what age should you stop having children

madmum_sarah · #1 October 10th, 2008, 11:52 AM

what do you think? i know its a matter of opinion and every one has a different one but would be nice to get an idea of what people think
xx

HippyMomOf4 · #2 October 10th, 2008, 12:22 PM

I want to be done when i'm 25 which is 2 years so hopefully i can squeez two out in the time frame lol. But i think that by 35 people should be done have children, only because of all the risk that come with having a baby when you are AMA.

Mommy0305 · #3 October 10th, 2008, 12:41 PM

I know someone who had a baby when she was 40, and he is 100% healthy.

madmum_sarah · #4 October 10th, 2008, 01:38 PM

i know someone who had her 7th baby at 46. (8 months ago!) he actually is a healthy little boy but personally i wanted to stop at 35 and was really hoping to get another one in by then (although i did say that if i became a grandparent i may think again!) lol

Alison81 · #5 October 10th, 2008, 02:03 PM

I think it's a personal decision. Although, I'd like to stop at 36, before if I have 1-2 before then, just because I know kids in school are cruel, and I think of the, "is that your mom or your grandma?" comments. Plus, there's so many more risks.

Enchanted Mumma · #6 October 10th, 2008, 03:24 PM

It's a personal choice of sure. I would like to be done by 30 which is 3 years away...I only want one more baby so I hope it doesn't take that long!!

MountainMomma · #7 October 10th, 2008, 05:18 PM

It's a very personal decision I think. Me personally...I used to say 35, but now I realize that it's not in my hands at all. I no longer believe in birth control, (beyond abstinence) so I guess that means as long as my body is able to make children (until menopause) there will always be that possibility. I truly believe that EVERYTHING happens for a reason, even if we don't know what that reason is. God will take care of things for us, and while some times I joke that he has me confused with someone else, I know he won't give me any more than I can handle.

Brittanie · #8 October 10th, 2008, 06:04 PM

I personally would like to be done by 35. But if you want to try older than that, go for it. I think only the woman in question can make that kind of decision for her.

My reasons for wanting to be done by 35 is because I want to be young enough to still be active when my youngest graduates from high school and such.

LifeToTheMax · #9 October 10th, 2008, 07:44 PM

I put 45 because I really think that it depends so much on every individual family. Personally, I want to be done by 25-27, but that's partly because DF is so much older and because he already has an older child. And because I only want 1 or 2...hopefully I can have a baby in the next 2-4 years...sigh.

Bakin8th · #10 October 10th, 2008, 08:44 PM

Ughh I have to deal with question soooo Often!

I Voted other and here is why:

As a women who is 38 and ttcing here is what I feel.

As long as my Husband and I continue to be Physically healthy and never had Pg or Birth complication. Have had no prevoiuse pg loss's issues that have had genitics or any links for cause of loss realted to my or dh age.

I have never had a preterm contraction in my life and never had a baby born before EDD unless induced Via a stripping from DR to sneak baby out a weekish early. I have never had a c/s.

We figure as long as God has put the desire in our heart to continue adding to our family and he has clearly been faithful in realizing our dreams we shall continue to trust him.

Of course we always base ttcing the next baby on the health and birth outcome of the prevoise pg and as long as I continue to remian in excallent health pg wise there is no medical reason to stop says My dr

I have been very blessed I know ladies who have just 2 or 3 babies and their bodies have gave out in differnt aspects. My sister had a prolapsed bladder after just her 4th and needed surgery from a birth

I know a gal who whole uteras prolapsed after her first dureing birth...she was young. So age in much less of a facter then how each pg affects the body.

I am not worried about being *TO* old when the younger kids grow up. My mom,dad,Gramma (kids great gram)and MIL are old and very very fit and active with their grandkids lol

mary30 · #11 October 10th, 2008, 09:38 PM

I do not think there is a certain age. I know there is alot of people that it takes along time to conceive. If you are able and healthy enough to take on a baby then I say go for it., But for me I wanted to be done at 30 (I am 30 now) ,but with just having a miscarriage in September( and I will be 31 in January) I will give it a little longer. I still want to have at least another baby and so does DH. So I guess for me 35 would be tops for me. I already have a 12.8 and 2 year old.

