[Fallen2Love]

I should preface to say we're not "TTC" persay but we are not exactly preventing either, but assume each month I can get pregnant. So we DTD during O time (based soley on CM seen on my undies). I was sure that perhaps I did concieve. So I'm on CD 35 of my 30-40 day cycle I was sure I'd be a BFP. Considering I've been having reflux like symptoms on and off for about a week, and my sense of smell is extremely sensitive (I work with toddlers, and said "Oh so and so has a poop" before I even looked in their diaper something I rarely do usually I just smell the BM). Well, I was trying to be sneaky and not obvious to DH so I didn't go downstairs and get a cup like I usually do - I just peed right on the test. I didnt pee enough to get a good 5 seconds on the test so it could be flawed, but it was a BFN. my logical side said "wait til Monday, wait til Monday, wait til Monday" at least I'd be on CD 37. Mind you I *never* have gotten a BFP prior to "CD" 50 (I guess at that point it is not longer a true cycle)! I'm so super upset! I had a m/c in march and this is just one more big blow! I so badly want to be pregnant, I want to do something with our vacant bedroom that is completely empty that will one day be the nursery. I'm just drainned by seeing announements everywhere of pregnancy, hearing babies laugh, giggle, cry, going through the drama with finding a bottle for the picky breastfeed baby, changing diapers, etc I want to do it all over again. I know I'm not offically out for the count yet since I O'ed late in my cycle. I know its called the "two week wait" but for me its always been the "three week wait." So I know I tested way too early, and I didn't test by peeing into a cup. I never thought this would be so difficult. My mind is just consumed with baby and pregnancy thoughts. And I found out someone is due the same week I was when I m/c'ed I'm really really bummed out. Not to mention I'm surrounded be pregnant woman and babies (new babies at that) all day long at work!
Worst comes to worst I'll test on Monday or something. I'm just so anxious to find out because I have to have an MRI done for a wrist problem. I can't do it if I am pregnant (clinic policy). I scheduled it out far enough so I know I will be far enough along to get a positive test, but still I'm on pins and needles because I want to know sooner rather than letter (impatient).
I'm so sorry this is all over the place - but if you made it all the way through thank you for reading.

[Celena]

I'm so sorry for the frustration you're going thru right now and the loss that you've had. Sounds like you're going thru a really rough time. You're going to find the ladies here absolutely wonderful!!!

[Jennifer8080]

I hope you get sticky BFP soon!

[Kary♥RN]

HUGS... I hope Monday brings you your BFP!!! KUP

[Love-Bug]

:hugs: hun!! Sorry for your losses!! And keep some faith don't count yourself out just yet! It isn't over until the witch shows!! Good Luck sweetie praying monday brings you your

[Fallen2Love]

Thankfully, I know its not over until the witch shows. The issue more is would the witch just keep a darned calander on her and come to visit on the same CD each month LOL!

Is it always so exhausting TTC after a loss? I mean, TTC is one thing and a BFN always stings, no matter what way you put it. But I am just so heartbroken from the loss it kinda feels like a slam in the face with AF last month, negative test today its like a mockery like my body is saying "HAHAHA - You are not pregnant!" Yeah - I think I stepped off the rocker a tad (if not more). Is it really bad for me to want to really jump into actively TTC I know target has a BBT for $10, and I'm so ready to buy the OPKs just to start charting more for my own peace of mind and track my cycles better then "my best guess."

[brandimomof2]

Sorry about your bfn. Hope you see a bfp soon. We had a loss last June and still ttc. I know its hard.

[KAB]

I'm sorry for your frustration, I got mad at the witch this month also because she was late and teased me about thinking I might be pg but I kept getting BFN. I hope your not out this month, maybe you'll get your BFP Monday!

[Fallen2Love]

So more teasing from the witch.
I had a *drop* literally of blood yesterday evening. I put a pad on "just to be safe" nothing since! Of course I had to pee so bad this morning I couldn't get a cup in time.