[MusicalJulia]

I thought this might be a good board to post my question to, so I hope you all don't mind.

How did you know when you were ready to TTC again after your loss?

I recently had a miscarriage.. I was told by my DR that I had to wait at least 1 cycle to try again. This was my 1st pregnancy, so no kids yet... all my life I wanted to be a momma. We waited 5 years after we married to even TTC our peanut we lost- needless to say, we're devestated.

My DH wants to start trying again after the first cycle- as much as I want to be a momma, it's SO SACRY to even imagine being pregnant again and tackling it all over. I'm so scared of having another loss!

Does that fear ever lessen? How in the world do you know when you're ready to TTC again? How did you all decide? Did you just "know"?

I'd like sooooo bad to be pregnant again, to hold a baby.. but I'm just scared, I guess..

(btw- hi, everyone! I suppose I should have introduced myself. I'm Julia (26),married to Matt (30).. we live in New York)..

[.x~KAT~x.]

Im so sorry for your loss Julia After both my losses ive wanted to TTc again straight away, But i am still scared! Its totally normal to feel scared I think that in another month or so you will begin to feel ready again. I guess if you want something so bad (as i do and im sure you do) then you just have to take the risk again x

[Frangipani]

Hi Julia, welcome!!!

I didn't feel like I was ready for a while, but on the other hand, all I wanted was to be pg again. We started really trying about 2-3 months later. No luck so far though and it's been a year now.

I don't know if that fear will ever lessen. I have a feeling that if we ever get pg again, I'll be scared the whole 9 months.

[KDD]

Welcome Julia, I am sorry about your loss.

Right after my m/c I never thought that I would ever want to go through that again. The pain and the anguish were devastating. But within about a week, I realized that my life would be sad if I never tried again. We waited for our first cycle and then we started to try again. We're on our 4th cycle and I know that Mother Nature will give us our BFP when the time is right.

You will know when you are ready. It may take you longer than others, and that's okay. Good luck!

[HippyMomOf4]

First let me say i'm so sorry for you loss! its one of the worst things to go through in life i think.

I really don't think the scaredness of experiencing another loss every goes away, at least it doesn't for me. I'm so scared that if i get pregnant again i will loose the baby again. I just try and stay positive about it but its really hard. I'm scared because i had two in a row and they were both unexplained, nothing is wrong with DH or myself. Just know that you've come to the right place everyone here is so supportive and caring. I don't know what i would do without these ladies.

I'm Denise(23)DH is Chris(25) i'm a SAHM to Isis(3) Athena(2) and 3 angel babies.

[MusicalJulia]

Thanks so much for the responses, ladies
It's nice to find a "place" where people understand, kwim? I hope you don't mind if I hang around? When the m/c first happened, I didn't think I'd be ready for a loooong time. It's only been 6 days, but each day gets a little better for me. I don't think the fear will ever go away for me, but I want a child so bad.. so I know I'll just have to "bite the bullet" and go for it when I'm ready to. I think it'll be sooner than I probably think. So, even if I'm not very actively "trying" quite yet... can I join in?

[HavensMomma]

((HUGS)) Julia, again im so sorry for your loss, hun. Everyone is different in how long they want to wait. Just take it one day at a time and when YOU feel ready then go for it. Welcome, we are all here for you if you need to vent.

[MusicalJulia]

Aw, hey Lisa! Nice to see a familar face in here

[IAMommy]

Julie. I am soo sorry for your loss.

Our stories are a little similar. My DH (travis) & I waited to TTC also, and lost our 1st pregnancy. We lost our twins at 20wks in April of this year. I just knew right away that I wanted to TTC again as soon as possible. I am also scared to death. But for me, the hope of having a baby outwieghs the fear.

I think that when you are ready you will know. And when you are ready, I hope you seen a BFP right away. I also hope you stay and chat with us!! The ladies on this board are fantastic!

[madmum_sarah]

julia
im so sorry for you loss.
the girls here are fantastic and i would be honoured if you stayed as im sure they would be!
i already have children but having suffered 3 losses in 6 months i still know i want to be a mum again (probably more now than i did when we started ttc)
its very scarey and unfortunately i dont think that fear gets any less. it certainly hasnt for me!
what has helped me through it all is being able to come here and talk to ladies that know exactly how i feel but wont hesititate in giving me a kick up the rear if im being over sensitive (got to love them)
please do stick around. im sure you will fit right in
xx

[Danielley08]

I'm always sad to welcome a new member here, but you definately picked the right board to join!!

I've experience 2 lossed in the last 5 months...my most recent being 2 weeks ago at 11w5d...misacrriages are so hard to go through...but having had a chromosome screening with this last pregnancy and knowing what sort of life my poor baby girl would have had helps me understand why God does the things he does sometimes...

I'm ready to TTC already but DH and I have talked things over and with our military careers where they are right now, its not the time to get pregnant...

Just have faith...when you are ready you will know...and when He is ready...He will make you that happiest mommy ever!!

and welcome to the family!!

[Erin41781]

Julia, I am sorry for your loss I too experienced a m/c in the beginning of July. It is heartbreaking I know. We are currently trying already though. I just really think it depends on you and when you are ready. I don't think you will ever stop worrying from the moment of conceiving I think it is just a mothers job to worry!