New here

TTCin2010 · #1 July 3rd, 2010, 06:35 AM

My name is Karen i'm 27, hubby is 33. We just suffered our first loss (and hopefully only) at 8 wks. I had lap surgery for stage IV Endo in Feb. I had two huge cysts removed along with my left tube (still have left ovary).

My LMP was April 30th, but we didn't get our BFP until I went to the Dr's on June 14th, bc all of my home tests where negative. HCG levels where around 24,900

On the 18th I went for an US to make sure it wasn't an eptoic . Dr said everything was fine so we told everyone!

On the 21st Dr calls and said that when re-reading the report she noted the baby had a low HB (78) she ran my HCG again and it was around 55 thousand. She told me not to worry and to come in for a follow up US.

June 24th- I had a follow up US using a different machine. Dr couldn't find the HB so they sent me to the hospital to have a third US using the same machine as the first time. They found the heart beat but it was still low (83) and the baby had very slight growth. HCG was 76 thousand

Dr said we just had to wait and see.

July 1st I went back for my 4th US, and there was no HB and the baby had not grown.

I had a D&C yesterday July 2nd.

It has been such an emotional roller coaster. I feel so silly for telling everyone, and now having to go back and tell them we lost the baby. I feel like all future pregnancy will be tainted with fear, because of what we have experienced. I feel like my body has failed Sorry if posts seems a little scatted I am still trying to wrap my head around all of this.

BeccaM · #2 July 3rd, 2010, 06:41 AM

I am so sorry for your loss. I completly understand about the fear and so will all the ladies here. You have come to a wonderful board with awesome ladies. We are all here for you.

luvmykids623 · #3 July 3rd, 2010, 07:25 AM

I'm Lori and I'm new here too. These ladies are fabulous and have been so welcoming. I'm so very sorry for your loss. Know that what you're feeling is normal. I felt similar to you after I lost my first. I had told everyone, and it was so hard to have to go back and tell them that I had lost the baby. Please don't feel silly, you were only sharing your excitement. As for future pregnancies, I'm not going to lie, I do view pregnancy differently since my losses, and there is a lot of fear. But, I make an effort to focus on the good things too. I usually look for the milestones, and there is great joy in each of those. I'm so sorry you had to find out what this feels like. This is a great group of ladies, and it's a safe place to share your feelings!

tobi4 · #4 July 3rd, 2010, 07:36 AM

Hi Karen,
Im so sorry you are going through this. Hun, dont feel like your body has failed. Sometimes it just happens, through no fault of yours. Hang in there, you'll get through it, and we will be here to support you, when you need us.
~~hugs~~

Kary♥RN · #5 July 3rd, 2010, 12:43 PM

Karen I am so sorry for your loss... HUGS. I am glad you found us, Welcome to the board. What you are feeling is totally normal. Your story sounds very much like my Second loss.. Our Heartbeat was slow.. but they said.. of we think it just started. Never told me that thier could be a problem. When we went back, no heartbeat. And like you, we had told our family and friends. It sucked having to go back and tell them. We went on to m/c once more. I am curently 23wks with twins. So thier is hope. HUGS... Just remember we are here for you! HUGS

KAB · #6 July 3rd, 2010, 02:50 PM

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's hard and so confusing when Dr's can't give us answers, and waiting is always so hard. I hope this will be your only loss as well, and that you can go on to have a happy and healthy pregnancy very soon.

~SarahDid~ · #7 July 3rd, 2010, 06:09 PM

Hey Karen,

Just wanted to let you know I'm here with you. I told the Feb DDC earlier today when I got back from the hospital. My levels dropped to 70 and I'm passing huge clots. If you ever need to talk I'm always here.

ohnicole · #8 July 3rd, 2010, 09:21 PM

Karen, I'm sorry for your loss. It is hard to deal with the fear that you have after a m/c. But time will slowly make it bearable. I hope you can find some support from the girls in this group!

TTCin2010 · #9 July 4th, 2010, 06:25 AM

Thank you all for your support.

3Sapphires · #10 July 4th, 2010, 06:56 AM

I'm so sorry for your loss. I understand your fear

I hope you get your sticky bean very soon!

.:Shortcake:. · #11 July 4th, 2010, 07:06 AM

Hugs! I am so sorry for your loss! I'm praying you get a stick BFP soon! Welcome to the board. Feel free to ask any questions you might have.

MamaRN · #12 July 4th, 2010, 05:53 PM

Hi There,

Welcome to the boards and I am so very sorry for your loss. I was 8 weeks when I lost my baby a month ago today. It is one of the hardest things I have had to go through, and some days are still really hard (like today when I should be 12 weeks.

You will find a wonderful group of women here to support you, so please feel free to vent away.

DH and I will be TTC again and it is really scary but all I want is to be pregnant again and to have another baby.

I hope you find what you need here.

((HUGS))

~LaurenNoel~ · #13 July 5th, 2010, 09:15 AM

You were in my DDC, so I saw your posts. I have not had an u/s yet, so I am just trying to stay positive. I had a missed miscarriage at 10 weeks a few months ago, so I know how hard it is. *hugs* I hope you guys can get pregnant again when you are ready, and have a happy and healthy 9 mths. Join in, everyone here is awesome.