[ohnicole]

First of all, this is not the first irritating appointment I have had with my primary care doctor. For example, when we found out about my loss, she said, "Put it in perspective, it's not like it's the saddest thing that ever happened to you."

I had an appointment with her yesterday to discuss my request for a referral to a RE. I made this request because:

1) It is almost 6 months since my loss and my cycle lengths have been 70d, 50d, and 40d, so my cycles have been long and irregular. And even before my loss, my cycles would range from 30d to 42d. So maybe not long but definitely irregular.

2) I had thyroid testing done and some of my results were just on the edge of the normal range.

3) My sister was diagnosed with autoantibodies and her RE recommended I be tested for a whole panel. My doctor will only test me for the specific antibody that my sister tested positive for.

So, first my doctor said, "There is no such thing as irregular cycles. You either get periods or you don't. If you get periods, it doesn't matter how long the cycles are, they are all normal. Plus, if you get your period, you know you are ovulating because you can't get a period without ovulating."

Then she said that my concerns were all for infertility problems. I said I was under the impression that irregular periods could be due to many different health concerns including thyroid, diabetes, PCOS, autoimmune disease, etc, all of which are health issues in their own right. She said no, the only causes are thyroid and malnutrition, and since my thyroid looked normal, there was nothing more anyone could test for.

Then I asked her if my OB disagreed with her and wanted me to see a RE, would she write the referral. And she said "I guess, but you should really take some time on this decision. I know you just had your loss in the fall and now your sister had a stroke, so you are operating in a traumatic framework and probably aren't thinking clearly."

She drives me nuts. Luckily I have an OB appointment tomorrow and he is not crazy.

[Isabelle]

Originally Posted by cricket909

First of all, this is not the first irritating appointment I have had with my primary care doctor. For example, when we found out about my loss, she said, "Put it in perspective, it's not like it's the saddest thing that ever happened to you."

I'm practically spitting fire reading this. How dare she say that. I think I would have punched her and then slapped her and then done it twice again to her. I'd be looking for a new doctor ASAP. What an insensitive horrible woman.

I'm so sorry she said this to you. I'm steaming.

Hugs.
xxx

[dancefever]

I'd definitely be looking for a new doctor as well. That's horrible. And some of the things she said are just flat out disgusting. I would be so fed up with her by now if I were you. She's a doctor - she should be a bit more sensitive to your concerns and needs. UGH. I really can't even believe she would say those things - especially as a woman herself.

I'm glad you have an appointment with your nice OB! Maybe he can recommend a new doctor for you!

[brandimomof2]

OMG. I would go running far far away from her. That is horrible and it sounds like she really has no clue about fertility issues.

[Kary♥RN]

RUN FOR THE DOOR!!! Get away from that insentive B-I-T- C-H!!!!!!! Stupid woman... I want to smack her... I can't believe what she said to you... HUGS I am so sorry you had to be treated that way. See if your OB will write the referal..So you don't even have to go back.... HUGS

[ak_mommie_of_4]

Are you kidding me? Let me guess, she has never been pregnant.... so has no idea or even close to an idea on what it is like to have a loss. I would have beat that woman. Talk about having no bedside mannor. I wouldn't even go back. She sounds like she got her education out of a crackerjack box anyways. Good luck at your OB appointment and hopefully you get some good news.

[mommy x 10]

I wouldn't have gone back after the first comment and I would have let her know that MY BABY DYING does happen to be the saddest thing that has ever happened to me. I don't know how someone could be so insensitive!

[BigGrin]

Fire her. Now. I am seeing red after reading that nonsense!!! I work in the healthfield and can tell you she is completely off her rocker if she thinks her "medical facts" are true. Yes you can have a period without ovulation...why else would there be such a word as annovulatory bleeding? And yes there is a such things as irregular cycles.

Honestly I think my blood pressure just climbed. Ditch her and then write a nasty letter explaining why she is fired. The stupid c*nt.

[lex1078]

I wouldn't have sat through that appt. I would have walked out at that first comment. Please find a new Dr. ASAP! No Dr should talk to a patient like that and this Dr. obviously missed the lesson on female anatomy and menstruation. A Jr. high student knows more than this Dr. I hope your OB helps you more. Please KUP on that appt.

[Celena]

W T H is wrong with her? Seriously? SERIOUSLY!!

Screw that noise, I would call my insurence and complain about her because #1 they can submit a complaint to a board (I had to do this with a FNP when I lived in WA, long story, but she was a stupid ****** too)

Ok after that I would ask for a referral from them because your ins company can put you thru to a dept that will override any "needs referral" limitations and give you a name of a dr in that specific field after explaining your situation.

That is incrediably HEARTLESS and COLD, horrible bedside manner if I do say so too... it's people like that, that need to find a field to work in where they DO NOT have to have direct contact with people ESPECIALLY those who are seeking help. Geesh! I cannot believe that crap.

Nicole I'm so sorry glad that you were able to come here to vent, get advice and support... but to go thru that is just awful. Please do PM me if you need to... and we're all here for you.

[EJsMommy]

OMG!! What terrible "bedside" manners. Very insensitive. Quick find another doctor that has better social skills than this one. That would drive me bonkers - it drives me bonkers when anyone one not just a doctor would say something like that or even hinting towards that direction.
I am so so sorry that your primary care doc is such a-s-s.
I really hope that you find another primary care doc that can care for you they you deserve.
{{{Hugs}}}}

[ohnicole]

Thanks for all the support, ladies. I really just needed to vent a little- my DH is out of town and usually he gets to listen to me rant about my doctor's appointments for hours on end

I know this doctor is a COMPLETE idiot. I only stuck with her after my loss because we're living in this town temporarily, only until DH and I graduate this year, and I figured I would probably not need to see her, especially since now I have an OB. I was so wrong about that, and I've had to see her several times. This visit was just the icing on the cake. I cannot deal with her ever again.

I almost said to her, "Did you even GO to medical school?"

But then I figured a formal complaint would do more good than a cat fight in the office.

Most of what she said is actually hilarious. In the moment, it was shocking, but looking back it is absolutely ludicrous. She should have been a comedian.

The rest was offensive, and she has said several other offensive things to me. She does have kids, and I can only hope her DH has some compassion to teach them. Otherwise I feel very, very sorry for them.

On to the OB tomorrow!

[ak_mommie_of_4]

Alls I can say is WOW. Good luck at OB tomorrow and KUP.

[DukesMommy12]

Get a new GP

[LisaG825]

I am so sorry you had to go through that with your dr. I agree with all the other ladies. I would find a new on ASAP even if you are there temp. I quit going to my primary care dr. b/c of things he said to me when I got hurt at work. I refuse to go back to him.

I wish you the best of luck with your appt. today and I hope you can get some answers there. Let us know what your OB says!

[EJsMommy]

GL with the OB appt and KUP.

[noworries]

I am speechless. I hope your OB appt. goes well and you can get your referral to the RE. Find a new doctor and file a complaint against her.

[EVY&EGYsMommy]

OMG I too am speechless!! DID she go to medical school???? UM yeah you sure can get a period without ovulating!!!! I didn't go to school for 8 years to know that.

WOW.

Good luck at the OB!

Katie

[ohnicole]

Thanks, everyone. The OB appointment went really well. He is definitely not from the same fake medical school that my GP went to I have to pack to head back out of town early in the morning, so I will update more on Friday, most likely.

[dancefever]

Originally Posted by cricket909

]I almost said to her, "Did you even GO to medical school?"

But then I figured a formal complaint would do more good than a cat fight in the office.

I probably would have made that comment! But good thinking!!

Glad your OB appointment went much better!