Beta Levels from my 3rd m/c

farasha · #1 September 8th, 2009, 11:52 AM

Just an update:
My levels were 80 when I went in on Wed of last week to the ER (after a week of bleeding). On Friday, they were 73 - so definitely another miscarriage. I have to go in again this Friday just to make sure they're still decreasing.

Thanks for everyone's thoughts. I know I've been nonchalant about this one, but I am just so numb. I feel like if I let myself feel this one, then I won't be able to function anymore and I'm so tired of being that depressed. I cried myself to sleep on Sunday, but other than that, I've somehow made myself truck on through the days by putting it out of my mind. I've got such a tough semester ahead of me, and I can't afford to break down again. It's just easier to go with the motions of life right now while we try to figure out what's wrong with me.

Obviously, I'll need to put ttc on hold again until I get another AF or two and get some tests run. I'm sure I'll still be around the board. Thanks for your support everyone.

HUGS

mlyster · #2 September 8th, 2009, 12:18 PM

Sucks Kristin... don't know what else to tell you but I understand about not letting yourself feel this one. I think that is my attitude too and if (or when) another one happens for me I will be the same way. Thinking about you and hoping for a HUGE drop for you so you can get back to a normal cycle (whatever that means).

Kary♥RN · #3 September 8th, 2009, 01:18 PM

Kristin HUGS, I know how you feel about being numb. I wish I could make it all better, and fix everything. I hope you get answers. The worst is the not knowing. HUGS

momof6lopez · #4 September 8th, 2009, 02:14 PM

Kristin I can relate to the not letting yourself feel this one. Just keep your head up and keep going forward, I pray that your body heals quickly for you though.

Oreobaby · #5 September 8th, 2009, 03:13 PM

I am so sorry for another loss for you.

Celena · #6 September 8th, 2009, 03:26 PM

I'm sorry Kristen... I don't know what I could say to you that would make you feel any better. I know what you mean about being numb....

wish I knew that last night and maybe you hinted but I didn't hear it well enough. I'm sorry!

Time is the only thing that makes it get easier like you were telling me last night, it does get easier... right now it may seem like a lifetime away, but it's there.... just allow yourself to feel and grieve.

Being numb is a doubled-edged sword sometimes... when it makes it's way to the surface it doesn't care where you are or what you're doing it just comes out. Hope you can grieve and not be totally numb.

When you said about figuring what's wrong with you, that's just the thing it's not always something wrong with us but being women we question if it is our bodies or our anatomy... but it isn't always. I hope there are some way to get some answers for you honey, but don't blame yourself because right now there is no way of knowing if it's anything with you.... ok?