[BigGrin]

While I have not been dealing with this TTC journey very long I am still feeling pretty blue. I got pregnant with a "honeymoon" baby and was literally over the moon happy. It seemed too good to be true and in the end, I guess it was. I was 9w 6d pregnant when it came crumbling down and I m/c.

Now every month I faithfully BBT and time the sex because our work schedules conflict so much. Then I go through two weeks with my heart in my throat just to feel like crying when the sticks show a single line. Now I am in the 2ww and can't even bring myself to feel excited anymore. I just feel like maybe I was never meant to be a mom...irrational and stupid but that's how I feel.

I bought 25 pregnancy cheeapies online and naively thought I wouldn't use all of them before gettting lucky again. Now I am almost out and feeling so depressed when I check the prices online for them. At the same time I see and hear so many women getting pregnant "on accident" and feel such jealousy. What's worse is when they treat their pregnancies like a tragedy whereas I would swallow earth just to exchange places with them.

[zkat]

It is unfortunate the circumstances in which we meet, but you will find this board to be a very understanding and comforting place to hang out. There is not a single women here that has NOT felt what you are feeling right and we all understand.

I hope your stay here is short, but feel free to vent, ask questions or just lurk. The most important thing to remember right now is this "Whatever you are feeling, it is OK to feel that way"

:dothugs:

Kat.

[Celena]

Awe, ya know there's allot of us who can relate... must be why we're all here hee hee

I admit I get pretty fricken peturbed when people who complain about pregnancy or getting pregnant, that it was on accident.... I've known some who's DH's didn't but they con'd them and wham pg! oh I've heard it all and it all annoys me, we WANT our own baby together!!! We've been trying since last April 2008... here we sit, 19 going on 20 months (cycles) later with 2 confirmed losses, and I've had chemicals too (faint + then get af a couple days later).

So I feel you... the encouragement is, we do have each other! We have a place like this to talk with others in the same situation, understanding and supportive! Deep down I know we will get pregnant again, just cannot loose that faith!!!

[~InHisHands~]

I so understand the hopeless feelings!

I just finished a pg loss Bible study that has helped me a lot, if you wanna check it out... Threads of Hope, Pieces of Joy

[TeresaSuperMama]

(((Hugs))) It is so hard not to get discouraged. I am not very good at coming up with the perfect words (not that there are any) to cheer people up, but just know a lot of us know how you feel. Hang in there.

[BigGrin]

Thanks ladies, your words were very encouraging. I think I came across as a newbie to this section when I've been coming here for a few months. I just have been so busy with work I haven't posted much in the last two months. It does help so much to know there are people here who know how I feel and have btdt.

I try to stay optimistic but it's hard. I feel guilty for even complaining when there are women here who've been trying for years and here I am just months after my loss. But thank you all for not holding that against me, it really read support and encouragement.