Hmmmmm Updated in post #13

MountainMomma · #1 March 29th, 2009, 10:38 AM

I should not do this to myself. I know I should not do this to myself. I've had two days of spotting and then today...nothing. My cervix is firm again and so high I can barely reach it. I *think* it's closed, but again....it's so high I can't be sure. My nipples are KILLING me and I was so nauseous yesterday that I honestly got sick while cooking dinner. Soooo, I went lurking around the FF charting gallery. This chart didn't report a positive test until 19 dpo!

Notice the similarities between the high temps and the low temps later in the cycle. Maybe I still have a chance after all.

UPDATE ADDED TO POST #13

KDD · #2 March 29th, 2009, 10:46 AM

I hope you're right! My first BFP was about 3 days after AF was due. I wasn't charting then though.

L-SBB · #3 March 29th, 2009, 10:51 AM

Your temps are still above coverline and AF is now late (how many days, 2 or 3?) maybe the spotting was just late implantation bleeding. Have you taken another hpt yet? i'm keeping my fingers crossed for you!!!

MountainMomma · #4 March 29th, 2009, 11:01 AM

I am going to test again in the morning if AF isn't here. I'm not reallhy sure when to consider myself late. I range between 27-32 day cycles, so it's hard to tell.

L-SBB · #5 March 29th, 2009, 11:04 AM

yeah i have the same problem with varying cycles...you kinda work with average cycle length but perhaps this is just a long-ish cycle for you and the implantation was a little later. It's a good sign AF hasn't shown at least....I also had spotting the day after i got the faint BFP at DPO9, which also happened to be the day AF was most likely due, and dr office thought it was probably just IB.

I can't wait for you to test tomorrow!!

..Penelope.. · #6 March 29th, 2009, 11:22 AM

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you, Stephanie! I can't wait for you to test tomorrow!

Kary♥RN · #7 March 29th, 2009, 12:42 PM

I am still holding out for that BFP, STEPHANIE!!!

Danielley08 · #8 March 29th, 2009, 12:54 PM

Have you tried testing with afternoon urine? I know my BFP always looked WAY darker in the evening than with FMU...when was the last test you took?

Sorry for the 50 questions...I had to go to FL this weekend so I was cut-off from JM

MountainMomma · #9 March 29th, 2009, 01:48 PM

I tested with afternoon urine on 8, 11 and just now 14 dpo. All might have had the faintest of faint lines, but since I am the queen of evaps, and they aren't getting any darker they are either evaps, or all in my head. (I think TTC finally pushed me over the edge.)

I tested at 10 dpo with FMU BFN. I am going to test again in the morning with FMU but I don't expect anything different. I guess I am just getting the flu and grasping at straws.

I know I am probably driving you all crazy. I'm just so confused right now and.......
If we had gotten pregnant the first cycle we were trying, we would have had a 2006 baby. Now reality is setting in and the best I can hope for (it seems) is a 2010 baby. I just feel very broken. Every test I look at with only one line makes me feel stupid and like a complete failure. It should be the simplest of things. Have sex....get pregnant....have a baby. That's the way nature intended it. I've done it successfully twice in the past. now suddenly my body can't do it right.I can't seem to get pregnant, and once I do...I can't stay that way.

I'm creeping up on yet another EDD and honestly...with 5 babies lost...and then my dad too....I feel like I spend half of every year mourning another anniversary. The other half of the year I am congratulating someone else in my family or a friend or acquaintance on their pregnancy or birth of their baby. I can't help but wonder if it's EVER going to be my turn.

Kary♥RN · #10 March 29th, 2009, 02:00 PM

OH Stephaine I am so sorry you are feeling this way. I am so sorry that you have to go through this roller coaster ride of emotion. I wish I could say something to make you feel better. I know kinda how you feel. Not to the extent of your losses. But the sting of a loss. I am here for you along with the other ladies.. Please don't ever feel stupid or like a faliure. We all want that BFP and yes we all POAS every chance we get in the hopes that one, will be the one that tells us we are pregs. We all have had the disapointment. If we hadn;t we wouldnt be on this board. This board more then the others. We have pain. Not only have we had that happiness, than the hurt and disapointment... Of losing what we once thought was going to be our babies.. and for the most cases it is more than one loss. One person should not have to endure the loss of one let alone more.

to you!

..Jessica.. · #11 March 29th, 2009, 04:18 PM

I tested at 11DPO in the evening and it was negative, 18DPO in the evening it was positive. I hope you get a blaring within the next few days, Steph!!!

tobynscarlett · #12 March 29th, 2009, 11:05 PM

I didn't get a + until 18 dpo with my 3rd pregnancy!!! Maybe you will get lucky!!!

MountainMomma · #13 March 30th, 2009, 04:31 AM

No need to test today. AF showed in the middle of the night. At least I can stop wondering now. I'll start Clomid again on Wednesday. Hopefully it doesn't take long, because I get HORRID side effects from the Clomid.

Sue46 · #14 March 30th, 2009, 05:29 AM

Sorry Steph!

Cmommy · #15 March 30th, 2009, 05:55 AM

So sorry!!

~Lynda~ · #16 March 30th, 2009, 06:13 AM

i'm so sorry hun, but like you said, at least you know now. the not knowing is the worst!!! HUGS and luck for next cycle!!!

klt · #17 March 30th, 2009, 06:19 AM

I'm so sorry you've had to go through all of this...I'm really hoping that this cycle is yours. Hopefully the clomid will help and the side effects will be mild. Sticky dust and BFP prayers heading your way!