cant seem to support others here

FruitLoopLace · #1 May 20th, 2009, 03:54 PM

I feel bad, I dont knw what to say to others, Other than, I know how you feel,that is it, because i dont know about anything else since i am still going through for the first time myself. grr, I just wanted to say I am sorry, and I am really not unthoughtful, i just dont know what to think or say still.

PixieQueen · #2 May 20th, 2009, 04:25 PM

That's okay! There really aren't words to make anyone feel better, as you well know. I usually just give hugs. We all wish we could give hugs in real life, but cyber hugs work too! Just being here and understanding, and sharing your story is enough!

Boble · #3 May 20th, 2009, 04:52 PM

oh hun.. don't feel like that. just having someone here who knows what we are all going through is more then any words can say. *hugs*

~~~Sara~~~ · #4 May 20th, 2009, 05:17 PM

I know what you mean, especially with my first loss, I didn't know what to say. Even now, nothing I can say really fixes things, but it's nice to know we have each other.

I hope you are hanging in there, it's pretty rough.

missy123 · #5 May 20th, 2009, 05:59 PM

It is ok! Your loss is still so new, and sometimes it is just so painful that you need to take care of you first. As you heal a little emotionally you may be able to reach out to others. In the meantime just lean on us for a while. What you are going through is really hard and no one expects anything from you.

mlyster · #6 May 20th, 2009, 06:20 PM

Don't worry about supporting others right. You need to take care of yourself and take in all the support we have to give you. In time you will come to be more comfortable offering the support you have received. At this point in your loss you need us more than we need you. I am sure you will have plenty of time to give it back

~Angela~ · #7 May 20th, 2009, 06:27 PM

I'm very bad with words as well. Some girls here can type away and say EXACTLY what I am feeling, but I just can't put it into words myself. Just a short comment lets the person know that your thinking of them.

That said, I hope your grief gets a little easier to bare.

farasha · #8 May 20th, 2009, 06:30 PM

I think just knowing that there are other people out there who care and know how you feel, that's all that matters. Don't worry about what you type.

You're in a comfortable place!

tobynscarlett · #9 May 20th, 2009, 09:22 PM

The other ladies are so right, you are having such a difficult time right now- you don't have to be here for anyone, WE are here for you!!! In a few weeks you will begin to come out of the fog that is surrounding you and will be able to better offer support to others. Unfortunately, it is only a matter of time before we get another new lady that is in a similar situation to yours- that is when you will be able to step in and offer your support. Slowly you will get more comfortable, don't be afraid to post whenever you have something to say- even if it is just to let someone know you are thinking about them.

momof6lopez · #10 May 20th, 2009, 09:32 PM

You owe no one anything is this forum. We are all here for support. Sometimes we give it and sometimes we just need it. Its your turn to recieve it. Just by you typing this post, you have supported everyone here, really. Your thinking of us is proof that you are already starting the healing process. Your going in the right direction, big hugs to you.

.:Shortcake:. · #11 May 21st, 2009, 03:46 AM

Huge hugs hun. Don't feel bad none of us really know what to say. We are just here to support each other and are there to listen.

~Lynda~ · #12 May 21st, 2009, 05:57 AM

there isn't alot to say. i think when we come here, we are comforted by knowing that we are with people who have experienced the same thing as we have. it's not so much what you say, just that you're there!!!! it is so devastating when you feel alone. so coming to a place like this takes a bit of the devastation away. HUGS

klt · #13 May 21st, 2009, 07:45 AM

I agree with everyone. It's time to take care of you. Your time will come when you will offer support to others. For now, just let us be there for you. And, know that you're in our thoughts and prayers as you go through this absolutely horrible time. Sending hugs your way.

Trish36 · #14 May 21st, 2009, 08:37 AM

..Jessica.. · #15 May 21st, 2009, 09:44 AM

Don't even apologize!!! We have all been in your shoes, and know exactly the feelings you're having!!

We're here for you no matter what girlie!!!!

Sending big your way!!!

Kary♥RN · #16 May 21st, 2009, 10:06 AM

I agree with what everyone poste!!!!!! Sometimes all we need to hear is I know what you are feeling.. I think outside of JM world So many people have no idea what to say, so they say things we don't want to hear. So buy just giving hugs.. and saying I am here for you and know what you are going though.. Means the world!!