Should I even try again???

jameyellis · #1 December 17th, 2008, 03:02 AM

Hi everyone, I am new here and posted before when I thought I was "normally" pregnant. Here's my story.......I have a 13 year old daughter with my ex husband and was on norplant since 1995 (just had it taken out....way expired) Married a wonderful man 2 years ago and have not been able to get pregnant until...I had a positive pregnancy test on 11/29. I was so excited. Had HCG drawn every few days and levels were going up but not normally. I had brown and sometimes red spotting just about everyday. Three transvaginal ultrasounds showed nothing....lots of pain (thought it was gas) and ended up in ER twice. The second time (12/14) is when they found out I had an ectopic in my right tube. Went in for surgery and Dr. said he had to remove my right tube because it was already starting to rupture and the "baby" was about the size of his thumb. I am so sad this happened but know there was nothing anyone could do about it. My question is, should I even try again?? I am so scared for that to happen again. They say your chances are higher after having an ectopic to have another one. UGH!!! Do you know anyone with a similar story that eventually had a normal pregnancy?? I guess I just needed to get this off my chest. I'll add one more thing for anyone searching for ectopic advice.........I knew something was wrong, had cramping, mostly on one side, lots of spotting (mostly brown)...Dr's tell me they wouldn't be able to see anything with ultrasound until HCG levels rose to 1500, they were right!!! The 2nd trip to ER they were 1741 and they saw the ectopic clearly (the 1st trip to ER was two days earlier and HCG was 785, they saw nothing)...What I'm trying to say is if you feel something is not right, be persistent!!!! I had to deal with alot of nurses and Dr's who treated me like I was crazy, turns out I wasn't....Thanks for reading, know this was long.

katiegirl · #2 December 17th, 2008, 03:07 AM

I am sorry for you loss. You just need to give it more time. You are probably still too raw from the loss to even fathum TTC. I know it took me over a month before I would even consider TTC after my miscarriage.
There are ladies on this board that have experienced ectopic pregnancies. I am sure one of them will be able to answer you questions.

..Jessica.. · #3 December 17th, 2008, 07:33 AM

Welcome to the board.

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss!!! How are you doing, emotionally?

You can try again, having an ectopic pregnancy isn't the end of trying for another baby. Yes you will feel like you don't want to, and you're scared, but those feelings are so normal and natural to us women.

There are several ladies on here who have had ectopics, and I hope they answer the questions for you.

klt · #4 December 17th, 2008, 07:46 AM

I'm so sorry for your loss. This was so recent. I hope you're doing OK. I know that having an ectopic pregnancy does not prevent a woman from having another baby. I'm sure you'll get the answers that you are looking for soon. Please take care of yourself. And, Welcome.
Kelty

Pitridge · #5 December 17th, 2008, 08:50 AM

I'm so sorry about your loss. The only advice that I have about TTC again is that you need to do it when it feels right to you emotionally and physically. I know for me, we new we wanted to start right away but we waited two cyles before TTC. Good Luck and Welcome.

KDD · #6 December 17th, 2008, 06:13 PM

I'm so sorry. I don't have any personal experience with an ectopic, but I have friends that went on to have healthy pregnancies after. Good luck to you!

heathernoell6 · #7 December 17th, 2008, 06:18 PM

Welcome to this board. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I personally don't have any experience with ectopics either

, however I do also know a couple who went on to have 3 healthy children after an ectopic. Good luck, and this is a wonderful place to find the support that you need. Take care.

jameyellis · #8 December 18th, 2008, 07:45 AM

Wow thank you for all the positive thoughts!! I am feeling much better now....I know there was nothing I could have done about it. I'm glad I posted, you all are so nice. I am going to try again very soon!!!!

Pitridge · #9 December 18th, 2008, 08:35 AM

I'm glad to hear that you will be trying soon. I think the most important thing is tha tyou are ready physically and emotionally, and I hope you stick around.

.kristen. · #10 December 18th, 2008, 09:41 AM

I'm so sorry about your lost. I'm glad you are trying again. I hope everything happens for you the way you want it to be! We are here for you! I will thinking and praying for you!

jameyellis · #11 January 3rd, 2009, 08:13 PM

Hi again everyone..........OK, here I go again. I had the surgery for my ectopic on 12/15..Two days later I "think" I had my period?? Had heavy bleeding and cramps for 4 days..like normal. Didn't take my dr's advice about waiting 6 weeks to have sex..Waited 6 days!! (I was feeling great, back to normal). Any way....I have been having little pains now on my left side, just like it all started on the right....Could I possibly be pregnant this soon again???? I'm obviously scared about this happening again, but badly want another child. So confused.....dr's act like they don't care....UGH..Has anyone gotten pregnant that fast or know someone who did?? PLEASE HELP!!!!