I've been TTC for a little over 2yrs now. And, I haven't been so nervous in my 2ww as I am now. And I'm only 1-2 dpo. AF is due on October 16/17. On the 16th it will be 6 months since I delivered my son. I really want to be able to have another baby, but I wonder if I'll feel bad celebrating a new baby/pregnancy knowing my son is gone, forever. And it's also pregnancy and infant loss awareness day. I don't know. I guess I just have almost nobody in real life that understands. I "accidentally" avoid sex during my fertile time August, so as not to have an April baby. And then if I am pregnant when April comes by, I'm scared it won't be easier on me, but ten times harder. I just don't know what to do or what to feel about this. I normally post in TTC (and in here on occasion) but I don't think there are many girls in there that would really really get it.

[KDD]

I'm so sorry you feel like this. I don't have any words of wisdom, but want to give you a hug.

[kristajoyce]

It is so hard not to feel guilty about feeling happy after you lose a baby and that is completly normal. My due date for my last pregnancy is on Monday. I am coincidently going in for an u/s for this pregnancy the same day and I am having a hard time with that because I am so excited to see the baby, but I am still so upset and sad about losing our angel baby. I know that I will be an emotional wreck the whole day, but I also know that it is ok and I should just let myself feel both sides of the emotional scale without feeling guilty (at least that is what I am telling myself today). Fortunately my dh is taking the day off work so that we can spend the day together as a family.

I hope that you can get some peace. Please continue to tell us how you are feeling, because many of us feel the same way and talking about it will help you sort out your emotions. It takes time. The pain will never go away, but your love for another baby will grow in a new way.

I'm so sorry about losing your little boy. I had an early loss at just over 11 weeks and am now 32+2 weeks pregnant. It took us 18 long months to get pregnant and to this day, I still have moments of guilt. I still have days where I cry for our angel baby, Morgan.

I'm so thankful to God and to our baby Morgan. If it weren't for Morgan, we wouldn't be having this baby girl so at times, that gives me peace. We have no answers to why we lost Morgan but have just had to take things a day at a time. The pain and hurt never goes away but it does get easier.

We plan on naming this baby Gabriella Morgan as a remembrance to our angel and our thankfulness.

You will get your bfp and will experience all kinds of emotions, just know that they are normal and you can always come to just mommies to talk with us.