[whitewaive]

Sorry, if this is a duplicate post. I already posted this on the pregnancy loss board, but wanted more people to see it. Plus hopefully (but not definately), I will try again!




On January 21st, I was about 10 weeks pregnant, and went for my second prenatal exam, with a new OB/GYN. I showed him my first ultrasound, and he commented on how nice my tiny baby looked. He went to check for the heartbeat. At first listen, he found none, but wasn't concerned. Then he went to check by ultrasound. It was at this point, that he determined that I had a miscarriage. I didn't have any symptoms, so I was in shock. My husband and I have been grieving over the loss. We are unsure if we will try for another child. This would have been our first, and I am at the risky age of 40. Your comments, thoughts and prayers are much appreciated.

[L-SBB]

I've very sorry for your loss...I lost my first pregnancy at just past 9 weeks after seeing a hb, and I know exactly how awful that moment when they can't find the hb is. HUGS

As to your age concern, my m/c happened just after I turned 36...and I went on to have a very healthy baby at 37. If your concern is about the chance of another m/c, we do have a higher risk of that (unavoidable, unfortunately)...if your concern is about the chance of other birth defects, I'd recommend you meet with a genetic counselor...they can provide a risk profile and give you a better sense of potential risk. All of that said, risk calculated by age is not necessarily the risk you'll end up with once pregnant....by age my risk for Downs with my pregnancy was 1-277...but after NT scan + bloodwork, actual risk turned out to be 1-10,000 (best possible).

Don't decide anything on TTC again until you've had a chance to recover and emotionally heal....for a couple of months after my m/c I couldn't even imagine TTC again and risk another m/c. HUGS

[Kary♥RN]

I am so sorry for your loss..... HUGS. Welcome to the board. I know how hard it is to be here.... I have had three losses.... and it is scary I am 34 I will be 35 in May.. I hope you do decide to try and join us.... Thier is also a an Older member board. that I am also a member of.. the may helpease some of you fears...
Trying to Conceive Older Members - JustMommies Message Boards

Good Luck.. It is ok to belong to a few boards... I know I "fit in to" a few.. HUGS

[mafiamom]

i am so very sorry for your loss. i lost my baby at 8+4 and totally relate to the "no fetal heart beat" news. it is horrible.

i am 38 turn 39 next month, so i sympathize with being older as well. we will try again, but i have real fear about how things will turn out now that i have had a loss to deal with.

huge hugs. i am sorry you had to come to us but please know - these are wonderful ladies who will support you 100%.

[Celena]

Hello WhiteWaive

I want to welcome you to TTCAL, but not under the circumstance... I am very sorry about your loss and do hope that you & DH concieve effortlessly sooner than later! (when you're both ready of course) It doesn't go without fears, but hope & pray you never experience another devastating loss.

I'm Celena 33yr, going thru my 3rd loss in 7 months with my DH... we're trying for our first together. (I have had 4 miscarriages, my 1st was 10 years ago. So blissfully ignorant then.)

I do have to say that I've known allot of later 30's, 40's IRL to get pregnant and have healthy successful pregnancies and healthy babies. (friends, clients & even friends parents) Even tho that a different box of worms than pregnancy loss and adds more stress, don't stress and try to be optimistic... you don't know if there is any problem. (easier said than done, I know)

[ma2b2010]

i'm so sorry for your loss... *HUGS* My thoughts and prayers are with you and your husband.

[hubshope]

WhiteWaive, I'm so sorry you're going through this. (((HUGS))) I will keep you in my prayers. When your heart has started to heal a little from this loss you'll be better able to decide if you want to try again.