Too soon?

BigGrin · #1 July 9th, 2009, 10:15 AM

As you can see from my siggie I experienced my first pregnancy for almost 10 weeks and my first loss as of last week. The grieving process has been quite overwhelming. But I feel like I need to be pregnant again, as soon as possible. I want that feeling back of hope and excitement, of a life growing within. I ache to look down a my belly with the same giddiness and grin that I had before.

I spoke to my husband last nigth and he said he would support any decision I made. His only requirements were that I was not bleeding anymore and not cramping. My fears are that I am trying too soon and the worst...will it happen again? I need some persepctive from women who've btdt and who better to ask then the ladies here?

Kary♥RN · #2 July 9th, 2009, 10:52 AM

I am so sorry for you loss... What you are feeling is totally normal.. and is the exact feeling I had! I had such a an overwhemling feeling and urge to fill that void.. I still have it. I am starting my 5 cycle... and that feeling has not went away. I still think about were I should be... I should be feeling labor pains right now.. my EDD would be Tues if I didn't loss my first pregnancy... I still put my hand on my belly... and wish, dream... believe that will happen again. HUGS to you... We all know your feelings.. and we are here for you... HUGS

Ryleeroo · #3 July 9th, 2009, 11:41 AM

I lost mine at 20 weeks,( Due date was last month

and was told to wait 2-3 cycles... This was back in February and we still havent gotten pregnant again

Its not for lack of trying though

I despretly have the need/want for a baby too!

I say if your husband is supportive and the doc gives you the go ahead, then why wait? Good Luck Hun!

hearts.0nfire · #4 July 9th, 2009, 04:26 PM

i'm sorry for your loss. I'm in the same place as you not sure if I should be trying right now or I should wait. I hope whichever you choose that you get your ttc journey isn't too long.

.:Shortcake:. · #5 July 9th, 2009, 05:12 PM

Hugs hun. I am so sorry for your loss. I wanted to let you know that there is no greater risk of having another m/c even if you try now. If your body is not ready the pg will not take and you would get AF like normal. HTH.

Del4 · #6 July 9th, 2009, 05:59 PM

I'm sorry for your loss. I think the feeling is totally normal. We weren't TTC when we experienced our loss, so right after we couldn't try because the timing wasn't right - even though I really, really wanted to. I took the time between to learn about my body and used those methods to prevent pregnancy and 8 months later, we decided we couldn't wait any longer and decided to TTC. We conceived in the first month and are expecting our baby boy any day now. I think you have to do what you feel is right for you. Your doctor can give you guidelines, but really only you can decide when you are ready.

and good luck!

Trish36 · #7 July 9th, 2009, 07:09 PM

I am so sorry for your loss!! As long as you are physically and emotionally ready ttc again, there is no reason to wait. Just make sure you aren't bleeding or cramping. I was 12 weeks when I had my m/c and we waited about 1 1/2 weeks before we started trying again. Good luck and HUGS!!!

BigGrin · #8 July 10th, 2009, 08:29 AM

My husband and I discussed this at greater length and he said he is fine with giving it a go-again. Now if I can just stop spotting and feel more in the mood we might get somewhere. I really want this to work, I think I would stand on my head and do the chicken dance if I thought it would help. lol

Part of me is terrified that I will miscarry again, I am familiar with the stats but still the emotional part of me is very gun shy after this loss. I still have a bunch of OPK sticks so I guess I'll start peeing on them starting next week, as I seriously doubt I will ovulate early after a D&E. So...here we go.

~Lynda~ · #9 July 10th, 2009, 09:42 AM

i'm am very very sorry for your loss!!! it's a very very difficult thing to experience... i have had two losses in the last year. i feel the same way you do. my dr. told me to wait one cycle, for uterine lining purposes. i guess after m/c, your lining is thinner. she wanted me to wait a cycle to let it get back to normal. after my first m/c we did wait a cycle and i got pregnant three cycles later again, only to m/c again. the second miscarriage has totally changed my cycles, and not for the good. they are slowly returning closer to what is normal for me. i'm on my 5th cycle post m/c. i hope you are one of the lucky one's and conceives right away with a sticky bean!!! G/L

MrsB1227 · #10 July 10th, 2009, 11:23 AM

I felt and still feel the exact same way you do. My doctor said I should wait two cycles before ttc, but in reality we only really waited one before trying. I am now on my fourth cycle and really ready to be pregnant again.
As long as your doctor says its ok to start trying I don't see why you shouldn't. best of luck to you!

missy123 · #11 July 10th, 2009, 01:12 PM

My midwife said to wait a cycle and we sort of did. I am on the 3rd cycle after the loss. It is up to when you are emotionally ready and I would wait until your doctor gives you the green light physically. When is your follow up visit?

BigGrin · #12 July 10th, 2009, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by missy123

My midwife said to wait a cycle and we sort of did. I am on the 3rd cycle after the loss. It is up to when you are emotionally ready and I would wait until your doctor gives you the green light physically. When is your follow up visit?

I had my follow-up this last Wednesday. I asked about TTC and she said that while she prefer for me to wait until my first period (for dating purposes) there was no physical reason not to try whenever I was ready emotionally. I know different docs give different opinions, usually due to opinion about emotional well-being, but she seemed fairly relaxed about it.

Loving6 · #13 July 10th, 2009, 07:42 PM

I'm sorry for your loss.I had a loss in May and D&C May 12th and still have not had a period.We are still trying.I hope you can conceive soon.

Danielle.W · #14 July 10th, 2009, 08:35 PM

I'm right there with you! I will be trying this cycle. I don't want to wait. I just couldn't. Sit around and not try for the baby I so despritly want.

sorry for you loss. I want to stop bleeding too. In fact, I basically could have written your whole post.

alicenwonderland · #15 July 10th, 2009, 08:39 PM

I'm very sorry for the loss of your baby. I had a recent loss too, though I was not as far along. I have the same need to try again. I just can't imagine not trying. My doc said to go ahead. If you do plan on trying this cycle, keep a close eye on your fertile signs. My fertility returned faster than I ever could have predicted.

BigGrin · #16 July 11th, 2009, 07:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alicenwonderland

I'm very sorry for the loss of your baby. I had a recent loss too, though I was not as far along. I have the same need to try again. I just can't imagine not trying. My doc said to go ahead. If you do plan on trying this cycle, keep a close eye on your fertile signs. My fertility returned faster than I ever could have predicted.

How soon did you ovulate? Have you O'd already? I was thinking of using opk sticks starting next week but now you've got me thinking I should start sooner.

To everyone who has written words of encouragement and condolences, thank you so much. This and the loss board have been an immense comfort to me and a place to shout all my pain and heatbreak. You gals are great.