Today is my EDD. (past losses & pg mentioned)

Kary♥RN · #1 May 10th, 2010, 04:10 PM

Today is my EDD from my last loss.... This is the third one I have been through. It feels no different than any of the two.... It still hurts, I should be holding my baby..... But if I was I would not be pregnant with twins..... So I feel torn missing the bab(ies) I lost... but knowing if I had that (those) bab(ies).... I would not be carring two. Some people believe that babies that you have lost, come back to you. I can only pray that my losses, were these two that I carry now.. trying to come to me multiple times before. I know it sounds sappy. I just feel so sad/blessed/confused... how am I supposed to feel?

I thought being this far along it would be easier.... it's not. I think it is worse. I want to remember my baby on his/her EDD... But I feel that I would be being unfair to the babies that I have right now.

Natalie_Snow · #2 May 10th, 2010, 04:42 PM

{HUGS} EDD is hard... i am one of those people who believe that they come back to you.

~LaurenNoel~ · #3 May 10th, 2010, 04:52 PM

Hugs! I have not experienced a due date after a loss, but I can imagine it is awful. You are so blessed having those twins. I have never heard anyone say babies we lose, come back...but it sure is a nice thought.

BeccaM · #4 May 10th, 2010, 04:55 PM

Hugs Kary. I have not passed an EDD but I can only imagine the grief I will feel. I am also one that believe they come back to you. I am not sure who said it to me after my loss, it may have been Tobi but was told that god was not done with my bean just yet so he took it back to fix what was wrong and will give them back to me later.

tobi4 · #5 May 10th, 2010, 05:02 PM

I am also one of the ones who believe they come back to you. Kary, you can do both. You can mourn the loss of the babies you lost, you can also love the babies you are creating. Feeling the loss in no way diminishes the love you feel now, its not a betrayal hon, each of them deserve and have your love. You have every right to feel exactly how you are feeling, please dont feel bad for having the emotions that make you such a special lady. ~~hugs~~

Celena · #6 May 10th, 2010, 05:16 PM

Kary I know you honey.... and I

LOVE

YOU!!!

You're not being unfair to these two beautiful little ones if you mourn the baby *babies* you've lost. They're little ones that you are entitled to grieve... they are your heavenly angels and these two aren't going to hold a grudge to you honey. They love you unconditionally in utero and when they're born as well.

I'm so sorry this day has come and is so hard on you honey, wish I could be there for you and take you out for tea or lunch to just talk. I love you Kary, thinking about you and praying that you know in your heart that you're a wonderful lady, a wonderful mother!

Kary♥RN · #7 May 10th, 2010, 05:23 PM

Thanks ladies.... This EDD has yet been the hardest.

Isabelle · #8 May 10th, 2010, 05:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kary♥RN

Some people believe that babies that you have lost, come back to you.

I agree with you one million percent.
Hugs Kary.

RinkMom · #9 May 10th, 2010, 06:26 PM

Hugs Sweetie,
I have been there and totally know how you are feeling. It is okay to be happy about the beautiful twins you are carrying but you are, in no way, betraying them in grieving for the part of you that you have lost.

mommy x 10 · #10 May 10th, 2010, 06:40 PM

I totally understand what you mean. I've been thinking about this a lot this month. My edd is coming up this month. And I feel so incredibily happy to be pregnant again but I still feel so sad that I'm not getting ready to welcome the baby we lost. Nothing about loosing a child is easy. Hugs!

j&jmom · #11 May 10th, 2010, 08:13 PM

Hugs!! I too believe you can mourn your losses without guilt. I hope that I can be pg again before my EDD. I have someone very close to me with the same EDD and she has had a healthy pregnancy. Everytime I see her I think of what I would look like if it was me, what I would see on my ultrasound, and I know I will think about my baby when I am holding hers. It is so hard. But I do want to believe that my baby is waiting for me and someday I will see her again.

missy123 · #12 May 11th, 2010, 06:36 AM

I am so sorry Kary... (Hugs)

.:Shortcake:. · #13 May 11th, 2010, 07:28 AM

Hugs Kary! Thinking of you on this sad day!

ldovey83 · #14 May 11th, 2010, 10:46 AM

I have gone through both of my EDD and neither of them was easy... HUGE hugs hun.. Hang in there..

martilynne · #15 May 11th, 2010, 01:12 PM

zkat · #16 May 11th, 2010, 02:31 PM

Kary, I am so sorry this one has been so hard on you. I believe your babies are all watching you and are over joyed that there are two beautiful siblings thriving inside you.

Kristin (Farasha) just had a post about this very same thing on her blog - the guilt of being joyous about your current baby on your EDD.

Kat

blessedx7 · #17 May 11th, 2010, 02:40 PM

I am so sorry you even have to have this day. I can relate so much. On my last EDD, my best friend had a baby. She never even knew I was due that day because we never told her about the ectopic. The EDDs are sooo hard, especially the first one.

Many blessings,
Kelly

brandimomof2 · #18 May 11th, 2010, 03:44 PM

I had an EDD in Dec and it was really hard. I still think about my baby a lot. I dont think I will ever stop thinking about him or her and what she would be like today. Today has been a real hard day for me. I dont know why.
I guess because I am still not pg and I wonder if I ever will be again. I miss my baby so much and I do hope the babies come back to you. I know I will see it in heaven though so that does make me feel better. EDD is tough and dont worry about grieving. Your babies you are carring now understand.