[taralyn]

Help!!

This is our first month actively TTC after our loss and although we're just trying to let it "just happen", I have obsessive compulsions so of course I've been doing my research. If I just strictly go by dates and stuff, I should O later this week. I've been checking CM too but I'm really not sure what I'm looking for. Our plan was to just BD every day for like a week and a half and hope for the best, but I've heard that every day might not be the best idea, and every other day is better? I'm just worried that if we do it every other day we'll somehow miss it. Does anyone have any advice? I'm just getting frustrated, with our loss we had barely started NTNP and it just happened...I hate being so obessive about it but I just can't help it!

[J_n_JsMommy]

Hi With CM you are looking for egg white consistency....*tmi* could be slippery when you wipe...that is the stuff that will give sperm the best chance of survival. When the egg white cm is gone, you are done oing.

I've also heard every other day might be better, giving your dh's little soldiers a chance to rebuild in number etc. Plus as long as there is EWCM sperm can live up to 5-7 days (I actually know someone who dtd 7 days before ovulation, she was charting so she knew when she actually o'ed...that was the only time she could have gotten pregnant). With ds1 we dtd every day for a week and got pregnant though so I don't think this theory is accurate for everyone...I would just assume as much as possible lol.

Good luck! So sorry for your loss but hope we hear some good news from you soon!

[PixieQueen]

Unless your DH has a supply problem every day is fine. The day before you O is supposed to give you a good chance, because then the little guys are sitting there waiting for the egg to be released. From personal experience (this pg, actually) they definitely can survive for a few days. I thought we were out this last cycle, because we last DTD 3 days before my chart said I Oed. I was positive we had totally missed it. But, a few of them hung around! And with my history on getting pg, it happened relatively quickly. It only took 3 cycles this time. It took 9 with my DD and 5 with my loss. It's so hard to be patient!

[Trish36]

I think Kathryn pretty much said it all. every other day is better to build up the sperm supply and you won't 'miss' O, because sperm can survive for a few days. Good luck and hope you catch that egg!!!

[KDD]

I know what you mean about being obsessive while TTC. I hate to say it - but it will happen when it happens. Obviously you can improve your chances though. If you're not charting or using OPKs then checking CM is a great indicator. Usually it will start to feel watery a day or two before you get EWCM. That's a good time to start BD'ing. Every day shouldn't be a problem either. Good luck!

[twoboys]

I am sooooo guilty of being obsessed with ttc... im in that club for sure!!!! guess thats why we are all here!!

[~Lynda~]

Hi there, I am so sorry for your loss. It's hard to return to ttc, but i'm glad you've taken the step. TTC = obsessive compulsive -- at least for me it does...

i will warn you, i have had two losses in the past year and your cycles after your loss could be a bit different. like my first cycle post m/c was normal. but my second cycle I O'd a week later than usual. so just be aware that it might be different. I also agree with BDing every other night. that's how I got my bfps! the other ladies covered everything else.

good luck hun and big hugs!!!

[klt]

They've got it all covered, but, I just wanted to wish you good luck!!!!

[Ryleeroo]

We too are "just letting it happen".
Both time we were trying to get pregnant, we did.
I do the date calculater online of my most fertile time from the date of my last period and thats all.So I know what you mean about being confused.