[sweetgirl51305]

Hi everyone. I've been lurking for a few days now. My dh and I lost our bean Monday. I was 4w 5d. I'm still on the fence about trying again right now. I know we want to try again, but idk when. I'm supposed to ovulate next Monday, but idk how my cycles are going to be after the m/c. I've been reading that you have higher fertility after a m/c. I have a dr. appt on Tuesday to talk about the m/c and confirm it I guess. The nurse told me that the dr will probably tell me to wait 3 months. But, she said she has seen other women get pregnant the month after and have a successful pregnancy. I'm kinda wanting to try again this month, but I'm just scared. I don't want to loose another bean. Idk if I can take it again, I was devestated. But, Idk if time can cure the fear. Anyone get pregnant the cycle after a loss?

[j&jmom]

First of all, I'm sorry you are here, but welcome. I had a mc almost three weeks ago. My ER doc told me to wait at least one month and my OBGYN told me to wait 2-3 months. However, I've heard several stories where women have gotten pg immediately afterwards and everything went okay or is going okay. We were going to wait until at least AF, but my dh kind of forgot a few times. Since you mc so early, your body would probably heal faster and be ready to hold a baby without problems. Everything I've read says the only point in waiting is to be able to date the pregnancy . . . other than that it depends on it you are emotionally ready. Good luck in whatever you choose.

[Natalie_Snow]

I am so sorry for your loss!! {HUGS}

My doctor told me to wait 1 cycle before TTC. He also said that you get pregnant only if your body is ready (therefore, you can try if you want to but your body may not be ready yet). I felt that I wanted to wait 1 month, so I waited 1 full cycle and I am TTCing now. But I read about people getting PG right after the loss. I'd ask your doctor about what he'd recommend (if m/c was complete, he usually recommends to wait one cycle).

and Welcome to the board!

[Kary♥RN]

I am so sorry for your loss..{{HUGS}}.. Welcome to the board.... As for when you should start trying... it is a very personal choice... While if you are healthy.. thier is no medical reason to wait... I have had three m/c.... after each one I was given the ok to start right away... it didn't happen right away... after my first loss, it was 2 months, after that loss it was 7 months, and now after my third I just got my BFP last week... it took 4 months.... Yes I am scared... We all are.. But we want that little one, That little miracle in our arms... so for me the want... out weighs the fear.... We all know what you are going through... so please lean on us to get you through the fear! HUGS!

[hubshope]

Hi Sweetgirl. I'm so sorry you're here, but hopefully we'll be able to offer you comfort and support that you need.
I had a m/c in august '09 and my doctor thinks a chemical this past Dec/early Jan. I don't know about that, but he thought so.

Anyway, my MD has told me since August if I'm ready to try he's fine with that.

My sister had a m/c back in June 2004 and then got a BFP on July 1, 2004 (I only know the exact day b/c it was her birthday). So she didn't wait at all. She conceived and delivered healthy boy/girl twins. Her doctor thinks she had twins b/c she believes women are more fertile right after a m/c and if your body is not ready it just won't get pregnant.

I don't know if that's true or not, but I do think if you're ready to try you certainly won't hurt yourself or the baby if you do conceive.

Good luck in whatever you decide. We are all here for you and know how hard it is to go through a m/c and how scary it is to think of becoming pregnant again.

[jojo1207]

I have m/c 6x, this most recent one is my 7th (all early before 8wks). I also have four living children. I'm so sorry for your loss. It's so hard.

My personal belief is that if your body is ready, and the conditions are good, you can get pregnant soon after a m/c. I m/c our last at 4wks, 4days - very close to you and I'm not waiting. I just stopped bleeding four days ago and DH was willing so we're all ready starting again. We'll see what happens. I hope that because it was an early early m/c and that my HCG was all ready at 2 within 24hrs that my body healed quickly and can hold another pregnancy again this soon. Now to figure out what day I ovulate... last O was late by four days which we though was a miracle we even got pg! Our bodies are a wonder...

Big hugs - sorry you're here, but you're not alone!!!

[mafiamom]

so sorry you for your loss, but glad you found us!

i have heard of many many ladies getting pregnant after mc. actually i am very surprised they told you to wait 3 months with a loss of 4+5. some women dont even know they are pregnant that early! sounds like they are being ultra ultra conservative to me (disclaimer : i am not a doctor LOL but from everything i have read it just seems extreme to me!).

i agree with the other ladies. if your body is ready you will conceive... it will not hurt you to try if your hcg levels are down to zero.

and i totally understand that you are scared. it IS scary after you have suffered a loss.... i had one at 8+4 and i am a nervous wreck thinking about what a nervous wreck i will be when i get preggo again!!! nuts right?!?!?! but the end result it just sooooo worth it, and so - we keep on keeping on!

huge hugs! - kup

[sweetgirl51305]

Thanks guys for the warm welcome! I'm sorry for everyones loss. My dh and I decided that we're not going to wait and go ahead and try again this month. If I get pg then great, if not it wasn't meant to be. I will also do things differently this month. I will resist the urge to poas (other than my fertility monitor). I am not testing until AF is due. Even though idk if it will be the normal 28 days like before the m/c. And once I get my bfp thats the end of testing. No more obsessing and worrying. I know it's easier said than done, and I may not be able to do it. But that's my plan. I don't want to worry the whole time like I did this time. I hope that it'll all work out! At least I know I can get pg and when to dtd. We only dtd 1 time and it was my 1st peak day on my fertility monitor. So now I know what to do! Hopefully I'll get another bfp and have a sticky bean! Thanks guys for all the support!

[shell1981]

Im so sorry for your loss. I know its hard as i had a chemical last month, so this month although i was ttc, i was really frightened about it too. I think you should take one day at a time and do whats feels right for you and dh.

I just wanted to add that my cycle was a little off. I oed a week later than i usually do and it also is making AF later than usual. But i know other women that have oed earlier the next cycle too.

[Celena]

I'm sorry to be welcoming you Lindsay after your loss, this isn't the way we'd all like to come together... but I have to say you've come to the right place for support, compassion, experience and more! These ladies are awesome!

It's good to hear that you're picking up and getting on TTCAL, that is wonderful and sounds like your emotional state must be good overall (altho still very worried, concerned and devastated... but good to start ttc again) if that sounds right? Just hope that you don't go thru the pain and agony part for too long, it's hard to go thru period... and everyone grieves and heals differently, in different length of times. Don't be surprised if there are bad days and good... it's a roller coaster that's for sure! However that's what we're all here for to support one another and I hope that we can be all that you need us to be when you need us.

Vent scream jump around acting like an insane monkey... we'll be here to help you thru it!

[sweetgirl51305]

Thanks guys! Yall are so sweet. I've got my follow up dr. appt tomorrow morning to confirm the m/c I guess. I'm curious to see what he'll say. The secretary only gave me my beta results (a 3), and they didn't say anything else. I would've been 4w 6d on the day of the bloodwork, and I'm pretty sure that that # isn't what it should've been. So, I guess he'll just talk to me about it.

[jojo1207]

Good for you! Cheers to grabbing the bull by the horns. We're right there with ya. If there's any truth to being more fertile after m/c, we're taking our chances. I'm not obsessing either (no charting or anything) but if I can make it to AF without testing, that would be a miracle. Good luck!!

[mafiamom]

i am pretty sure a beta of 3 is considered not pregnant - anyone know this? i was under the assumption anything under 5 was considered basically zero.....

if that is the case - you are good to go!!!

[LisaG825]

Some doctors say 5 or less and some say 2 or less!