this place is that you are among women who understand. We don't just feel badly for you, we KNOW. And I think that helps.

Again, I am so sorry you are joining us. You are in my t & p.

[Pound]

welcome, and i'm so sorry for your loss. it must've been such a shock to suddenly see that there was nothing there.
this board really helped me after my m/c in march, and the ladies here are really supportive.

[madmum_sarah]

firstly i am so sorry for your loss
secondly, you do not need to apologise to us! we have all been there, some more than once! we know how it feels to lose a baby and i have to say you have found a great board to join for support.
i had my first m/c in feb and have had 2 more since.
im so sorry that it all seems to have happened suddenly. to go from having a heartbeat to nothing, not even a sac must be so heart wrencthing for you.
please stick around here, you will get some great support and advice from these amazing ladies.
sending you lots of baby for when you try again. lets hope fertility doesnt become a big issue this time
xx

[bcowley]

Thanks ladies for making me feel welcomed. It was a very long day and night (no sleep) but today is a new day and I will start the recovery and healing process and hope that things only get better from here. I know that here I will find the support I need. I hope to get to know you all thanks again.

[jenn27]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know I can't say anything to make things any easier but You have come to a wonderful place with women that understand everything you are going through. I can't imagine the heartbreak to hear your baby hb and see him on ultrasound and then to have him taken. You are in my thoughts and prayers and I hope that you will stick around because here you will get all the support and encouragement that you need.

[Eleysia]

First off, im so sorry for your loss. I know how horrible that is to go through. As we all do. Im glad that youre taking it day by day, thats really all you can do at this point. it really does suck. Youre absolutly right, today is a new day, and you will begin to heal, but please dont feel defeated if you do have to take a day or a week again at some point to grieve. It almost seems like with every step forward there are a few steps backwards. You can feel absoultly stable one day, then next thing you know youre not sleeping, or eating, or even just crying your eyes out. this takes time, and i hope we can all be here to help you through it.

If you need anything im here, im not activly TTC but i just cant bring myself to leave. These women mean so much to me.

[mom 2 haley & tyler]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a similar m/c in August of last year. I started bleeding and they told me I had a subchronic hematoma. We saw the baby and the hb. They said everything would be fine. I went back 1 week later and the baby was gone. I was 7w3d. I hope you can find some healing here as I did. I wish you the best of luck when ttc again.

[~*Nessy*~]

I'm very sorry that you have had to experience a loss. I know how hard it is to think that everything is okay and have someone tell you that it is not.

[HippyMomOf4]

i'm so sorry for your loss! These women here are all so great, they helped me through my back to back losses, i don't know what i would have done without them.