madmum_sarah · #12 October 11th, 2008, 12:45 AM

thanks ladies.
i am 31 and really would like 2 more children. 2 with the man i want to spend the rest of my life with and who i know no matter what happens will always be there for our children. (i would settle for 1 though)
i already have 5 children (15,13,11,9 and 3) so am very active. on top of my own children i look after other peoples, i ran a childrens group for 4 years until recently.
i have epilepsy but it is mostly under control and actually i have NEVER had a problem with it during pregnancy or birth!
my other half has just found out his 16yr old step daughter is pregnant. he is only 33!! he cant think right now what he wants to do about having another child. he has been diagnosed with heart problems recently which changes things a little also. saying that he is great at the whole "not too active" things with the kids like talking, helping with homework, playing games etc and he doesnt sleep well during the night so would be able to do the night time feeds etc where as im more into the active side, play fighting, playing football, walking etc so between us we do work out pretty level.
we have said i dont want to have any more after 35 if i can help it (if i can find a way to stop it without surgery) and he doesnt want to be a dad to a toddler at the age of 40 so that really works out too.
guess i was just wondering what others opinions were and what would stop you trying.
xxx

KDD · #13 October 11th, 2008, 03:14 PM

I voted 40 'cause I would like to be done TTC by then. However, my grandmother was 41 when she had my uncle (over 50 years ago) and she had no problems. Overall, I think it is up to the individual.

I'm 35 right now and yes, it may have been easier to start my family 10 years ago, but we wanted to wait until we were financially prepared and I didn't want to give up on my career (or slow it down) when I was just getting it started. Plus, we love to travel and we plan to travel with our baby too. I don't know if I was mature enough before to look after myself and a baby while in a foreign country trying to catch our next flight.

Depending on when we get our BFP I'll be at least 36 when the baby is born, which means that I'll be in my 50s when s/he graduates high school. That's still young enough to do lots. Plus I'll be that much closer to retirement and can enjoy my grandkids and not have to work.

Christine-MA · #14 October 12th, 2008, 07:57 PM

I voted 45 only because I know women who have waited (for whatever reasons) until late 30s to start a family. So if they have 1 at 38 and wait a few years, I'm not against having a second in the early 40s.

Personally though, I wish I had started earlier, but that's just not the way it worked out. I won't have a child before 30 which bothers me sometimes (I was actually due on my 30th bday with my first). But I'd still like to have a few close in age. So I hope to be done by 35.

missy123 · #15 October 13th, 2008, 04:55 AM

If I had to answer this question 1 year ago, I would have said age 35 only because I had my boys really young! Life is overall a constant change. Now I am 39, with 3 boys (youngest 13) and am going to try to have another baby. I look back to the way I thought about life 20, 10, even 5 years ago and it is all different.

..Jessica.. · #16 October 13th, 2008, 11:23 AM

I voted other, because I believe whenever a woman decides to stop TTC and have a baby is completely up to her. Whether she is 25 or 45.

I would prefer to have all my children by the time I'm 30. So, I've got 9 years to have 3 children. If I go past 30, hey, whatever!

Whatever makes YOU happy!

dee68 · #17 October 14th, 2008, 11:29 AM

Quote:

I voted other, because I believe whenever a woman decides to stop TTC and have a baby is completely up to her. Whether she is 25 or 45.

I would prefer to have all my children by the time I'm 30. So, I've got 9 years to have 3 children. If I go past 30, hey, whatever!

Whatever makes YOU happy! [/b]

ITA With you Jess....
as a new mom.....just turned 40 on the 6th.....
my plan WAS to find the perfect man, get married have babies by 28...well guess what? Life throws lots of curve balls at you,and things don't always work out...through no fault of your own....

I met the perfect man in my 30's,moved to Illinois to be with him 2 yrs ago....lost my first baby at 36.....
and waited before TTC again.....am I finished?....probably, not because of AGE, but it was a tough pregnancy ....but if I do get pregnant again, it is meant to be.

ftnjn · #18 October 14th, 2008, 01:26 PM

It's each person's choice as to when to stop.

For me I once thought no woman should have a child after 35 but that was before I had my first son. I was 29 with him and 30 with DS#2 and now I just turned 33 and no where close to giving up until I have my third one.
My X husband's Wife had their son at 39 and he's very healthy.