[noworries]

I got my lab results back (amnio and bloodwork) that they took when Eli was born (he was born still at 26 weeks) and it showed that he had Trisomy 13 (a chromosomal defect incompatible with life) and that I had CMV. So, they can't tell me which of these caused the hydrops because they both can be causes. I have to get more bloodwork and a urine analysis done to see if I am still carrying the CMV. We are waiting on the results of the autopsy and then we will meet with the specialist to go over things in more detail and talk about future pregnancies. But, when the specialist called me to tell me the results, she made a comment that this could affect me getting pregnant again, that I may have to wait a while. I know that I need to do whatever is needed to ensure a healthy baby (if that is possible) next time but it makes me sad because I ache to be pregnant again (not that anything is going to take away the pain or replace Eli). Ugh. Just had to get that out there.

[sodagirl]

I'm so sorry about your loss! Hugs and love!
Here are my thoughts about the cmv - Sooo - I get cold sores so I've read about herpes and babies - from what I've read CMV is related to herpes. And I think most of us carry it in one form or another.
Here is the ifo I found about CMV - and it's the same thing they say about herpes generally - You are only at risk for transferring it to a baby if it's the first time you have become infected and even then only 1/3 of the time the baby will get sick. So it's pretty unlikely it's the CMV. And if it was - the chance of you giving it to another baby is really really low.
Here is the wiki page: Cytomegalovirus - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
I'm obviously not a specialist!!!! So talk to them - but maybe this can put your mind at ease (a little) while waiting to talk to them.
You and your body and mind and soul have been though A LOT just now - so let yourself heal too ok! Love hugs and baby dust when you are ready!

[Trish36]

So sorry Carrie!!! I know how hard the wait can be and you have been through so much. HUGS!!!!

[Celena]

I'm so sorry I'm so very sorry honey!!!

I think sodagirl summed it up wonderfully, and the information provided should set you at ease. I understand the fears of loosing again, but your doctor is going to get to the bottom of it and work with you to find out exactly what is going on and also what happened to Eli.

God bless you honey!!! Please KUP!

[Kary♥RN]

HUGS for what you have to go through... When looking up stuff.. Wikipedia is a place were anyone can put stuff.. It is not regulated. Just an FYI.... CMV can cause problems.. and it would best to take care of it prior to getting pregnant again. Your doctor will be able to treat you and get you back on track to have that healthy baby in your arms.

The link below is from the American Pregnancy ***.. and is the Same info from the March of Dimes..

Cytomegalovirus (CMV) Infection : American Pregnancy Association

GOOD LUCK...

I also wanted to say Eli is beautiful, HUGS

[starrsgirl]

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I know it's hard to hear but I would probably wait it out a bit and make sure you get all the answers before you get pregnant again. It may be something really easy to fix that will ensure your next pregnancy is healthy. I'm sorry that you are ready to go but maybe your body needs to catch up just a bit. Hang out here with us! We'll keep you sane.

[sodagirl]

Kary is right - it's always a good idea to check several sources. Wiki is usually quite accurate - since it's designed well and many very well informed people take care of it and correct things - the fact that many different people can post and edit actually tends to make it better. (unlike say a book - where it's one person and their publishers opinion - not that a book can't be great info - but anyone can write a book too!) Take everything with a grain of salt and get lots of info - and talk to your doctor

[noworries]

Thanks ladies. Several people have told me that about the CMV (that it's only if it's the first time you've been infected) but the specialist didn't say anything about that. I am sure I will get more info on it from the specialist when we meet with her. I will also do everything in my power to make sure I don't have it again for future pregnancies (better safe than sorry right?).
And the specialist did tell me that there is only a 1% chance of re-occurrence with the Trisomy 13 so that is very positive.
I know that I need to give by body time to get back to normal and also give myself enough time to grieve Eli before getting pregnant again but that is all in my brain. My heart wants to be pregnant again so badly. But, my husband helps me to keep this in check when needed.

Thanks for that website Kary...it's a good one.

[momof6lopez]

Carrie, Im so sorry for your loss and want to welcome you here. I dont know anything about this CMV, but I would definitely wait until the dr. gives you the green light. I would hate to see something happen prior to your getting this cleared up and have to under go so many more tests with a future pregnancy. I wish I had more to give right now, just know that your so welcome here when your ready.

[JessP]

I am so sorry for your loss. I wish I had more to add but I don't know much about CMV. Take care of yourself and I hope the doctors give you some helpful information soon.

[Mel1979]

I am so sorry for you loss I am sorry I can't help with your questions but I wish you the best of luck in the future.

[rebeccabaltimore and more]

Carrie- I think I may know how you feel. After I lost my son, the preliminary autopsy results showed that he had severely defective kidneys and intestines. The defects matched a genetic disorder called Fanconi Anemia. It's an awful, awful disease. We wouldn't know if he had it for six weeks. We spent weeks thinking we would never have any living children. We couldn't pass a disease like that on to another baby, even though there was a 75% chance our next child would be unaffected. Eventually we received the news that our son died of a diabetic embryopathy. That means my undiagnosed untreated diabetes hurt him. TTC would have to wait until I was well enough to safely get pregnant again. It took A LOT of hard work, but eventually we were cleared to TTC again. With my fertility issues it ended up that I didn't get pregnant until 7 months after we lost Ethan.

At the time, the wait was so painful. But in the end, I'm glad it took 7 months, because looking back I wouldn't have been ready before then (although I thought I was at the time).

i know the days crawl by right now, but they move a little faster every day. Sooner than you know, Eli will be getting a little brother or sister, and he will watch over them. If you ever need to talk to another mom who has been there, please feel free to PM me.

[krystal g]

I can't really add anything that the other ladies haven't already said, but I'm so sorry for your loss.