So many stories

mlyster · #1 September 9th, 2009, 08:49 PM

After posting on my blog I have been receiving so many stories and so much information I didn't expect. Women I know who have stuggled with infertility and miscarriage and never talked about it finally came talked about it (to me at least). And then tonight my friend was telling me that when she talked to her mom about my miscarriage her mom finally opened up about a miscarriage she had as well. My friends knew about the miscarriage but didn't really "know" what was going on since she was so little. Anyway my friend told me that she had never heard her mom talk about it before.

Have you found people more willing to tell you there story when they find out yours?

momof6lopez · #2 September 9th, 2009, 08:59 PM

No, not IRL, not yet. Im 38 too, so you would think that someone close would of fessed up by now, right? Or maybe in IRL everyone around me has been spared this horrilbe experience, I hop for the later of......

missy123 · #3 September 9th, 2009, 08:59 PM

I think that is great that people have opened up to you like that. Have you had a lot more support now from people you were afraid to tell before? You have such courage to open your soul like you did.

JessP · #4 September 9th, 2009, 09:01 PM

I have had more people open up about their stories once I opened up about mine. That is so wonderful that you had such a great response to your blog. I bet that helps.

mlyster · #5 September 9th, 2009, 09:08 PM

Lori - I bet you will find out IRL there are people who have gone through it and just not talking about it. It has taken me 7 months for me to get comfortable to tell my story enough people to find people who would tell me theirs.

The stories and comments have helped. What I do hope is that when someone else has this happen people are not afraid to help that person or direct them to me as a source of information and support.

#6 September 9th, 2009, 09:25 PM

Yes, the more people know about my history, the more I hear 'that happened to me' or something along those lines.
I was unfortunate to know about a few friends m/c prior to ttc, but I guess that helped knowing I wasn't alone.

Celena · #7 September 9th, 2009, 09:52 PM

My Aunt (maternal) and my cousin (paternal, sister) and also a friend of mine... but no seeking

.:Shortcake:. · #8 September 10th, 2009, 03:22 AM

I have had people say its happened to them but then they moved on and had alot of children.... sigh*

Oreobaby · #9 September 10th, 2009, 04:43 AM

I have had people talk about it that I didn't even know have MC...people that I don't even necessarily get along with, it's weird, but at the same time nice to know that you are again, not alone...??

Trish36 · #10 September 10th, 2009, 06:09 AM

yes, I haven't told too many people, but it is surprising how many women have been through this. I've heard stories from a neighbour, a co-worker, and family friends, that I'm sure I wouldn't have known about had I not mentioned my m/c. My dh also remembers his mom going through one as well...he was young and all he remembers is his mother freaking out in the bathroom and a lot of blood. I haven't actually told my MIL, so I don't know if she would tell me anything.

Kary♥RN · #11 September 10th, 2009, 12:14 PM

I had to tell people at work... right when I get my BFP... working as a Nurse, on the floor that I do.. I can't be around some pts. I have so many nurses that I work with have losses... None that I work with have had more than two. While they are open and tell me thier stories.. All have had went on to have more babies.. I have been open about my second and third loss. The first almost NO BODY knew about since it happened so fast a BFP than bleeding within 36 hours. The second EVERYBODY knew about my D/E, even people that didn't know I was pregnant... Since my name showed up on the OR list with what I was having done, and why. I had people coming up to me telling my thier stories.. It was nice but hard.. since it took weeks for people to stop bringing it up.

..Penelope.. · #12 September 11th, 2009, 08:53 PM

I knew before my loss that two of my sisters had experienced losses. We learned that Autumn was gone on the day that I should have been 12 weeks, so as I thought I was approaching the second trimester, I was beginning to tell more people at work about the baby. After I lost her, I took a week off work, and I was really emotional for a long time after that. I'm not good at hiding how I feel. So between people knowing and people asking if I was ok, if I felt comfortable with that person, I shared my loss. The response was incredible. People were empathetic, understanding, and they opened up with their own experiences. I was shocked by the sheer number of women on my unit at the hospital who had lost their babies.

It was really sad. But the women who had lost their babies and gone on to have their little miracles gave me hope.

KDD · #13 September 11th, 2009, 09:14 PM

I haven't really "come out". When I took time off work while waiting for the m/c I had to tell a few co-workers. A couple of others figured out why I was gone and they did tell me their stories. It's sad how common losses are. It's comforting to know that they all went on to have children. And it's sad that I'm still waiting.

Kudos to you Michelle for having the strength to share your story publicly.