[MusicalJulia]

I'm an early ovulator.. usually around CD 11. My miscarriage didn't seem to mess that up at all, because the cycle following the m/c I O'd on CD 11... as per usual (wasn't expecting that, I was expecting things might be delayed or messed up a bit - alas, it wasn't).

I find myself getting anxious each day I get closer to ovulation I look at my chart and it's almost a... hard to describe.. my heart races a little- it's almost a nervous feeling.

It's almost like a fear, I guess..
I want so bad to be pregnant again, and I'm 99% sure I'm ready for it.. so why am I nervous? And why am I nervous as I approach ovulation? Because this time could be IT? UGH.. I think this time-frame (VS the two week wait) will be much harder for me- I'm all backwards! I should be anxious during the two week wait! I should be scared then! Not now.

I'm not even sure what my point was to this rambling post I just needed to get that out. I was hoping it would calm my nerves. <looks at chart> ... no, no.... it didn't work too well!

[Eleysia]

Julia I think its totally normal hunny. The fact that you didnt say youre 100% sure youre ready also is good. Its sooooo ok to not be absolutly sold on the idea. You had a loss, and youre always going to have some tiny ammount of apprehension as the time approaches that might give you the oppurtunity to be prego again. I really hope that this is your healthy cycle hunny

[madmum_sarah]

julia.
what you are feeling is totally normal hunny.
i am always nervous waiting to O. i get the feelings of "oh i hope we dtd enough and at the right time, what if i dont O but then i also get the, oh no what if we have caught it, i could lose it again... etc etc. the list of fears is twisted and endless!
i worry during the tww because i lose my babies so early but most scarey for me is also waiting to O because i O very early too.
as for rambling... thats what we are here for hun, we have all been where you are and some of us still are
xx

[MusicalJulia]

Thanks girls, so much! I thought I was going

I'm so glad I have you all to ramble to! I can talk to my husband... but he he just doesn't "get it" quite like a woman does ... you know? It's nice to know my feelings aren't abnormal, either.

[Wee3monkeys]

I remember feeling that way too, Julia. There's this big build up to O'ing and catching that eggie; you're timing bd and temping to watch for O. And then afterwards there's like this let down, all you can do is wait now; the work part of the whole thing is over. I don't know about anybody else, but I felt what you're describing too.

[going4it]

I feel that way exactly!! I want to be pregnant, than we dtd and I worry if I will become pregnant, and than am I ready to be pregnant, do I really want to be pregnant (of course I do, but I'm 41, it's scarey) etc etc etc.............

[IAMommy]

Julia - It's completly understandable to feel that way. TTC again can be scary, and it's OK to be nervous. I always get that anxious feeling too, I think it's because we have experienced what it feel like to have all that hope taken away, and its hard to fully open up to that hope again.

[mom2njia]

I totally understand how you feel! I might have a BFP today (could be an evap) and I felt like throwing up! I get so nervous thinking there is a chance...

[Christine-MA]

Hey girl! I completely understand (as I'm sure everyone who has been in your situation does). And I know how bad you want a BFP so I imagine it's nerve wracking because you know this is the time when you'll either BD and have a chance, or wait another cycle. Only you know if you are truly ready, but if you want my opinion I think you are

[LifeToTheMax]

Ughh...I understand the nerves. TTC definitely brings on a case of nervousness, what-ifs, and anxiety. I hope that this IS it for you and that you don't have to go through it again for another month (although, of course, there will be an entirely different set of nervousness if it is!)!!