[Kary♥RN]

Do you ever ask this question?

Do you let yourself have down days? or Do you try to stay "overly postivie"?

[markswife]

Yes, I ask that question every day and it infuriates me to no end that there may not be an explanation. I want there to be an explanation so I can fix it.

As for crying, I do my best to hold it together all day. My gym buddy is seven months pregnant so I have spent many a trip home from the gym bawling hysterically. It feels good to let it out so I don't even try to hold it in. I just do my best to keep the sadness from taking over my life.

The losses are too recent to be positive let alone overly positive. I'd like to have this feeling eventually but I'm not there yet.

[aitch]

I do. I blame myself. I hate it.

I have become overly positive, particularly to those I love and that I don't want to know how badly I'm hurting.

I have good and bad days.

Sometimes I am on a high & being very positive & thankful for DD # 1 and congratulating all my pg friends, then the green eyes monster shows & I am low, down, negative, emotional.
Sometimes I just want to hide away from the world, stay in bed with the curtains drawn but I have a DD to look after & she has needs & wants so I can't be introverted and selfish, so I pick myself up & tell myself that this shall pass too and everything will work out how it is intended to be............

[Isabelle]

My darkest day was the day of my D&C. I cried more that day, sobbed, howled and screamed in emotional pain than all my 41 yrs of living.

Since that day I've chosen to move forward, knowing and staying positive that we'll have another baby.

So to answer the question, yes I stay very positive with just moments of doubt but the doubt is due to my age.

[ohnicole]

This question does get into my head sometimes, and usually it does no good. I came in and out of this post a few times because I kept changing my mind about whether it was a good idea to start thinking about it.

I can't even tell you how many times DH had to listen to me crying about why it happened to us and that it wasn't fair in the month after our loss. But really I just think everything is chance. In some ways that makes it harder, and in some ways easier.

[martilynne]

I think that everyday. We had to have done something to keep deserving all of this terrible stuff to happen to us...

[SkyBaby]

I ask myself that every day as well. DH is at peace and very positive about this and keeps telling me to pray. I prayed for my Angel Baby to be healthy and you know what happened. Will praying really make a difference? God's gonna do what He's gonna do regardless. If/when I get pregnant again, I'll love that baby and hope he/she sticks. I've sunk pretty deep into this doubt/what-if black hole. I've only had one loss and I already feel hopeless.

It's like rubbing salt in the wound every time I see women pregnant who didn't want the baby in the first place. How they whine about all the symptoms. Sometimes I want to slap some sense into them and tell them they don't know how lucky they are.

I debated on posting here as well. I can only keep those what if/doubt feelings suppressed for so long. I do it so DH will get off my back. I have no control over this and that's what's killing me. I can't just "give it to God". DH says "It's possible God is waiting for you to give it to Him before giving us a baby". Just peachy. Is a miscarriage punishment for not having any faith?

**** it I'm starting to cry again. I can only hold it in for so long then it consumes me all over again.

[stephjp]

Generally speaking, I do pretty good considering. I have spurts of sadness/hurt...
3 of my closest friends are preggo and one of them is one week ahead of where I would have been and they just found out today they are having a girl...I am so happy for them but it has also brought hurt cause I would have been finding out next week what we are having...So, it goes both ways for me...I try to just keep my faith and trust in God even though I dont always understand. And I do try to keep all my thoughts as optimistic as I can...I would rather have hope than be down and miserable all day...thats just me though...

[Natalie_Snow]

Bad luck or maybe something is wrong with genetics?
I try to stay positive but it's harder since I've just experienced a second loss. I've probably dome something bad in my previous life. But according to some philosophies, m/c is a good thing (and sometimes it helps me to think this way).