Probably joing you guys

angel3y35 · #1 May 26th, 2010, 05:33 AM

I guess I'm joining you. No offense to you wonderful ladies but this isn't where I want to be. I've been having strong cramps that everybody said was normal. Last night and this morning they got worse. The pregnancy had been confirmed at my OBGYN's office because I was on Clomid for the first time this month. I was supposed to go to my military PCM (hubby army) to test so that they could put in the OB referral and it was negative. Stark white negative. I knew when I woke up something wasn't right. I'm going to call my OGBYN in a few and see if I can get a beta done and some pain pills. I know the pain will be horrible. It would be bad enough on it's own but I have endo and I'm 3 months out from a lap. I cried and cried and cried and then I'll stop for five minutes and then I start all over again. I know I wasn't that far a long and it might even be called a chemical not a miscarriage but I only had 3 days with this baby once I found out and it's just not fair!!! We've been trying for 16 cycles. I have PCOS and endo. I had a hydrosalpinx repaired. I'm 28.............

MomtoCTSK · #2 May 26th, 2010, 05:53 AM

Hugs. No matter how long it was it is still a loss. I see you on the endo board and I hope that your pain is manageable and that in time you will have peace.

dreamer10 · #3 May 26th, 2010, 06:06 AM

I am so sorry for your loss. Hang in there. The ladies here are the greatest. They have some of the biggest hearts here on JM and they can help with the healing process...

BuckeyeGal23 · #4 May 26th, 2010, 09:26 AM

Hi Paige...I'm so sorry that you are going through this...I have pcos and endo also, and it killed me to have a m/c because it took so long to get pg in the first place - it is very disheartening. We're here for you!

~LaurenNoel~ · #5 May 26th, 2010, 10:04 AM

I am very sorry for your loss.

Lex&angels · #6 May 26th, 2010, 10:35 AM

I'm very sorry

I had 2 early losses.

Don't call it a chemical if you don't like that word. You were pregnant. I don't call mine chemical pregnancies either.

..Michelle.. · #7 May 26th, 2010, 11:23 AM

Welcome Paige, I am so sorry for your loss. Hoping for gentle days for you ahead.

Michelle T.

hellokitty · #8 May 26th, 2010, 11:24 AM

I'm so sorry for your loss. I also lost a baby early. Like the other ladies said a loss is a loss. I hope you get your next bfp soon...I had a m/c in sept of 07 and was pregnant by nov 6th again. Some say your more fertile after a m/c.

angel3y35 · #9 May 26th, 2010, 02:54 PM

Thanks ladies. I think this might be the only place I visit on JM for a while. I still had a itty bitty bit of hope but the beta showed my level at 9. The doctor said their tests only go down to a level of 30 so Monday morning my level was at least 30. That's a big drop in two days. He said the bleeding should start in the next day or two. Now that I know it's over I'm ready for it to start and getting it over with. He also said since it's so early that we only need to wait a cycle, both for mental reasons and for my lining. Since the m/c can thin it and we'll be using Clomid again which can thin it. The only good news out of the appointment was that he said chances are very good I will get pregnant again soon and it will stick and that my progesterone levels were really high so that shouldn't be a problem in the future. He was really nice reassuring me that it wasn't my fault and couldn't have been prevented. They went ahead and drew my blood to test the RH factor and that nurse asked if I was OK, told me to have faith that thing's happen for a reason and it WOULD work out. The checkout nurse made sure I was OK to. I'm reassured to know that I can get pregnant because after 16 cycles I didn't think I could.

Natalie_Snow · #10 May 26th, 2010, 03:05 PM

{HUGS} I am so sorry for your loss! This is a great board to be on though, the ladies are amazingly supportive!!!

Has your doctor told you how long you'd have to wait before you can TTC again?

I've had two m/c, one at 7w3d and another at 5w. My OBGYN told me to wait till one normal cycle after the m/c... I waited three months but I guess that did not help and i m/c again. After the second m/c I did not wait at all and started TTC the very next cycle. I heard that it's possible that you're more fertile after m/c.

I hope you get a STICKY BFP soon!!!

angel3y35 · #11 May 26th, 2010, 06:03 PM

Thanks ladies. Yeh the doctor said since it happened so early that I would just need to wait one cycle and then I could do the Clomid again.

Celena · #12 May 26th, 2010, 08:45 PM

Paige I'm so sorry

this isn't where I'd want you either!!! I hate seeing ladies join here, it's heart breaking knowing that when we get a new lady here that it means they're going thru a devastating loss.

I'm so very sorry you're going thru this right now

I wish I had more words to help you right now Paige.

Hope that we don't see you here for very long... and a graduate story soon to follow!

angel3y35 · #13 May 27th, 2010, 07:06 AM

Things look a little better this morning. I'm sure there will be a while where tears will come out of nowhere. DH is trying but he's saying all the wrong things. I know he means well though and that's what matters. I really wish the bleeding would go ahead and start though. Anybody know when that'll happen? It's cruel torture that my body is still betraying me by not letting go. I did learn one thing from this. There will be no more testing until AF is a week late.

MommyLove415 · #14 May 27th, 2010, 07:20 AM

I think we were in the same DDC for a while Paige. I'm so sorry to see you here. I had to join this board as well

Sounds like it's been a long road for you but keep your faith. I told my husband the same thing...I have no desire to test early anymore either. I have really benefited from lurking on this board for a few days. I'm thinking of you!

SD Mommy · #15 May 27th, 2010, 08:49 AM

Paige, I'm so sorry for your loss. It's so heartbreaking to go through a m/c. The bleeding/pain might not be so bad since it was an early loss. I'm hoping that it is quick and painless for you.

A couple of things helped me through my first loss. At least you can get pg. I know some ladies hate it when people say this to them but I always found it very comforting, especially if you've been trying for a while. And also my doctor told me that you are more fertile after a loss. So there's always hope.

Take care of yourself.

angel3y35 · #16 May 27th, 2010, 03:37 PM

It is a comfort to me knowing that I can get pregnant. After trying for almost two years I didn't think it would happen. It's also a comfort knowing that it happened my first Clomid cycle and knowing that it wasn't low progesterone that caused it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SD Mommy

Paige, I'm so sorry for your loss. It's so heartbreaking to go through a m/c. The bleeding/pain might not be so bad since it was an early loss. I'm hoping that it is quick and painless for you.

A couple of things helped me through my first loss. At least you can get pg. I know some ladies hate it when people say this to them but I always found it very comforting, especially if you've been trying for a while. And also my doctor told me that you are more fertile after a loss. So there's always hope.

Take care of yourself.

ldovey83 · #17 May 27th, 2010, 04:33 PM

I am sorry for you loss hun... This is a great place to vent and just let it all out cause we can all relate with you.. Hang in there, and feel free to vent all you want.. Let it all out.. It really has helped me.. Hugs!!!

RinkMom · #18 May 28th, 2010, 05:35 AM

Paige,

I am so sorry to see you here. I noticed you weren't posting on the Feb DDC anymore. Nobody should have to go through a loss.

The ladies here are amazing but I hope your visit is short!

HUGS

Karen