[madmum_sarah]

darren james arrived this afternoon weighing 7lb 12oz. 4 days late and she ended up having a forceps delivery but finally he arrived and apparently looks the double of his proud big sister!
i am sooo pleased for her, really i am but omg i cant stop crying!
she has asked me when im going to see her (i promised i would asap after the birth) but with so much going on i get to wait a couple more weeks (til im on my way back from manc) but it wont stop it hurting. we were due close together and much as i want to celebrate with her, it only goes to remind me that my due date is fast approaching and not only am i not pregnant but im not even sure where i stand with my relationship or life!
im sorry girls but im having a couple of VERY bad weeks and now this. i havent really been coming online much because everywhere i look there is new bfps or people complaining about being sick and i would give anything for that right now! i just needed somewhere to cry. she knows im going to be upset but i cant let her know how much this is effecting me.
please tell me im not going crazy. i should be jumping with joy for her but i feel so selfish
xx
welcome to the world darren james xxx
xx

[~Laurie~]

OMG! My best friend had her son today! She had a 9lb 10.5oz boy at 9:28 am, so think I feel your pain. Her husband called me to give me the news and I rushed the call because I was getting emotional, then I spent the next 10 minutes or so (felt like an hour) having what I think was a panic attack. I know what you mean when you say that you're so happy for her but so upset by it at the same time. I don't have access to the private forum so I don't know everything that's going on, but if you want someone to commiserate, feel free to PM me.

[amy2008]

Hey Sarah - I know exactly how you feel. My BFF was due 2 weeks after I was. I miscarried at 11 weeks and she went on to deliver a beautiful baby girl just 1 day after my EDD. While I was/am thrilled to pieces, it broke my heart. I knew my baby was also a girl due to some genetic testing we had done. I couldn't see that sweet baby without crying and imaging what my baby would have looked like. It was a knife through my heart each time she would tell me what the baby was doing, each milestone. But her little girl will be 2 in October and it has gotten easier. I think I will always feel pain, but I haven't broken down after seeing her for a couple months. I know you are nothing but thrilled for your friend, but it is perfectly normal/natural to be completely devastated for yourself.

Congratulations on the no smoking! I am sure that is not helping you cope, but hang in there! You are most definitely not alone in this - please let me know if I can help.

XOXO

Awww Sarah, you are going through a rough patch aren't you. I hope the sun shines through the clouds soon. You are such a sweetie and you deserve to be happy!

As the other ladies have said, it's tough when friends have babies. I had two friends that gave birth to beautiful baby boys on my EDD. Every time I see those babies, I think that should be me holding a baby, talking about bf'ing and whining about not sleeping. Somedays I'm ok with it, and sometimes it stings so bad I have to run to the bathroom and cry.

I wish I could give you a big hug. Your friend will understand that it's tough for you if she's your BFF.

[mom2njia]

I know exactly how you feel my step sister is about to deliver her SECOND healthy baby in a year (both were close to due dates I had with 2 dif preg). Its okay to cry! Thats what this board is about!

[IAMommy]

Sarah - I just wanted to give you I sorry you are going through this right now (new baby and relationship problems)

Please take the advise that so many people have given me - be honest with your freind. Go to her, hold her baby, and cry if you need to. Its OK, and since she is your BFF, she will understand.

And congrads on not smoking. you are over the first Hurdle - almost 2 weeks YEAH!!!!!!!!!

[madmum_sarah]

thanks girls.
yep, almost 2 weeks of not smoking! mark comes back late tomorrow/early monday so then the challenge really starts but while he has been away for the week, i have banned smoking in the house, only in the kitchen if the weather is really bad now!

today i kept myself busy by moving my bedroom round. im really pleased as i have created more space so now have my old rowing machine and stepper set up and am using them before bed and when i get up every day (as long as my pain isnt too severe as i dont want to cause even more problems )

i spoke to my friend today a little just to say im sorry for not being able to get down right away but i will see them all in just over 3 weeks. she started crying on the phone saying how much she needs me but is scared of making me feel bad when i go down. she is as upset and scared as i am bless her!
she really is my BFF. we were at school together and been friends ever since (17yrs) so i know it will take more than this for us to fall out. i just dont want to make her feel bad for me when we should be happy for her.
still, i have 3 weeks to get my brave face on!
xx

[Mum2three]

Sarah i really hope that things start looking better for you. your a great person, and deserve to have a bfp right here right now. I know the feeling that your having. My best friend and I were pregnant the same time, and were due 3 days apart, and i ended up losing William. she went to full term with her pregnancy. and out of respect for me they called, but didnt ask me to come to the hospital, knowing that their daughter was here and mine wasnt. I waited till i felt comfortable enough to see her baby. and i did. and it was the best feeling in the world. take your time, people have to understand that your a hurting momma and need some time to heal.

congrats!!

[Alison81]

(((((HUGS))))) It is great that your BFF is so understanding. You are definitely going through a hard time right now. Keep telling yourself that this too, shall pass. It's the only thing that gets me through sometimes, and eventually it WILL get better. There was a point I couldn't be happy for anyone announcing their BFP or talking about pregnancy, but I finally got past that point, and you will too. It's always especially hard around a due date. If you need anything, you can PM me.

[..Jessica..]

I'm so sorry to all the ladies who have gone through this. I haven't (yet) in my life, and I can't even begin to imagine the pain you all are in.

I don't think you're being selfish at all Sarah. Your friend will understand your pain and why you are acting differently. I hope she gives you a huge hug when she sees you.

[tracalyn]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. She is truly a BFF that she understand what you are going through and doesn't want to upset you. Friends like her are golden.